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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

is it unreasonable to be lazy?

227 replies

KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 10:48

Having read some threads on here about people listing all the things they do every day to support their families and do everything for the children am i the only one on here who just be arsed with it all?

Dont you just refuse to do anything some days and leave your partner to do it all?

like today, i am doing fuck all. im not cooking or cleaning in fact i plan on sleeping for a couple of hours and making dp pick up my son.

Is this lazy? I think alot of people on here need to stop being super mum and do nothing for a while.

OP posts:
Lovesdogsandcats · 01/02/2011 14:08

Ha ha quite like that one myself too, but think neither are apt here!

WhatsWrongWithYou · 01/02/2011 14:08

I think you need some sort of help in dealing with your DD.

Maybe start a thread (not in AIBU!), and you might find useful suggestions as regards turning things around.

Unfortunately your current post seems to be negating your chances of sympathy here, but I think you have it in your power to change things for the better and this is your best chance of support.

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:08

have you read my other replies the devil? the ones that outline what im doing from 7am until 1 or 3am each day?

OP posts:
Lovesdogsandcats · 01/02/2011 14:09

But WHY has he not washed up, that is the question?!

boyscomingoutofmyears · 01/02/2011 14:09

I'm with the OP on this one! I'm on maternity leave atm and dh still does 95% of the cooking and cleaning, it's what we're used to and hard to break the habit, besides I've no idea where the hoover is Grin.

TheDevilAndTheDeepBlueSea · 01/02/2011 14:13

Ok, I found it.

I don't understand what you've written, if I'm honest. So inbetween the school run and the dinner that you do or do not make, what is it that you do? I'm still confused, frankly.

wubblybubbly · 01/02/2011 14:13

If looking after children isn't a 'job' then what is it nannies do? Confused

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:13

because he couldnt be bothered to wash up, or he forgot and then didnt have time in the morning.

Im not asking for sympathy!

yes he does have to earn the money, just as i usually do. that dousnt get him out of the house work

OP posts:
RealityIsKnockedUp · 01/02/2011 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:18

my daughter, my ddaughter is what i do. The one i cant put down. the one who screams CONSTATNTLY if i so much as stop touching her. i cant cook her luch without her screaming, she gets so pissed off with my daring to do someting other than her she then refuses the food and wont eat it.

she screams the whole way to ad from scghool twice a day because i put her in the pushchair and shes not in my arms.

im not sure you grasp what i mean, then she wont sleep until 1 or 3am EVERY DAY unless im with her. it can take 4 hours of my trying to slip away every night. so he sits down every night from 7 til he goes to bed with no children while im up literally all day and night dealing with her.#

that is why he washes up and is also why some days i say fuck it, over to you darling.

OP posts:
GetOrfMoiLand · 01/02/2011 14:21

I don't see what is wrong with the word skank - it just means slatternly.

If my house is a bit messy I refer to it (and myself) as being skanky.

GetOrfMoiLand · 01/02/2011 14:23

Well, why start a thread saying 'is it unreasonably to be lazy' and mention nothing about your crying child for the first half a dozen posts, and then say you are not actually laxy because you are knackered from being with a demanding child.

No wonder everyone is confused.

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:24

i started a thread about having a day where i do nothing and that i expect my dp to do the washing up each day.

apparently im the one bu. probebly fucking not though!

OP posts:
ragged · 01/02/2011 14:24

I don't understand why OP is getting schtick. It's up to her DP and DC to decide if they mind. Otherwise if her having an occasional day off suits them all, then it suits them all and good for them.

montmartre · 01/02/2011 14:29

I don't think it's lazy to have a day off every now and again. People in paid work have days off.

TheDevilAndTheDeepBlueSea · 01/02/2011 14:29

An occasional day off is one thing. That's not unreasonable, no matter what you do for a job. But that then turned into her partner having to do the washing up or make dinner every day, after he's been out at work.

OP - can I ask you a question? Where is your dd whilst you've been posting on this thread?

MommyMayhem · 01/02/2011 14:29

I think you need to see the Health Visitor about your DD's behaviour.

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:30

i already have

OP posts:
MommyMayhem · 01/02/2011 14:31

Did she have any suggestions of how to deal with it?

MommyMayhem · 01/02/2011 14:33

Maybe try "Toddler Taming" by Dr Christopher Green. He is an Australian paediatrician who has brilliant ideas for dealing with difficult toddlers.

Original poster
KnittedBreast · 01/02/2011 14:37

yep they also said let her scream. ive tried everyhting, nothing works she is too strong willed. shes fine with everyone else just as long as i am there she acts like this til she has me

OP posts:
TheDevilAndTheDeepBlueSea · 01/02/2011 14:38

OP? can I ask you a question? Where is your dd whilst you've been posting on this thread?

WildSheepChase · 01/02/2011 14:41

Duvet day? Yeah, go for it.

YANBU.

undercovamutha · 01/02/2011 14:42

If your child is attached to you at all times, how do you get to have a lazy day?

christmaswishes · 01/02/2011 14:43

if its that bad why don't you send her to nursery and get a job I'm sure the nursery would sort it out and with her mixing with other kids she would not do it there. Maybe she's bored and you need to do more with her to tire her out? Also like someone else said ask some advice from people that know eg health visitor.

I don't think its unreasonable for you to not do too much sometimes but I think it is unreasonable for you to not do an odd job in a day. If you do so much on a normal day then just making his tea on your lazy day isn't much to ask really is it? You can do something quick and just doing basics for me would be classed as a lazy day. Doing nothing that couldn't work because certain things in a day have to be done eg you need to eat, look after kids. Maybe housework can be missed. I'd like to know what you actually do on a non lazy day ? If you want a break from kids then you could ask family or put them in nursery for a day.