"Ds1, please don't use your willy as a stylus for the DS Lite"

[coldtits]

"Ds2, you don't do it either, please. PANTS ON for all activities except the bath and the toilet. No, I don't want to see you shake it. Thanks. Or poking it out of the side of your pants. FOR GOD'S SAKE, YOU'RE 7 AND 4, YOU'RE TOO OLD TO NOT WEAR PANTS!!!"

DS is another who stuck his through the hole in a DVD. When asked what on earth he was doing he replied "I'm just doing my exercises".

SIL to DN: Don't do that darling.

A bit later

SIL to DN: Don't do that darling.

A bit later

SIL to DN: Darling, don't do that, it's not very nice

DN: Oh it is Mummy, it's lovely!

I read the thread title out to B/F and we both just said "that would be what DS would do"

Oh the shame, but due to much willy talk in our house by DS, my DD always announces when I'm drying her after bath time what we're drying next. "first my hair, then my bum and now my willy!" she's two. There's no hope!

We have The Willy Dance in this house - much like that Australian theatre show a while back only involving a 7 year old who will put both hands in the air, both knees up mother-brown-style and waggle his todger up and down.

Cue lots of 'just ignore him dd' type noises and occasional smirks because it is actually pretty funny.

DS also does the willy dance, has put it though a cd, in a cup of water and regularily tries to see how much he can hide in his foreskin..... he has lots of foreskin so its quite q few car tyres worth

We recently had to see the doctor again about his excess foreskin and right on que he started to show her its abilities in all its glory

Wow we've got enough of them for a whole troupe of willy dancers - and who says Britain hasnt got talent?

DS is going through a skinny phase and I'm forever having to hoik his trousers up at the back because of builder's bum. Walking around Tesco's a few weeks back, a very loud and very amused voice pipes up behind me - 'Mummy, LOOK - I've got Builder's Willy'

I have all this to come my ds has only discovered his in passing, he's not that interested yet!

However my brother was a bit strange as a small child. When he was small my brother would tell my mum that he had different "micks" on at different times of the day (we didn't call them willies in our house) and that he kept the ones he wasn't using in a drawer under the sink he also said they have something called "micktricity" sometimes. He denies all knowledge of any of this nowadays.

I didn't think girls would be inclined to this sort of behaviour but as a toddler one of my SILs would straddle the arm of the sofa and rock we also caught her holding onto a door handle with her legs either side of the door once too.

PMSL

I caught my DS and DD (5 and 4) using DS's willy as a slide for their dolls

This is a fucking excellent thread! Am proper laughing

My three like to have shower together and they usually do the Ghostbusters tune and shout about crossing the streams and not crossing the streams as they wee up the wall. This then morphs into Star Wars and they have lightsaber fights and then into Dr Who and sonic screwdrivers.

I had to get rid of my electric toothbrush the othe day as I walked in on DC2 using it and not to brush his teeth.

willy dance - check (father, 34 and son, 3)
Willy slap - check (father only)
inappropriate willy/scrotum fiddling - check (father and son)
interest in willy stiffness - check (father only so far, son not really noticed [lucky me emoticon])

Oh this is hilarious! Ds has only discovered his in the bath once for some cursory plucking. ( at about 9 mos.) Dn used to call his " my big button" as the bellybutton was the little one. He would get quite excited about finding it on occasion because he had such a fat tummy it wasn't always available.

I am now crying with laughter!

SO glad its not just my son who does these things!!!

Oh thank you thank you, I have been crying with laughter, (my dh has just leapt down the stairs because he thought I was actually crying I was so loud).
It's so reassuring to know it's not just us!

I told DH about this thread and he said "I've thrust mine into a plateful of food on occasion".
Lovely. Really looking forward to my lunch now.

Have just snorted coffee all over my keyboard - MUST LEARN NOT TO READ THESE THREADS AT WORK

pmsl .
My youngest boy loves to do the aquadraw mats .
We gave him a large one for his 3rd birthday . He lost the water pen.
He still played with that aquadraw.

Thought he`d found a paintbrush , until i caught him.

pixiestick ... is apple pie off the menu in your house then?

DS (at the age of 2-3) once splattered the toilet seat spectacularly...on further investigation he revealed he had held the end of his willy tightly so as no to let any wee out...and it had swelled like a little water balloon so he let go

I insist on hands being on show at all times during meals and cant abide DS (12 now) walking around the house with his hands down his pants ....FGS if you really need to play with it go to your room!!!

His commando days were also cut short rather quickly after trapping his foreskin in his zipper........now that was a tough one to sort and DP was nominated !!!!

Have been up most of the night with poorly 10 year old (DS) and have had to alternate giving calpol and warm drinks with "PLEASE take your hand of of your pants!" It must give him comfort...
Crying with laughter at this thread, just what I needed after 3 hours sleep!!

Also, DS2 (4), can retract his foreskin (too much playing with it I think - the others can't) to expose his helmet.

I ask him not to do this as I have visions of it not going back and strangulated helmets. He likes to bribe me sometimes...

'Let me have a biscuit mum or I will get my purple thing out!'

I have to look the other way and do a massive silent laugh so he can't see/hear me.
:o

Little git.

Lol at " get my purple thing out".

One 5 year old DS here, his willy escapades are rather boring compared to some of these.