Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11

Original poster

DS wants to be a princess

274 replies

MrsKitty · 01/12/2010 18:16

Nursery are having a 'superheros & princesses' themed dressing up day next week for charity.

DS (3.10) wants to be a princess. AIBU to agree that he can be? .

I think it's rather sweet personally. DH not convinced.

OP posts:

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:41

and no-one has said gay people go around in tutus. but that is the normal reason behind people's objection to boys wearing any kind of "girl" clothes

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:41

You lot have the stereotype all wrong. I didn't mention gay AT ALL. That's all you lot! Astounding and offensive

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:42

ok, so explain WHY you object to a 10 year old wanting to wear a tutu

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:42

And I'm the bigot ha ha. You are saying gays wear tutus!

frgr · 01/12/2010 18:42

People, people, stop responding to spikeycow, she's a troll. Comes out with the most stupid of statements and eggs each thread on for more in the most controversial manner possible. I do wish there was an ignore function on MN so I didn't see his/her posts any more.

TiggyD · 01/12/2010 18:42

I don't think anybody is saying 10 year old boys should wear make-up. Haven't you heard about the "Let boys be girls" campaign? You don't need make-up at 10.

earwicga · 01/12/2010 18:43

spikeycow - I didn't mention homophobia either. If you love the artificial gender binary and asociated clothing rules then it's up to you. But it makes you wrong.

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:43

Because how can they? They'd be battered, ostracised, and spat on. Is that OK?
Why the gay stereotype?

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:43

ahh yes this is number 2 on "how to respond when you're wrong on the internet"

keep repeating what other people say in an attempt to "make a point"

doesn't work. sorry

camdancer · 01/12/2010 18:44

My 3yo DS was a princess for halloween. He also regularly wears skirts to preschool. He does usually wear trousers under the skirts but sometimes he wears tights. No teasing at all. I think it is sad that at some point it will become unacceptable - at least among some people. He has already started with the "blue is for boys and pink for girls" rubbish. Apparently "I'm kidding" when I say it is wrong.

Asteria · 01/12/2010 18:44

I apologise if that was not your particular gripe with the tutus et al Spikeycow - that is just the usual remark that emerges from narrow minded people when boys in dresses comes up. Please do enlighten us as to exactly WHAT your issue is with boys wearing girls clothes - that way nobody is getting wires crossed

LadyViper · 01/12/2010 18:44

what spikey was saying wasn't that its wrong for a 10 year old to wear a tutu, she was saying that she doesn't think its appropriate in public. I am inclined to agree. A 10 year old may not fully appreciate that they could be labelled and subject to abuse for it.

jessiealbright · 01/12/2010 18:44

SpikeyCow, am I correct in thinking that you would be concerned about the risk of ridicule for a ten year old boy who publicly wore a tutu? Rather than outright supporting gender norms as correct and reasonable, and thinking that deviating from them is morally wrong?

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:45

well i can't imagine any 10 year old would be out anywhere that that would happen. by themselves. with no way of getting back?

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:45

I'm not a troll you dick. Just more real than the rest of you. And intolerant of nonsense

Nettee · 01/12/2010 18:46

re the 10 year old in a tutu - it is all about what the other boys would say and do ie laugh, be mean and then exclude your ds.

I think though that for a your 3 year old dressing up as a princess at nursery there wouldn't be a problem. I think it is sweet too and 3 year olds generally don't think about it. (although one of my ds's little friends (girl) did tell him that boys weren't allowed to like pink when he was 3)

Mind you I think I am probably narrow minded and scared of people who are different because I am trying to persuade my 5 year old ds to give up ballet and tap and take up street dance mainly because I don't want his friends to tease him about it at school.

neepsntatties · 01/12/2010 18:47

No one said anything about gay people going around in tutu's.

LadyBiscuit · 01/12/2010 18:48

Some of you may have the next Alexander McQueen but you're going to stamp it out of him because you're so scared of him being ridiculed

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:48

I think it's not appropriate. OK in a dance class or whatever but not on the street where all their mates would see. Nothing to do with being gay. I'm not a feminine woman at all but that isn't as unacceptable as feminine boys. We live in a rough area which makes it even more obvious you wouldn't go out like that.

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:49

yeah right! thanks for the heads frgr

if my 10 year old wanted to wear a tutu out i wouldn;'t just say "yeah sure, off you go"
of course i would have a talk with him first about how many narrowminded individuals may have a problem with what he was wearing, so that he could make the decision fully aware that he may meet with negativity
and i would ensure that he was kept safe all the time and wasn't in any kind of situation where he would get "battered" regardless of what he was wearing

but all the time peple take the tack of "well, they just CAN'T" then we are just as bad as the people who show outward negativity. you aren't allowing anything to change. you're contributing as much as the people who are hostile

sausagerolemodel · 01/12/2010 18:49

As an aside, I think its ridiculous that the nursery have chosen that as a theme at all in 2010. Notwithstanding the OP's DS most of the girls will probably be princesses and most of the boys will probably be "heroes"

Superhero (job description): extraordinary superpowered person able to save the world from evil through the physical manifestation of his greatness (extra strength, able to freeze water etc etc)

Princess (job description): must look gorgeous in order to attract handsome prince who will marry her and take care of her forever more. Need worry her little head about nothing other than how she looks.

sigh

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:50

but what if their friends are real friends, who don't judge them?

i can't imagine many 10 year olds would suddenly turn up at the skatepark one day weqaring a tutu would they? they'd either have been at ease with it and always have done it, or realise that it isn't a place where they want to do that.

spikeycow · 01/12/2010 18:51

Well I couldn't use my children as a social experiment. They aren't interested in tutus anyway so it won't come up.

thisisyesterday · 01/12/2010 18:51

agree sausagerollmodel!

TerrysNo2 · 01/12/2010 18:52

I know a boy who had a favourite dress when he was 2/3 and there are plenty of pics of him in it. He is very cool about it all and not at all embarrassed (he is now 18/19) He is a very trendy dresser now too.

Let your DS wear whatever he wants and sod everyone else, he is 3 - let him get away with it while he can!!

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11