DS wants to be a princess

[MrsKitty]

Nursery are having a 'superheros & princesses' themed dressing up day next week for charity.

DS (3.10) wants to be a princess. AIBU to agree that he can be? .

I think it's rather sweet personally. DH not convinced.

Children would be more open minded if their parents bothered to teach them to be, and if everyone did so then the world would be a far better place.

Imarriedafrog - I think you mean gender dysphoria, not dysmorphia?

meleza great post

to mrsruffallo:

if "my son has told he is gay, should I let him tell people or should he hide it in case people are homophobic?"

I am currently doing my masters/phd research on same-sex parents and their children's experiences of school. and i can assure you it doesn't mater in the slightest if people are out and proud or if they are in the closet. Those who are out get the hassle, those who are in the closet have the constant worry of being found out.

What has being gay have to do with your choice of clothes?

There are many things that would make the world a better place, I am not sure encouraging your son to wear a dress is one of them.

mysticflame; I don't know why you have directed that post at me.

You are doing a masters on same sex couples-well done. I don't know why you feel the need to share that with me though.

We do not live in a gender equal society. It stinks. It's crap. But it is our reality right now.

People won't become magically open minded by seeing a 3 year old boy in a tutu - they will either think (as I would) "aw bless him"

or

"WTF were his parent's thinking?"

Most will err on the second response - it aint right, it ain't pretty, but it's true.

And all the chat about "changing society through our own beliefs" is making me LOL

I'm comparing them, not saying they are tied together.

A few decades back the same fears were being expressed about sons and daughters liking members of the same sex, parents didn't want their children to admit it in public as it meant there was a chance they would get hassle.

This thread is about fears being expressed about sons liking wearing dresses, parents don't want their children to do it in public as it means there is a chance they will get hassle.

See what I did there?

Was there a risk to the gay/bi children, yes. But did it improve their lives by encouraging them to hide it? No.

So I ask again in relation to the current topic. Will it improve the lives of boys who like to wear dresses to encourage them to hide it?

And why is changing society through our own beliefs so laughable? It's been done before, many times. Just because things aren't currently equal, none of us should try to change that?

yeahs sorry directed at the wrong person by mistake. and i was sharing it because it's relevant, because narrow minded people like on this post make innocent children feel they have to conform for whatever reason!

It's interesting that the only comparison you make is that of being gay though. My gay friends don't wear dresses.

I don't think that being gay is a choice and put on or off as easily as choosing clothes.

Personally, I don't think that children have a very strong urge to cross dress, so I don't see it having the same impact on them as pretending to fancy girls/ boys when they don't.

Is this thread a joke?

FFS don't be so quick to label others narrow minded!
I live in inner city London, maybe we don't have enough time or energy to worry about Johnny being upset because he couldn't wear a bra to school

God, Kaloki, how old are you? You sound so immature. This is about boys wearing dresses, not changing the world.

OMFG you did not just say that? being gay is a choice you can TURN ON AND OFF? seriously whats your IQ?

It was the first one to come to mind mrsruffalo as it is often the first thing people assume on seeing a guy in a dress.

Let's change it to something else shall we, a choice. Say, not wanting to be Christian earlier in the century?

And I do know children who do have a strong urge to cross dress, in fact there is one talked about up thread. But I personally know one who has serious gender issues as his father was very strict on him not wearing dresses in public when he was young.

So we are wrong for wanting the world to be a place where people are free to wear what they like?

wtf!! just let your kids wear what they want!!! i bet if you ask any mother of a grown up male if they have any pictures of there son dressed as a girl they have!!! how many of them r actually gay!

if my ten year old wanted to wear a tutu out then so be it! but we aint even talking about a ten year old r we, a 3 year old!
3 year olds have no idea whats for boys or girls and why should they care, let them be who they want to be!

do you really want you child to grow up as a run of the mill normal person!! really!??

im with mystic all the way on this one, all clothes should have no gender identity!!

and as for being able to turn being gay on ad off! get real!

I want to go out in my PJ's an my skanking dressing gown.

Actually, I think mrsruffallo was objecting to homosexuality and clothing being compared, because you can't turn off your sexuality.

Whereas you can change your clothes.

wishit Yes, and? Do it then, no skin off my nose. Neither is it any business of mine anyway if it was.

mystic, mrsruffalo said "I don't think being gay is a chocie and put on and off as easily as choosing clothes"

At 3, my boys would regularly come home from nursery with painted nails, beautifully done by the nursery workers! At that age nobody batted an eyelid. And neither should anyone bat an eyelid. Sadly people do.

I suppose for any parent the question is, what do you do about the bigots? Do you allow your son to go out in the tutu and risk ridicule but let him be himself. Or do you insist that he not be himself in order to quieten the bigots?

I feel the bigotry should be challenged but am not sure a child should be the one in the firing line.

Aw, I love it when we get into MN Utopia.

It's my favourite.

The place where everyone gets to express themselves and the shit that ensues is like water off a ducks back;

Not at all unrealistic.

yes but you shouldnt change clothes if you dont want to!!
i experienced years and years of being forced to be someone im not and its so horrible!! finally thought back and couldnt be happier!

please just let your kids be whoever they want to be!!!

Jessie Somebody's gender identity also cannot be changed. People don't choose to be trans. They just got lucky!