ExpatScot I don't hate my sister. What I hate is that recently I've just found out how much lying she has been doing to me as of late. She just told about $1000 + worth of merchandise she's bought for her two children, other sister and mother. Then she proceeded to tell me how unfair it was that they don't get gifts for the DC's in their Xmas food hamper. If they didn't buy the new playstation, they wouldn't have to get the food hamper. She boasted that getting the food hamper means they can buy more booze for Xmas and NY's and have a great party. This has gone on for the last few years, but only now have I found out from the other sister, who busts her own ass in a job that she doesn't like but knows that that is what you must do to get ahead sometimes and make a life for yourself. The last few years, come January, I'm wiring her money to get her through the month, which is only due to the massive spending they do at Christmas. Throughout the year for the last few years, she has rung me for $100's of dollars to get asthma medicine for her son and her heat and hydro bill, all of which I send because one helps family out. DH and I don't have loads of money to spread around as we have our own family to support. The medicine, I've just found out, has always been covered by her welfare and heat and hydro is included in her rent, which comes directly off the top of their cheque every month to the co-op and therefore, doesn't even get a heat and hydro bill. My father stopped giving her money because he died and my other sister stopped because, living in the same city, she knew what the money was really being spent on. Her and her DP are fully capable of working but won't work because of a whole host of reasons, from 'I don't want to stand for 4 hours as a cashier' to 'the debit card machines are too complicated to use' to 'I don't want to wear a uniform' to 'I don't want to stare a computer screen all day or talk to people'. They both have a grade nine education. She won't get her highschool equivalency because it 'just sounds like too much work'. They are both 31 years of age. Both her children are in school, 10 and 12 years of age and when I ask what she does all day, she tells me she cleans and watches tv. Once a month they fill in a form and list where they have handed out resumes to but she openly admitted that they just open the phonebook and right in stuff, that they've never sent out any, ever because she 'hates how much walking she has to do'. I think I have every right to be fucking pissed off at her right now, especially when I see my DH work 12-15 hour days 5-6 days a week, on his feet. I busted my ass working shite jobs to pay for my degrees and bills so I wouldn't be burdened with student loans when I finished and so I could make a better life for my family. DH and I are making the same amount of money as they are but because they are on welfare they get a nice 3 bedroom townhouse with full basement and yard at $800 a month, heat, hydro and cable included, while DH and I are living in a basement flat that is the same size as her fucking living room for $1000 a month, nothing included. DD's room is so small, it cannot fit a queen size bed in and doesn't have a window. We are living within our means and she, clear to me now, isn't and I'm sending our meagre bits of money at the end of my month to her; they are ripping off a system that is there to help people in need; she and her partner are simple fucking lazy asses. I didn't imply at all there were swathes of people doing this, but they are out there and having lived in London pretty extensively as well as Canada, both systems could use a sweeping reform of the social system to ensure that the individuals and family's that need the support get it without hassle.