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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask if you do it when it is your time of the month?

175 replies

QueenStromba · 31/01/2011 22:21

My current DP doesn't want to have sex while I'm on my period. The issue has only come up in one previous relationship and he was fine with it so I was just wondering how many people have sex while on their period and if you don't is it your choice or your DP's?

OP posts:
oldraver · 02/02/2011 22:03

Yes we do and neither of us mind at all. I'm super horny during my period which is a bonus. I've only met two men who were reluctant, he didnt last long

I had a friend who told me that her DH wouldn't come anyway near her even for a cuddle. She said he made her feel unclean and unloved, oit really dented her confidence

L0ST · 02/02/2011 22:08

I'm male and happy to have sex while my wife is having her period...I'm not squeamish. The only thing that stops us is the messiness and the fact that its not so comfortable due to increased friction....possibly too much detail in this post :)

softglowsandmaybes · 02/02/2011 22:20

I dont have periods just now as i have marena coil, but when i did have them, we didn't tend to do it if i was "on". If it happened during (often did) then we would carry on, not a squeemish issue but all that blood would make it all a bit slippy down there!! sorry

softglowsandmaybes · 02/02/2011 22:21

oh my word LOST - i have just typed the exact opposite to you :)

softglowsandmaybes · 02/02/2011 22:23

I wouldnt split up with someone over that queen, some people are just squeemish, i am the most unsqueemish person there is and i don't really like to have sex during a period. Its only a few days of each month.

Sometimes we have done bumsex during my period, might that work for you/him?

tyler80 · 03/02/2011 08:27

For me it's 25% of the time, periods every 4 weeks for 7 days.

With that in mind, I wouldn't have a problem with someone genuinely squeamish not wanted to get involved in messy stuff but someone who won't even come near you just because your on even though it wouldn't involve any mess is not someone I'd hang onto.

FriggFRIGG · 03/02/2011 10:38

ive never met a man that wanted to...but maybe they were just too scared to ask,

i do go a bit mental around then...

FriggFRIGG · 03/02/2011 10:40

(i also though most people abstained...until i read this thread.)learn something new everyday on MN ehGrin

Original poster
QueenStromba · 04/02/2011 13:19

Thanks for all of the replies ladies - you have probably saved my relationship. In the end I just gave him this thread to read, he had no idea how upset I was about it (he'd put all the weepiness down to PMS) and claims that he didn't have as big a problem with it as I thought he did. I didn't quite believe him on that but he was a lot more convincing than he was previously so we gave it a go and lo and behold his cock did not fall off afterwards, not only that but he actually enjoyed it. :)

OP posts:
PearlBarley · 04/02/2011 13:28

It can be a difficult to achieve sufficient purchase down there if there's lots of blood.

KikiJane · 04/02/2011 13:48

That's brilliant, QS :)

Original poster
QueenStromba · 04/02/2011 17:59

Thanks KikiJane :) We really are perfect for each other (which is bloody impressive since normal is the last thing you'd describe either of us as being) so I was devastated at the idea that I might have to break up with him over this but knew I couldn't face another week every month of feeling so rejected. I'm not weepy anymore so I think being on the pill only contributed slightly to how I was feeling so I'm happier about the idea of getting the implant. I think I'd have felt pretty resentful about it even though I'd basically already decided to get it and spent weeks worrying about whether or not it would actually stop my period. It also means that I know that it won't destroy my relationship if I need to have it taken out because it doesn't agree with me.

OP posts:
ImFab · 04/02/2011 19:04

He doesn't want any kind of sexual contact while you are on. He is entitles to feel like that. I don't get why you are having such a strop about it tbh.

Original poster
QueenStromba · 04/02/2011 21:28

Ah the old not actually bothering to read the thread and then insulting the OP routine. Thank you very much for your valued contribution ImFab.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 23:55

QS...I don't see any insult there from Fab

YOu may not think her input is valuable, but she didn't insult you

Original poster
QueenStromba · 05/02/2011 01:17

I do think it's insulting to accuse somebody of having a strop and in this case it belittles my feelings of rejection over the whole thing. It's especially insulting since she obviously hasn't even bothered reading the thread past the first page (you should at the very least read the first and last page of a thread before you decide to insult the OP).

OP posts:
Ryoko · 05/02/2011 02:02

No, it burns, all that blood makes it sore down there for awhile.

ImFab · 05/02/2011 09:42

I haven't insulted you. You are not happy because your boyfriend won't have sexual contact with you. He is entitled to say no at any time of the month, just as you are.

I get that you feel rejected, you are just being a bit unreasonable imo.

Original poster
QueenStromba · 05/02/2011 16:03

And you still haven't bothered reading the thread ImFab - even just read this page!!

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 05/02/2011 16:06

Hey Queen! I'm really pleased you managed to sort things out with your dp :)

ImFab · 05/02/2011 16:54

I have read all the thread.

sharon2609 · 05/02/2011 17:29

Never met a guy who doesn't want to. Only done it with long term partners though.

DaisyDaresYOU · 06/02/2011 10:14

Yep I have towards the end and concieved my dd.lol

DaisyDaresYOU · 06/02/2011 10:44

I should of said we have Blush

sands88 · 22/02/2011 08:31

I never had before my current boyfriend, just assumed it wasn't done. When I refused once on the grounds of being on, he asked why. Only thing I could think of was the mess and it being gross for him. He said he didnt mind and just to get a towel to lie on. We always do now and I like the feeling. Also like that he's not grossed out my it!

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