"Hot liquid will burn."

[ChristmasTrulyReigns]

Will it?

Will it?

Will it?

WILL IT?

Who knew a visit to the loo on Sebenhams could raise my temperature so much?

Gah.

It will scald.

Shoe boxes avg contents 2 - did you know that most people have more than the average (mean) number of feet?

We once bought some fairy lights that said on the box: for indoor or outdoor use only.

that's to stop people pinning them to the inside of the doorframe.

Morrison's tomato puree. Picture of a whole tomato on the front of the box, in small letters the words "serving suggestion".
Eh? How do I make a whole tomato complete with stalk and skin from tomato puree.

It may have changed now, I hope so because it drove me bonkers. I did email them to ask if they could provide me with a recipe for making a tomato.

I was going to say something like that Grimma - but you said it much more eloquently

My favourite on the back of a coach "No job to big, no job to far"

Sadly no photo as I was driving.

Danger water,
on the concrete at the edge of the lake in Victoria park London

A huge poster outside McDonald advertising donuts with the disclaimer 'not actual size'.

Really - you mean I can't buy a donut larger than my head for 59p?

Saw <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=2.bp.blogspot.com/_sqvVxZecDxo/SunkStyEkWI/AAAAAAAAAIk/SUi4CI-l9k0/s320/stupid%2Bwarning%2Bsign.jpg&imgrefurl=pastorrudytlc.blogspot.com/2009/10/warning-labels-and-life-signs.html&h=300&w=298&sz=25&tbnid=KmAIO8MpGlD6IM:&tbnh=116&tbnw=115&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dstupid%2Bwarning%2Bsigns&zoom=1&q=stupid+warning+signs&usg=__DXR-DgG-J0YGboFzXjIVJ9e0VMU=&sa=X&ei=ud74TL-gNMaZhQepr7SoCQ&ved=0CCUQ9QEwAw" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this and Laughed out loud

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.innocentenglish.com/funny-pics/funny-pics/funny-no-warning-sign.jpg&imgrefurl=www.innocentenglish.com/funny-bloopers-mistakes-quotes/funny-signs-pictures.html&usg=__55AzQFkuBKbuD8oxFzYNGkiTVc8=&h=261&w=400&sz=64&hl=en&start=21&zoom=1&tbnid=QyIMqiSlX_M13M:&tbnh=130&tbnw=182&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dstupid%2Bwarning%2Bsigns%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1366%26bih%3D653%26tbs%3Disch:10,511&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=701&vpy=141&dur=1863&hovh=181&hovw=278&tx=145&ty=109&ei=YN_4TJeGMoWFhQeT88GhCQ&oei=I9_4TNm9LMexhQeN6uHuCA&esq=2&page=2&ndsp=21&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:21&biw=1366&bih=653" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">and this

"Poshpaws Fri 12-Nov-10 13:43:22
Bought DS3 a poster with Disney 'Cars' characters on it and there was a warning on it saying that it was not suitable for under 3s because the small parts could cause a choking incident.

It was a flat poster to go on the wall .
"

I've seen things like this and always assumed it is because they could rip bits off and choke on them. Highly unlikely I agree, but I think that's what they mean.

And all the estate agency property details that say:

Bathroom with obscure windows

"you mean I can't buy a donut larger than my head for 59p?"

PMSL

The packaging on my chinchillas food (which is basically glorified hamster food!) now has a huge sticker saying '100% vegetarian' on it. Really? I thought they loved meat

Warning! No swimming: deep water!

loved the no diving and not suitable for under 3s sticker on the birthing pool too - what exactly do they think it'll be used for

I noticed the other day that one of the precautions on teething gel is "consult a doctor if you are pregnant or breastfeeding". Is that commonly a problem with teething babies?

OTOH, my DD laughed at the 'Danger - Shallow Water' signs by the pond in the park until I explained.

Having grown up on a coast with breakwaters, I know that one isn't funny.

we have "warning: cameras operate in this hospital"

how very modern

I had a baby hat with the label "Age 3-6 months, not suitable for under 3s due to small parts"

not suitable for under 3 years obviously. Can't type today.

I presumed you were irritated at the use of 'will' as opposed to 'might' or 'could' rather than 'burn' instead of 'scald' .

Label on habitat bathmat-' do not use in wet areas'

My all time favourite was one we saw by the side of the road in Essex.

It was a generic warning triangle with exclamation mark and underneath it said

BADGERS

Couldn't believe my eyes, we had to go back for a second look.

What kind of scary ass wildlife to they have in Essex? It was near a nuclear reactor mind.