To not replace something that i havent seen

[Ray81]

We went on holiday back in August and my sister who is 18 looked after my house.
She had a party which she didnt ask to have and evidently one of her friends left a Ipod docking station here.

She asked me for it last week and i told her there was nothing like that in my house (although didnt know what i was looking for tbh). Now i had a real blitz when i got back from hols and was alittle worried i had thrown it out by mistake, i do tend to just go into auto pilot when clearing out. I said to her perhaps i had and thinking it would be £20 or so that i would replace it. I only said that because i couldnt be sure i hadnt thrown it away ifswim. Well she has come back to me saying it is £350 and showing me what it looked like. I havent seen it and have looked ALL over my house.

I havent got that amount of money and i dont think i should replace something that for one i honestly cannot remember seeing and 2 that wasnt my responsibility in the first place.

So AIBU to say NO i am not replacing it. surely if something is that expensive you shouldnt even take it out of your own home and be that careless with it. Whats to say he hasnt left it somewhere else and my house was the last time he could remember seeing it.

Poisonous is the word. And because you are finally standing up for yourself it could get a lot worse. Cut the off, block their numbers, delete them as fb friends. You don't have the energy, ability or strength to stand up to an entire family that seem intent on bullying you to utter misery. Utter bastards.

In fact, calling the police is the best thing as they now know you are unafraid to involve the law. Make sure they know that you know that harassment and defamation are actionable. its worth seeing cab about this so you know what to do if thing get worse.

I haven't read all of this thread but a couple of points spring to mind:

1. Your sis was looking after your house so IMO that means the people she invited to the party were trespassing on your property without your permission.

1. Is there a receipt for the Ipod docking station. I bought one for DS last Christmas from M&S and it cost 59.00 .

1. Did you give the girl keys - should you change the locks.

Sorry you've had to go through all this.

Police could've looked at photos (for usual suspects) and interviewed some of the party-goers, but presumably didn't think it was worth it.

Just remember to change your locks.

TBH i realy dont think they thought i would call the police, i am sure they thought i was lying about it and i would back off once police were threatened and pay for this mystery ipod docking station.

The thing is my dsis has been caught lying a few times, first it was only 5 birds that died but no it was more, then it was only 7 people in my house now it is 11-15 people on both days i dont know what it is going to take for them to back me up. Evidently 3 people brought their ipod docking stations to my house and the friend in question didnt want anyone to touch his but then he left it here for her to use on the sun (doesnt ring true to me).
We have had birds that have died and even if they didnt die because of her the others still hadnt been fed of watered properly and were close to dying when we got home according to DH.

I am going to ring insurers tomorrow to see if we can get anything for the ring, we brought it in a different country 6 yrs ago and dont have the receipt. And see if they will cover the money??
My other sis thinks i should claim on my insurance for his Ipod docking station too what do you guys think?

Thankyou so much for all your advise and support it has realy helped me.

Ray81 - what will it take for you to get angry at your family? Claim for the Ipod speaker on your insurance and you're admitting they were all right and you were wrong and will put up with any shit they dish out to you.

Absolutly NOT.

You cannot say that this was definately in your house. You have had different versions of what type of Dock it was.

This could be argued as Insurance fraud.

"My other sis thinks i should claim on my insurance for his Ipod docking station too"

"What do you guys think?"????

NO!!!

Your insurance would cover your possessions, not those of anyone without your permission to enter your home in the first place.

The docking thing belongs to the friend, the friend claims off their insurance.

Do you have any photos of you wearing the ring? That can help the insurance company look at the claim.

Interesting and very telling that the FB pics have been removed! Your sister is lyin through her teeth. Tell the police everything, let them interview her friends etc, you will get nowhere, but it'll put the fear of god in her.

Then tell her and all those that bullied you on her behalf to Fuck the fuck off.

Hmm Christmas ought to be interesting this year..

no don't claim on the insurance, no no

if it makes you feel better, you could explain all to the insurance company and ask what the response would be

I don't know if this would undermine the claim for your other stuff, but you sound honest and would not lie to an insurance company about people being in your house anyway, so if that undermines your claim then you'd be telling the insurers about it. Maybe other people think differently.

A chat with the insurer might ease your mind -- I suspect it might take some time for them to stop laughing before they say a resounding NO

er re: the docking station thing I mean they'll say no

I hope they stump up for your own, real, losses.

Ray where are you? I think you need a gang of us with rolled up sleeves and rolling pins to give you moral support.

I think your other sister is trying to get you to commit insurance fraud, by the way.

If you were burgled by someone unknown and they later claimed they left something at your house and wanted the money for it... Would you claim insurance on it?

Not quite the same situation but similar IMO!

Do not claim for the docking station. Their property, their resposibility! They did not have permision to be in your house.

Sod the fucking docking station and concentrate on your own stuff.

