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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to think it is wierd for a mum to wash her adult son's hair?

155 replies

HannahHack · 15/11/2010 15:03

Right, I am only on MN as my DP has forbidden me from mentioning it!

He told me that one of his best friends (26yo) has his hair washed by his mum when he goes home. Now, is it just me or is that just f'ed up!?

OP posts:
RealityBomb · 15/11/2010 15:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cupcakesandbunting · 15/11/2010 15:05

Fucked up.

Norman Bates complex.

numotre · 15/11/2010 15:06

I think it depends on whether it is done when he is naked in the bath (very weird) or whether its done in the kitchen sink.

cupcakesandbunting · 15/11/2010 15:07

haidresser washing your barnet is different. That's what happens when you visit the hairdressers. How do you even get to the point where your mum is washing your hair at 26?

"My 'do could do with a wash"

"Go up the bathroom, son. I'll be up when Corrie's finished"

booyhoo · 15/11/2010 15:07

why is it fucked up? i love getting my hair washed by someone else. if only i had someone to do it for me.

Tortington · 15/11/2010 15:08

has he got long hair?

muggglewump · 15/11/2010 15:10

I wouldn't go as far as fucked up, but I do think it's a bit strange.

Original poster
HannahHack · 15/11/2010 15:10

@Custardo He has a public school boy boufant (sp?).

OP posts:
shinyshoes · 15/11/2010 15:11

my sons are both soap dodgers and think they'll melt if they go near soap or shampoo.

Perhaps shes told him to get upstairs as his hair is in rather a state

RoxieP · 15/11/2010 15:13

Men don't even get their hair washed by a hairdresser though. Real men go to the barbers. And it takes 2 seconds flat for a man to wash his hair. The only reason for getting somebody else to do it is for pleasure. So that somebdoy should NOT be his mum. Especially at 26.

booyhoo · 15/11/2010 15:15

arf @ 'real' mean go to the barbers. what century are you in? and is a mum not allowed to do something for her son that he enjoys? is she not allowed to cook meals for him either? or what about play games on teh xbox with him? is that banned too?

KurriKurri · 15/11/2010 15:17

My DH's mum used to wash his hair when I met him. (age 21) It should have set off warning bells (When we got married, she had to be hospitalised because she was so upset she had 'lost' her son, and FIL was on the phone everyday begging him to leave me) So yes, it's bloody weird.

Flisspaps · 15/11/2010 15:19

and is a mum not allowed to do something for her son that he enjoys?

I bet he enjoys washing his willy too, but you won't be arguing for her to do that for him, will you booyhoo?

OP - YANBU. 26 is too old to have your hair washed by your Mum. I don't even let the hairdresser do mine.

booyhoo · 15/11/2010 15:21

well, as his willy forms part of his genitals no i wouldn't be arguing for that but this is is hair Shock

Quodlibet · 15/11/2010 15:22

I think it's weird a mother washing her adult son's clothes, let alone his hair. Yuk.

Sarsaparilllla · 15/11/2010 15:35

I think that's strange for a mother to be washing a son or daughter's hair at that age, surely as soon as kids are old enough to do that unsupervised they just do?

Odd, definitely odd and it'd put me off a bloke if it was someone I was dating, most definitely

ENormaSnob · 15/11/2010 15:36

Yanbu

it's very bizarre IMO

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 15/11/2010 15:39

yes it's weeeeird. I would find it very strange. More the level of "looking after" that this implies than any kind of skeevy familial lurve weirdness. I wouldn't think it was normal for anyone's mum to wash their feet either, or shave their armpits for them.

Original poster
HannahHack · 15/11/2010 15:41

He's not 'unclean' as some people have suggested. In fact he is otherwise a normally functioning, financially independent adult with a GF. He is an only child though. Is this PFB syndrome perhaps?!

OP posts:
ElephantsAndMiasmas · 15/11/2010 15:45

Probably she asks/insists (is his dad in the picture, or is it a "just the two of us" type thing?) and he hasn't yet managed to grow up enough to say "no thanks Mum FFS I'm 26".

My brother only realised a few years ago when I told him, that he doesn't actually have to answer our mum's questions about e.g. whether he's kissed that girl he's dating. Think men/boys feel obligated to their mothers, more than girls for some reason, and don't always know where to draw the line.

chipmonkey · 15/11/2010 15:49

Maybe if his Mum was a hairdresser. But otherwise no, it's weird. Ds1 and ds2 have been washing their own hair for ages.

Original poster
HannahHack · 15/11/2010 15:49

@Elephant His Dad is around, and they are married. Wonder how he justifies it really!

OP posts:
30andMerkin · 15/11/2010 15:49

Is she a hairdresser/Indian Head Massage therapist? If so, then fine.

If not, then YANBU.

30andMerkin · 15/11/2010 15:50

OOh, I htink that was my first YANBU. Only been here a year.

Sorry, as you were.

Original poster
HannahHack · 15/11/2010 15:54

@30andMerkin Glad you don't think I'M being unreasonable.

BTW everyone, she is not a hairdresser or anything like that. I think she is in admin or something similar.

OP posts: