... to think it is wierd for a mum to wash her adult son's hair?

[HannahHack]

Right, I am only on MN as my DP has forbidden me from mentioning it!

He told me that one of his best friends (26yo) has his hair washed by his mum when he goes home. Now, is it just me or is that just f'ed up!?

I've just remembered my cousin and her friend who used to stay with me. i used to dye their hair for them but after a while they both started asking me to just wash their hair for them because they liked the way i did it. the said they felt i got it cleaner than they did and it was relaxing to have someone else do it. they did each others aswell. is that fucked up aswell? or is it just that this is a man?

well, maybe it's this guy's opinion too diddl. just because you don't find it relaxing doesn't mean nobody else does.

Yeah deffo strange, I wouldn't dream of attempting to wash my 11 year old ds's hair, nor would he want me to. I stopped washing it for him as soon as he was able to competently do it himself.

Agree with BitOfFun. 'Infantilising' was exactly the word that sprang to mind when I read the OP.

it's odd

My mum washes my hair regulary but she is a hairdresser

lol

no idea
my friend swears it is easier to wash your face in the sink - carefully washing and rinsing up to the hairline and splashing water everywhere, rather than just soaping and rinsing it in the shower when it;s easy to thoroughly rinse

"well, maybe it's this guy's opinion too diddl. just because you don't find it relaxing doesn't mean nobody else does."

Maybe it is his opinion.

Likewise your opinion of "having your hair washed for you is far more relaxing than doing it yourself" doesn´t hold for everybody.

"Can anyone explain this to me, I'd love to know the reasoning behind it, but don't feel I can ask without revealing I think she's a crazed loon"

Sorry, can´t explain.

But apparently my ILs switch the shower off whilst they soap themselves.

Which I think is er,unusual.

lequeen, i couldn't be faffed with that at all. it would kill my back to wash my hair like that everyday.

I don't know if I'd do it ( DS's are 5 and 1 at the moment) but I don't think it is partcularly weird......I can think of weirder

I don't think it's that weird. Quite unusual probably but I don't see it as particularly weird.

I turn the shower off when I soap myself as it saves water/ gas and means if grubby (I run and cycle, often in mud) the soap doesn't get washed straight off. I also turn the shower off whilst waiting for a 2 minute conditioner to work. To me it's like not leaving the tap running whilst cleaning your teeth, a green, anti-waste thing.

I do like deep hot baths though, so green credentials go out the window then.
Don't get why anyone would wash their hair in sink if they have a shower, unless an occasional thing when they quickly want to wash hair but not get wet all over. My shower is over the bath so easy to bend over bath and do it but I can imagine if only shower unit you have to resort to kettles and sinks, although that sounds more of a fangle than just stripping off and going in the shower.
To me sinks and bowls are a 1970s pre showers in bathrooms thing, although even in the 70s we had a rubber shower attachment that fitted on the taps for hairwashing.

does her hair smell bad? my aunt washes hers once a week but it isn't dirty in between, it is great condition. maybe your MIL should try doing it twice a week.

Some mother and son relationships - particularly only child mother son relationships - are very odd indeed. My husband is an only child and there have been many times over the years when I've felt very uncomfortable with his set up and had to banish it from my mind. Up until he left home in his early 20s seeing his mum naked was quite normal for him. Yuk, yuk, yuk - I soon reeducated him on that point! So no yanbu IMO. It's weird.

see I'm not sure I've got as much as a problem with a son seeing his mother naked (well, not in his twenties ,that is weird). BUt definitely in many cultures it's normal for children to see their parents naked.

I nearly vomited when I heard that in the U.S many plastic surgeons not only operate on their wives (which is sick in itself) but on their mothers

Oh come on - seeing your 50 year old mother starkers when you're 22 is absolutely bizarre. It's totally different if your son is three - not when you are engaged and have graduated from university!

i think it is inappropriate once children reach teens to see their mother and father naked unless it is accidental.

I certainly don't think walking around naked in front of grown up children is a good thing.

It goes both ways, I think. Once a child gets naturally protective of their own privacy around nakedness (around puberty, I guess), then I think it's not very respectful to flaunt your own nudity around them. Accidental bargings in the bathrooms aside.