Rolling pins at the reading girls

Thanks Appletrees I am in the south of england. your all more then welcome to back me up.

I dont think the insurers would cover it either , not only because i have not seen it but because i didnt invite this person into my house in the first place.

I will have a chat with them and tell them the whole story they can then tell me, my policy does cover other peoples stuff in my house upto a certain amount and would cover the supposed cost of the ipod docking station but i would assume only if i allowed it into my house. we will see.

The ring is a difficult one i hardly EVER wore it as i had 2 (lucky me at the time). I am wondering if i could get the bank to go back and confirm the transaction for when it was brought and hopefully the insurers will take that as proof, it was very expensive btw over £2000 worth of ring. But that was 6 yrs ago. Infact i may have the bank statements will have to have a look.

I shall carry a rolled up brolly instead, but with a very fierce look in my eyes

Have I read this right?
Your 'D'Sis had a party in August, as evidenced by photos on her FB. The photos were still there recently.
The photos were discussed on MN and disappeared very soon after.
Are your family reading this thread?

If they are: YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES!

Senua i wouldnt think they are but i have nothing to hide so if they are i hope they know how very hurt and angry i am over this and perhaps will see that IANBU and others agree with me.

I have hardly eaten since i have found my stuff missing and feel sick all of the bloody time.

And just incase they are i will tell you all there is a neckless missing too. This has been reported to police along with everything else. It was a present brought for me by DH yrs ago and is from a place in new york starting with T !!! My family know this too.

It doesnt matter that the photos have disappeared because we saved them to out computer before they did. {smug emotion}

After this thread i may name change as feel i have given quite abit away about myself and dh on here.

still have nothing to hide mind havent said anything on here that i havent in RL

I hope your insurance covers your losses. I don't think, given the lack of co-operation from those mentalists, that you should consider trying to recoup their costs. And please cut yourself off from them.

Well done for speaking with the police.

Do not claim for the docking station on your insurance.

I think you should be stating very clearly that the theft of the docking station has damn all to do with you. You will not therefore be speaking to your insurance company in relation to it.

Even though the insurance company will say no, I think you will be weakening your position if you even suggest that you will speak to them to find out. In effect you will be admitting responsibility for the damn thing if you even make enquiries with the insurance people, iyswim.

What a horrid bunch.

I would tell them that you have reported the matter to the police, and they are making enquiries. I would also very clearly tell them that you are not going to discuss the issue any further, with any of them. And stick to it.

Ray, you sound like such an honest nice person. Strength and vibes my dear.

Totally agree with Beryl - YOU have NO responsibility for the docking station. Please don't even discuss it in a theoretical way with the insurance company as it could undermine your claim if even the slightest whiff of "trying it on" were to be attached to your own legitimate claim. After all, insurance companies always try to pay out as little as they possibly can - don't give them the excuse they need to do this.

And quite aside from that, you will end up losing what little credibility you have with your family if you try to help/compensate your sister's friend in any way as it will reinforce their view of you as someone who can be bullied and manipulated into doing what they demand ... thus setting yourself up for future issues like this. The dock is your sister's responsibility ... it may well have existed but remember you only have her version of events about what happened to it. Someone else could have stolen it, or indeed it could have been taken home safe and sound by its rightful owner (who's oblivious to all this drama) but has been seized upon as a diversionary tactic by your sister either to take the heat off her for her overall irresponsibility and/or she wants £350 for some reason and is pulling a fast one. Going to the police was about you asserting yourself and showing you wouldn't be pushed about or have you/your DH accused of theft - trying to rectify the dock "situation" will effectively damage that advantage. Your family need to see they can't push you about any more.

Yes I agree, don't mention it at all. It was just an idea and not a very good one from me.

please don't claim for the docking station, its not your responsibility. I don't understand why the owner hasn't claimed on their flippin insurance? I'd be inclined to bill your wonderful party throwing sister for cleaning, if I knew total strangers had been in my house with shoes on the furniture, I'd want the house cleaned at the least, how disrespectful. whats the going rate for party venues these days?
I hope your family do read this and realise what a bunch of C*nts they are being!

If you start talking to your insurance company about the docking station, you are effectively saying that it was in your house and you are accepting some responsibility for it. Neither of these things is true. Don't let your family bully you. They are obviously used to having you back down as soon as they gang up on you and so now that you are pushing back, they're upping the pressure. They're very worried that the family scapegoat isn't going to take their crap anymore. Don't give in.

FFS i have just had a text from my Dsis saying her friend needs my police reference number to link the statements together and my insurance details "or are you going to replace the docking station".

I am sooooooooooooooooooo angry that i havent even bothered to reply at the moment. Jesus why the hell should i cover this fucking ipod docking station when i havent even fucking seen it.

I may reply saying "yeah i;ll replace it when you replace my ring neckless and money".