young, close relative has become an "escort" WWYD?

[notreallymehere]

20 something low closeish relative has become an escort. She has been thinking about it for a while, tried it in London, stopped but now has gone back to it in her home town. She is with what appears to be reputable agency and seems to be making quite a lot of money. Lots of reviews now appearing on her webpage etc. She appears fully happy with her choice - she had a job before (working in a coffee bar) but says that the money is better with this (she has previously worked as a lap dancer). My question is what do I tell my friends/acquaintances if they ask about her. I've discussed this with some people when she first started in London and the reaction was very aggressive "well you should have stopped her" etc etc. (hence name change) Fact is that she is an adult and this is her choice and I cannot see how I can stop her - she is making a far bit of money at this and is very financially motivated. However she is part of the family and it is difficult to avoid the questions but many people are very judgemental (of me for somehow "allowing" this to happen).

I remember shesells, yes. :)

No, they don't have to say "yes" to anyone who repels them; if you're earning around £1k a week, it doesn't take long before you have quite a comfortable cushion.

And how do you know they don't fancy them? Why can't they enjoy the act of sex without being instantly drawn to a man?

Why do they have to be enjoying it to not be abused? Surely the feeling of indifference is not abuse?

OFGS, dittany, lube has more than one use! Hope I've put your mind to rest, then.

They are offering to have sex with men they may not fancy. They are not compelled.

Just to clarify 'radical lesbian separatist' is a term I have heard women use to describe themselves and I was not using it perjoratively in itself.

Well, if you're not interested anyway, sex sure isn't more fun if you're dry. Why would you want her to suffer pain?

It's not a choice you would make, plainly, and as I've already said, most women feel the same way. Some women don't, and the OP's relative seems to be one of them.

Why would you want to control the sexual behaviours of other women?

But they do want it Dittany. That is the point. They want to exhange a service for money.

Sometimes they enjoy it, even without the sexual attraction (less attractive men are more attentive, so I am told) sometimes they are indifferent to it. Very occassionally they see who a man who for whatever reason revolts them, so they politly make their excuses and leave.

They don't see sex the way you do. I was told by many that there is 'sex' which is work and there is making love, the two are very different things. One is an exchange between consenting adults for a pre agreed sum of money, the other is the exhange of love and affection, purely for enjoyment.

As DooinMeCleanin has explained, they do want it dittany.

Well, you answered your own question; because they/we (as women) are less economically powerful. However, earning £1+k a week changes that fast; successful escorts are not economically weak any more. So why do they keep doing it? Oh I dunno, maybe they like lots of sex with strangers? And, of course, most will soon have a small number of regulars, so not even all strangers.

But they don't see it like that. They do see it at as work, which they are in the main part indifferent to.

One girl, apparently just loved sex and told me she would have gotten off with a lampost if she thought it could make her orgasm. Most of them just saw it as work. Something they do for money. They didn't attatch the same value to it as you do.

They still had sex for pleasure outside of work, but at work it is work and if they enjoy it it is a bonus.

The voice of an ex-prostitute:

rmott62.wordpress.com/

The more I learn about prostitution, the more I am against it. I used to be ambivalent but know too much to support this industry.

My car was flagged down one evening by a girl in the village where I used to live. A few cars had driven past her. She had had the skin of one of her hands ripped off in little shreds, apparently because she owed someone money.

She wouldn't let me drive her to the hospital and I ended up taking her home. She said she was going out that evening to prostitute herself because she needed money. What she needed was a trip to A&E.

Who the hell would have sex with someone whose hand was in that state? Someone would, clearly, because she was pretty confident that she would get her money that night. And she was so desperate for money to pay this person back that she was willing to go and stand out on the streets with her hand in a mess and sleep with whichever stranger came along that night.

The blog I've posted a link to above contains the painful writing of someone who was a prostitute for many years. She is still severely physically and emotionally traumatised.

Apparently the handbook for prostitutes in Amsterdam contains advice on how to inject your own vagina with anaesthetic in case it becomes too painful at the end of the day. Any career 'choice' that involves injecting yourself with anaesthetic to numb the pain ain't a good one in my book.

Legalisation and regulation will only serve to give men the message that they are entitled to buy a woman whenever they feel like it. And I am sick of listening to the (married) tossers I work with go on about how they've paid for sex abroad and how it doesn't matter because the girl loved it (obviously) and it didn't mean anything so therefore it wasn't cheating.

I said earlier, I have had fuck buddies for whom I have had no sexual attraction, and as I said that was preferable, quite a few of my friends, in fact I can't think of any, who haven't done the same, and apart from 1 who cell for her buddy and ended up with him we have all become normal functioning members of society. The benefit of having a buddy you don't fancy is that the sex is purely and mutual self gratification and you don't have to worry about feelings or about what they think of you, it's just pure fun at a time that's convenient. My escort friend who also slept with some of her clients says it felt just like that for her but she was paid too. So not a bad deal in my eyes.

We're not talking about desperate streetworkers, though. This is a young woman working through an apparently reputable agency. No-one's going to be ripping her hands to pieces.