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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask if you do it when it is your time of the month?

175 replies

QueenStromba · 31/01/2011 22:21

My current DP doesn't want to have sex while I'm on my period. The issue has only come up in one previous relationship and he was fine with it so I was just wondering how many people have sex while on their period and if you don't is it your choice or your DP's?

OP posts:
Morloth · 01/02/2011 01:46

No chance, DH isn't even allowed to look at me if I have my period, I spent 4 days a month pissed off.

KalokiMallow · 01/02/2011 02:49

Only very very rarely. I hate the mess, as does DH, but I am so ridiculously horny when I am on!

ShowOfHands · 01/02/2011 04:35

lololizzy, I didn't take exception to the differing opinions and points of view. I was offended at the implication that a man not wanting to have sex with a woman on her period is somehow 'suspicious'. He is allowed his preference as much as the next person and it doesn't make him a woman hater.

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 14:44

Arg. This has turned into a massive deal now. Doesn't help that I'm doubly hormonal from having my period and being on the pill :(

OP posts:
MoaningMedalllist · 01/02/2011 14:59

when the river runs red, up the dirt tred!

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:03

He's also the only man I've ever met that doesn't like anal!

OP posts:
onehotmomma · 01/02/2011 15:04

hahahaha Grin

onehotmomma · 01/02/2011 15:05

I don't like anal, feels like I'm doing a big shit that's about to fall out my arse and then gets sucked back up again. LMAO

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:08

Actually that last post was a lie - he does like anal but just not the way that men normally want to do it.

OP posts:
strandedpolarbear · 01/02/2011 15:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onehotmomma · 01/02/2011 15:10

what do you mean Queen? he likes it up his, is that what you mean or am I being thick? Blush

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:13

Broken vagina? Nice.

OP posts:
Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:14

That's exactly it onehotmomma!

OP posts:
kepler10b · 01/02/2011 15:19

my OH thinks sex and periods don't go together and is seen as unclean (although he doesn't mind getting a BJ!). culturally it's how he has been brought up. doesn't really bother me although i do feel a bit more horny at that time of the month.

what bothered me more was a doctor at a GUM clinic a few years ago telling me that you wouldn't want to have sex when you were on your period (with an 'urgh' face). he was gay but honestly, shouldn't these places be a little less judgemental?

BottleOfRum · 01/02/2011 15:20

I do it - even on top, and even if its heavy, if I happen to want it. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. We don't use condoms, so sex is messy with us anyway. I just have some baby wipes next to the bed to clean up after - sorted.

1234ThumbWar · 01/02/2011 15:24

Well you learn something new every day.

I've been married for donkeys years and it's never occurred to me and dh has never said anything. Sometimes he'll ask if it's finished yet, but that could be because I've always said periods on, so it's off the cards.

Hmm guess what tonights topic of conversation is going to be?

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:24

I've already told him that since I don't exist from the waist down then neither does he and that if he wants to have a wank he can go to his room and do it but he's not coming back to my room afterwards (we were housemates before we started seeing each other so he has his own room but always sleeps in mine). I've also pointed out that sometimes women bleed for months at a time when they're on progesterone only contraception. I'm rather tempted to keep telling him that I'm spotting until he does actually want to have sex - I don't imagine it will take too long. He did the whole "if it's that much of an issue we can give it a go" thing this morning but I don't want to do it if he's going to be like that about it.

OP posts:
FlouryBap · 01/02/2011 15:25

Extra lubrication

MoonUnitAlpha · 01/02/2011 15:30

I do, never had a squeamish partner either. I always feel a bit hornier during my period anyway.

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:36

BottleOfRum: I'm on the pill so I'm barely even bleeding anyway. If I hadn't have told him he probably wouldn't have even noticed. I even suggested those beppy sponge tampons someone linked to up thread and he said that if I was going to buy them he'd start keeping better track of where I should be in my cycle!

OP posts:
PuraVida · 01/02/2011 15:44

Interested to hear that some men are squeamish about menstrual blood. Bet they're more than willing to run the risk of a bit if poo on their knob (nob?) in exchange for up the bum fun Grin

onehotmomma · 01/02/2011 15:53

Thats what I don't get pura Confused give me blood over poo anyday

Original poster
QueenStromba · 01/02/2011 15:56

PuraVida: Mine isn't - he thinks that's icky too (unless I'm doing it to him of course) but I bet he's in the minority though.

OP posts:
Alouiseg · 01/02/2011 16:15

I dont think that your relationship has legs tbh, sounds as if its a reasonably new affair and in the early stages sex shouldn't be an issue.

Also it sounds as if you're pressurising him into doing something he doesn't feel comfortable about. If it was the other way round and and he was pushing you for something which you found unpalatable Grin we'd all be up in arms about how badly he's treating you.

Asteria · 01/02/2011 16:19

I do! The heavy day is a bit of a chore, but otherwise I don't really care.

I had one ex who actually insisted on going down... Grossed me out to begin with but he was so insistent that I just let him crack on. Blush