the horrible woman in this week's grazia who doesnt want kids because...

[superv1xen]

...she is scared of getting fat and ruining her figure and getting a -i can barely type these words- "bucket vagina"

aibu to think she is a silly shallow bitch and be really angry with her for peddling her horrible opinions in public? its up to the individual whether they want kids or not but what a nasty, shallow reason to not want them :( and how insulting to mothers reading that. she is a 35 year old woman who seemed reasonably intelligent, not some silly WAG-type 20 year old that one would maybe expect to hear this kind of shit from.

does she not realise that she won't have her perfect body forever anyway, gravity catches up in the end regardless of whether she has kids or not. and i would rather have an "imperfect" body and my lovely kids any day. did anyone else read it? it made my blood boil.

i don't want my children because tey are noisy, messy, demanding, naughty, expensive and vile.

my vagina however is quite tight.

Scottish mummy - excellent post.

For some women, whether they are mothers already or intend to be in the future, they can FAR TOO EASILY take offence at a perceived slight on their lives if someone else expresses a desire to do something different, giving reasons that are close to the "offendee's reasons FOR doing something.

Sorry, that was a really SHIT description, but basically it doesn't matter if you think it's a shallow reason, for her it is the reason that she's decided not to have children. Like a few other posters said, she might as well be honest rather than come up with some bullshit excuse that anyone would see right through in 5 seconds flat!!

SO?

YABU she is allowed to not want children

What's wrong with Grazia?

But yes OP YABU....who gives a bugger if she is afraid of a bucket fanny? Or why ANY woman decides not to have kids...it's not a personal slur against all Mothers.

yabu. her body, her choice. clearly her desire to have children is less than her desire to avoid changes to her body, fair enough.

It is a shallow reason, but it is kind of true that your body is never the same again. I feel sad for her really. To miss out o such a great thing for this reason is a shame.

She sounds like the kinda twunt I'd avoid at all costs in RL. Glad she's not having kids.

I guess your reaction to the article really depends on your self esteem. I read the article and thought "major assumptions there!" but certainly didn't have such an emotional response to it.

After I had DS1 by EMCS, DH went out with some friends and the first question the girlfriend of one of them, (who was a lot younger than us) asked was whether my CS scar would show wearing a bikini.

I thought that was very funny when he told me, thought it said a lot about her vanity/body image

Who cares?

If someone doesn't want children it's no skin off my nose.

In fact, I think more people should not have children. Not everyone is suited to parenthood and I can think of quite a few people who really shouldn't have become parents because they just weren't cut out for it.

If you know it's not for you, then you bloody shouldn't inflict yourself as parent on innocent children

I certainly don't take the opinion of a stranger as a personal criticism. It doesn't matter what she thinks. She's irrelevent in my life. As she is in yours.

not a shame at all.buys into notion that female fulfilment comes largely from motherhood and women who arent mums are to be pitied for missing out

I take your point scottishmummy. I would just like to think that people would think things through on a more logical level. Maybe I am judgy in that I put less store on appearance so think that's a trivial reason

I 100% think there are good, logical reasons not to have children, I just don't think this is one

I don't see why there's anything wrong with what she says. I don't think having a baby does many favours for your body, but I personally didn't mind that as for me having children brought me the greater happiness than preserving a non-baby(?) body. She feels the opposite, nothing wrong with that. However my body does look better than some childless women soooo... .

Haven't seen article. Grazia is a pile of shite. Woman sounds like a tosspot.

mine too megapixels!

High-fives JamieLee :D [shallow]

Anyone who talks about having a bucket fanny clearly hasn't spoken to someone who's had two lots of 2nd degree tears and some rather tight stitching. I think I was revirginised with DD and am waiting until I think my DH deserves to have my cherry again

YABU. Her comments are no worse than those of mothers who tell you that it is perfectly possible to spring back into shape and you do not have to have a saggy tummy for the rest of your life Perfectly good reason not to have children.

Serendippy - do you really mean that?

YABU she's entitled to her opinion. Not everyone wants to have children.

Jamie which bit? The bit about hating being told that childbirth is no excuse for a saggy tummy or the bit where I say that as nobody has to have children, any excuse is fine by me?

@ SuperSal

One of the reasons why I'm against having a third is that it might ruin my figure. The fact I'm seeing it as an issue proves that having a third may not be for the right reasons. I've been very lucky so far and have managed to restore my figure to its former, er, glory but having a third child may just be asking too much...

And ranked somewhere near the bottom is the fact that my pelvic floor might completely give way next time - it's bad enough as it is.

If I sound superficial, I couldn't give two hoots.

I think she's entitled to not want children for whatever reason, shallow or not.