to think women taking

[waterbaby100]

their husbands surname when they get married is a completely outdated, archaic practice?

yama - I did have a choice - no-one forced me to change my name.

well I didn't have any pressure, I wanted to , to me it was all tied up in starting anew life with DH. I liked changing it.

I chose to take my husbands name rather than keep my fathers name. When I got married I wanted to be a new unit - my husband and I and now the DC's. Sometimes getting away from the name you are born with is very handy.

The way I see it, there are lots of choices when you get married. Woman changes her name, man changes his name, both change names, neither change names. My husband and I made the decision that was right for us. My cousin and her husband were going to merge both their surnames into something new, which I think is a really lovely idea - new name for a new family unit.

But that's an interesting assumption - why do people assume that the children with automatically have the father's name?

I had no problem whatsoever taking dh's name when we married. We are a family unit and share a surname.

What I struggle a bit with is women who keep their own surnames but give their children their husband's/partner's surname. If I hadn't changed my surname my children would have had my surname and not dh's.

Meh, I swapped my father's name for my husband's. Didn't have to, but wanted to. Don't see the issue tbh.

god my maiden name with my married name would have been absolutely hideous - think something along the lines of a surname equivalent of

Simbarashe-Henry or Vladimir-John (only worse LOL)

I kept my name as it just struck me as very bizarre to change it.

DH said if we'd ever have had natural children of our own then he wanted to change his name to mine so we'd all have the same name (as my surname is nicer than his ) and it would have made him a famous racing driver

I couldn't be bothered to change my name. I mean it's acutally a lot of effort. Why bother?

maybe children's surnames should go down the matriarchal line? After all - you're never really sure of paternity....

I find it on when newsreaders for example, or women in the public eye change their surname. Not sure why?

saffy85 - i assume you've told him?

what chicken said.

modern life = choice.

Just out of interest, when women keep their own name when they marry, what title do they use?

odd

I regret it in some ways. DD had my name before we married so it wasn't that, i just already had major IL issues and didn't want anymore and just went with tradition. I want my name back!

wubbly - I don't recall it being any major effort - I think I changed the last bit of documentation 6yrs into my marriage (and that was my passport which was due to expire and I needed to renew it for a booked holiday so would have had to be re-done regardless)

I wanted to take my husband's name because I want everyone to know I am married to him. I also didn't want double-barrelled children!

YABVU and I don't understand why what other women choose to do has anything to do with you tbh.

I took my hasbands surname but double barrelled with my own for school and official stuff, however I use my own for everything else.

The double barrelled thing is a PITA especially on the phone!!

I have to confess that my maiden name is still on every bit of official documentation I own. This is because I am too bone idle to be arsed with the paperwork to change it. I am so thankful for chip and pin

Don't you have to send off your marriage certificate to all and sundry? Get new bank cards/drivers license and stuff?

Not difficult no, but a waste of time, for me anyway.

YABU - though if you had posted this on the Feminist board you might have got different responses.

So Stubbornhubby, if your wife had said that she would like the children to have her surname, would you have changed yours so you could share a surname with them?

nobiggy, I was a Ms before and still am.

i never took my first husband's surname. much to his annoyance. it spoke volumes as i never really wanted to get married, so certainly didn't want his name the useless twat we split up less than a year after marrying. it was a joke of a marriage. me and my friends call it my "ill fated, short lived marriage" :o

i am marrying my new dp soon and will be damn proud to take his name, in fact i can't wait. me him and dd will all have the same surname and the only thing that makes me sad is that DS wont. (he is from aforementioned marriage)

but saying that, its entirely up to the individual, as long as its for the right reasons whatever you do.

YABU

my Dhs surname is less crappy than my Dads...

Nobiggy - I use Ms, just like I did before I was married.