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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Random old ladies touching my baby's hands!

319 replies

MsKLo · 21/01/2011 20:17

AGHHHHHH

So this happened again...

In Tesco's the other day and my baby is in the trolley and I am shopping away when an old lady (I only put old as it has always been old ladies who have done this!) comes up to us and takes my baby's hand in hers...

I really really hate this! Why do people I do not know insist on touching my baby's hands? She puts them in her mouth still, I don't want random strangers who I don't know touching her hands.

Get orrrrfffff! I don't want people touching my baby's hands! One time, this other old lady who was coughing and sniffing came up and went to touch my baby's hand and was offended when I moved my baby away!

Do any of you ladies get annoyed by this or does it not bother you?!

OP posts:
chillichill · 21/01/2011 20:55

woah FRIEDTOACRISP! wtf? that's s bit much.

friedtoacrisp · 21/01/2011 20:55

Is it ok then if young people touch your baby's hands? Young beautiful people? Is that ok? I just really want to know what you think is ON the hands of these poor old ladies who are just admiring a, presumably, bonny baby? Or do you live in a leper colony and you've just not told us that?

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 20:55

that's fine ISNT

I have no problem with people disagreeing but the way some people do so is just bizarre and so rude like friedtoacrisp's angry response! what is all that about?! why do some people have to be so rude about an opinion?!!!!!

OP posts:
BlessedAssurance · 21/01/2011 20:56

bubble for starters they use drugs,so no thank you,i would rather they not touch her hands,

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 20:56

if you read my initial post you would see i put old ladies and said i mentioned the old because in my experience of this it was always old ladies who did it, that is why i mentioned the old!

OP posts:
MrsRigby · 21/01/2011 20:57

YANBU - I fucking hate these people (usually old women, but not exclusively).

WimpleOfTheBallet · 21/01/2011 20:57

Yes BlessedAssurance because prostitutes wipe their arses with their bare hands and then run out to touch as many babies as possible...and they NEVER wash!

Other people have sex you know! Grin

Mumcentreplus · 21/01/2011 20:57

put those scratch gloves on DCs hands...end of...tbh your baby will survive..

WimpleOfTheBallet · 21/01/2011 20:58

ANd no "normal" person uses drugs do they blessed!

Guacamole · 21/01/2011 20:59

I have to say I hate this, but I'm polite and I know they are only doing it because he's a adorable little thing (I think so, so I'm guessing they think so too). I smile, chat, let them admire, touch and when they're well out of sight I give his hands a little rub with a wet wipe. I've had a couple of old ladies kiss him, always on the hands, he was well and truely wet wiped after that!

So YANBU for feeling that way, but YABU if you are being rude!

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 20:59

That is entirely it HEATHCLIFF

Why do some people insist on being so rude about another's opinion?! I see it a lot on MN and think some need to really look at how they reply to threads - myself included at times - i am not saying i haven't been rude in the past but i don't think it is constructive or a great way to talk or debate!

OP posts:
friedtoacrisp · 21/01/2011 20:59

What's a bit much? It's my opinion that the OP is a bit much. Actually the OP sounds borderline anti-social but maybe that's just me. I deplore the erosion of community and human interraction perpetrated by the 'oh my God, no germs on my baby please' brigade.

bubbleandsqueaks · 21/01/2011 20:59

My 80 yr old mother is one of these old ladies.

She would be really hurt if someone pulled their childs hand away from her kind gesture, she only wants to say hello to the baby.

There are some horrible people in this world

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 21:00

no, i am not rude, i only ever said something to the lady with the snotty nose who wiped her snoz then moved to touch my baby's hands!

i just hate it!

OP posts:
chillichill · 21/01/2011 21:00

I'm with you OP. shocked by how rude folk are being.
I don't like anyone I don't know just coming out of nowhere and touching my baby. young or old. different at baby group since you go in expecting that but not ok in the supermarket with no warning.
if however the person had been interacting with my Lo for a while then that's fine, she would have presumably been smiling at said person and therefore be ok with being touched by them but o don't think its right to touch ANYONE you don't know just out of the blue.

MrsRigby · 21/01/2011 21:00

Oh and here here chillichill

hugglymugly · 21/01/2011 21:02

I'm with the OP on this - and I'm a little old lady Grin. I would never do this. It's intrusive of other people's personal space. I might smile at a cute baby and then smile at the parent/carer; or I might sympathise with a parent/carer of a crying baby by saying something like "I remember those days". But I wouldn't grab the hand of a baby or toddler who didn't know me.

FreeBards · 21/01/2011 21:02

She was clearly trying to steal your baby's soul.

Next time club her to death with a stale baguette.

MrsRigby · 21/01/2011 21:02

friedtoacrisp are you by any chance an old women'granny?

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 21:03

Bubble - I would only pull away from someone who has obviously got a cold, I don't do it usually but inwards I really don't like it

I know people dont do it to 'invade' my baby' space as it were but I just really dont like it! But honest, if your ma did it, I wouldn't say anything! Grin

OP posts:
Mumcentreplus · 21/01/2011 21:03

crisp I agree...but some people are a bit PFB so if thats the case..put on the gloves..

Original poster
MsKLo · 21/01/2011 21:04

thanks huggly - I really dont mind chatting to people and I especially love chatting to the older ladies as they are so lovely and love to have a chat! I just really don't like the hand thing...

OP posts:
friedtoacrisp · 21/01/2011 21:05

No MrsRigby I am not. Very far from it. But even if I was - so what? Pointless question. I'll ask you one shall I? Are you a vacuous airhead with a bag full of anti-bac??

Tolalola · 21/01/2011 21:05

Doesn't bother me in the slightest, but then I live in a place where random people will quite often come and take DS off me and play with him if he's fussing (in restaurants, supermarkets, banks etc).

I love it - I get on with whatever I'm doing and find him when I'm finished. I know some of my English friends who've come to visit have been a bit uptight about it at first, though.

Btw, DS is 3, and has NEVER been ill, except for some teething pain. He's never even had a cold, so I think fussing about germs is a bit silly unless a DC has an actual immune issue.

WimpleOfTheBallet · 21/01/2011 21:06

I would be nterested to know how many children all of the "Don't touch my baby" brigade have...I'm curious because I was a bit paranoid with DD1 but now with DD2 I am far easier...I can SEE that many elderly people hone in on us because they know I am a SAHM and they know I have time for a chat...they get to hold the baby's hands and have a giggle...they're lonely.

It's community...it's about giving. Time enough to be precious about baby when she or he begins school and every mucky little sod is passing on their germs to them!