to not tell my friend what her fiance got up to on his stag weekend?

[BottleOfRum]

Best friend is getting married to her partner of 5years. Have always thought they made a lovely couple.

DH, and a number of other mutual male friends went on the stag weekend. DH came home and said that the best man had organised strippers to turn up to the hotel room, and they hancuffed the groom-to-be to the bed, and one of the strippers gave groom-to-be a blow job.

I am absolutely disgusted by this. Mostly disgusted by the behaviour of the best man, who organised it, but also with all the men present, who must have been instrumental in handcuffing their friend to the bed. I can't believe how disrespectful it is to my friend who is getting married to him.

Now, since the groom-to-be was tied up, I don't blame him as much as the others - there is not much he could do apart from protest I would imagine.

If you knew this information, would you tell your best friend? My first thought was that its none of my business, and I wont mention it, but its been playing on my mind since, and I can imagine how hurt she would be with me if she knew I knew and didn't tell her.

OP you need to tell your friend. Imagine how you would feel it if it was your DH? If it was mine the anger and humiliation in relation to actual act and then the thought that people knew and didn't tell me would drive me insane.

I am fuming on your friends behalf. Whores/strippers/whatever. Who the fuck do her DF and the best man think they are to treat her like that? I suppose they thought they were in the fucking Hangover??

I might feel differently about this if they were already married or had no wedding plans and he had just cheated but as far as i'm concerned they will be laughing at her on the wedding day and no one deserves that.

All these it's not your business, what happens on the stag.. & he was assaulted arguments are bollocks. The RIGHT thing to do is to tell her straight. YABU to do anything else.

(BTW I know you didn't ask but perhaps you should consider what sort of man your DH is to be complicit in this?)

what the little woman doesn'tknow about, need not trouble her fluffy mind - that kind of thing

CupcakesandBunting, you read my mind! the CD posting style is identical!!!!

OOh, look!

whats all this 'he was assaulted' nonsense?? no he wasn't, am pretty sure the stripper/hooker wasn't dying to give anyone a bj. She got paid regardless. He was alone in the room and let the girl do it. it was a free bj, he was drunk, egged on, what bloke wouldnt? then he boasted about it, how else would they all know? If this comes out he and he has an ounce of sense he will just deny the bj happened and will say he was p8ssed and that he lied to his mates cos of bravado. She will believe him cos she wants to.
so yeah, actually go ahead and tell your mate cos it'll probably be ok except it really will affect your relationship with her. When they get hitched the groom isnt going to want you around much.

fucking idiot men.

so pissing well predictable, what a bunch of kids.

What were the other prostitutes doing while one was giving the GTB a blow-job? Filing their nails?

Actually, re-reading the thread title, I think I would be absolutely gutted if my friend didn't tell me something like that. :(

YOU did not witness the incident. It is therefore NOT your place to tell her.

Besides, perhaps I of all people should know that couples can be very diverse regarding what they allow each other to do iyswim.

momentsintime

I know a few guys who actually would be quite happy to turn down a 'free blowjob' from someone who isn't their partner if they are in a relationship.

Not that they don't like blowjobs, they just aren't totally ruled by their dick.

dammed whatever you do, Id say nothing tho as will likely cause such a shit fest

vile, can you imagine women doing that!!! ugh

oh, and they aren't pathetic enough to need to buy or bought sexual acts for a laugh

"it's not something i would want him to do but it if it's on a stag do i don't want to know"

your husband can shag other women on shag do's? you just don't want to know 'coz what happens on stag dos stays on stag dos? *taps nose

dirty Sanchez? what like,lighting their own farts or something?

Yet again I find myself agreeing with Spidookily.

If I was the bride I would want to know. If I found out after the event and found out my friend(s) had known but hadn't told me I'd be furious. I'd consider the friendship(s) to be over.

be bought

NO DONT TELL YOUR FRIEND!

Your dh has been a bit naughty offloading his guilt onto you.

I think this isnt your guilt to carry, you werent there, you dont know what went on.

Agreed, anastasia. I think that particular stereotype is extremely belittling to men and women.

anastasia - under those circumstances? doubt it. apart from your DP of course, and mine. Ours are NEVER the ones who indulge in this behavior...

You don't seem to think a lot of men in general, momentsintime.

nope wouldn't tell her, nothing good could come of this

I know what we're like!

No you know what you are like maybe your friends and those you know but not everyone.

@ClassyDiva.

I think you'll find that standing there smiling like a Tory politicians wife with Stokholm syndrome next to your husband who you know or suspect has cheated on you is the 50s attitude to have.

A modern woman would not stand for this type of shit.

Well, you know what you and your friends are like. Don't think you can really generalise about half the worlds population. Or are all men the same? Because women sure as hell aren't.

10% of men admitted to paying for sex, BMJ report. Those are just the ones who admitted to it. Doesnt excuse it but this kind of stag behavior is hardly unheard of. This is a really tough position to be in Bottle. I do feel sorry for you.