To bloody well send them to a hotel?

[Tinalovestuna]

In laws arrived 1/2 hour ago for planned weeks stay. Unbeknown to me or dh, fil has norovirus. He said he has been vomiting and has diarrhoea since 3am.

We have a 7 week old baby who has a cold.

I am so fucking livid at how stupid they are. Me and dh have just had a massive row in the bedroom because I think they should go and stay in a hotel, I don't want my baby infected.

Dh said I am being totally unfair as they have driven down to see the baby.

I said I would pay for a hotel.

Nah he'd been D&V since 3am, he wasn't a bit off he was properly sick. All three of them have behaved like utter cunts and should be treated as such.

maryz - I'd feel a lot more sympathy for the ILs if FIL hadn't had D&V since 3am. He wasn't feeling a bit off, he was ill and both he and MIL knew it well before they left home.

tinalovestuna - glad you got out and fingers crossed you and your DS stay well. You might want to give NHS a call - I know they get a knocking sometimes but they were very helpful when DH had shingles re. how the virus is transmitted, how long it can survive on surfaces and what disinfection procedures I needed to take to try and stop DD catching it. The lady I talked to went didn't know and didn't have immediate access to the data so went off an tracked down the latest research to make sure she was giving me current information. It would be worth checking how concerned you need to be, which might necessitate getting the bug identified so that you can handle any required disinfection appropriately - is your GP good on stuff like this? Having gone to the trouble to take you DS out of harms way it seems sensible to take every precaution to make sure it was worth while.

:( and you've been put in this position.

I changed for the Jilly Cooper thread and cba to change back now, besides I'm rather hoping for some JCish stuff to happen in my life [tongue lolling out emoticon]

I hope you and your baby continue to be fine and have a lovely week with your Mum.

A little off MaryZ? It is more then a little off.

I've just had norovirus and it's fucking horrible. YASNBU, can't believe they came to visit a new baby with norovirus,

Just caught up on this. Glad you are okay thus far tuna. Silver lining is obviously that you get to spend a while with your mum (how lovely :)).

I agree with the mob, PIL must pay for the cleaning. And they wouldn't be in my house again for a very long time. At the very least, they owe you a massive apology. They should be down on their knees begging you to forgive them for their blatant stupidity and selfishness. I don't care how much they wanted to see your LO, they were morons.

Have a lovely time with your mum and keep us updated with what happens!

If it is any consolation to you, ds1 came down with the noro virus at the same time as I went into labour with dd. A few days later and ds2 had it, then dh caught it. A week after that ds2 became sick again and ended up in hospital on a drip for 2 days. He had the rota virus which he then gave to ds1 who was only a little ill...

neither I nor dd (who by the time we had finished being plague central was 2 weeks old) caught anything despite being in the room with ds2 when he had the rota virus and was throwing everything up over and over.

i know if this was me and my pil, they would be absolutely spitting feathers (is that the right saying?) for not only missing out on seeing the baby themselves but also for essentially giving my mum a bonus week of spending time with him!

These "don't make a fuss it's only a flesh wound just get on with it" type of people tend to cause other people huge amounts of inconvenience and hassle, as evidenced by SIL's fall and O)P's flight from her own home.

Morons.

So true georgimama, I once worked in a very enlightened office which, because of the way the (rather elderly) air conditioning was configured, insisted that anyone harbouring a cold or any other ailment did NOT come into work.

Everyone stuck to it (well you would, wouldn't you lol) and I think they actually saved money because nobody passed their germs round and caused mass office sickness.

Ah glad to hear you' and baby are ok tuna :)

Worrying this is I could see my ILs doing the same. Once they've arranged something nothing will stop them from doing it. I could see them not realising how severe and contagious the illness would be, or how bad it would be to expose a newborn.

Utter madness. I had a norovirus once some years ago (mine started in the small hours of the morning too, as they always seem to).

I spend 5-6 hours that night sitting on the loo whilst simultaneously vomiting in the sink next to me. By morning, I felt almost unconscious with exhaustion and lack of fluids, and had to crawl back to bed. Couldn't even keep down the tiniest sips of water for another day or two.

Obviously that was the extremely rare weekend that hubby was away on a work trip, so I also had to deal with the kids. The only plus side was that only one of them came down with it afterwards, and he was 8, at least old enough to make it to the loo to vomit.

But truly, truly awful. And with a 7 week old - doesn't bear thinking about.

Sometimes, PIL appear to be on another planet. A few years ago my MIL turned up on the doorstep (an hours drive away) with christmas presents loudly bemoaning the fact FIL had been sufferieng from D&V for 2 days and she was feeling off colour herself but felt she should bring the xmas presents. I stood n doorway horrified as it was 3 days before christmas and the last thing I wanted was ds's ill or myself! Ds's appeared in hallway and I stood between them and MIl as she tried to kiss them saying 'I think it's best not to kiss.....in the circumstances.' I was seen as being precious although MILstarted vomiting that night at home and was ill for a few days. I still can;t believe she went to kiss children when she had just stated she felt off colour!

A couple of years later same thing happened only this time I tol DH I would pop over to collect presents, MIL answered door ashen faced, house stand of sick (she was expecting me) I dropped off gifts, grabbed ours and tried to make a wuick getaway but she was on my heels back out to the car, opening car doors to kiss DS's!!! I had already told DS's not to let Grandmas kiss tham if she tried (!) So thankfully they both eeked 'Don't kiss up grandma! We dont want your germs!'

My PIL had planned to come last weekend but they both came down with flu (or maybe just very bad colds) so cancelled it. I was very appreciative as DS2 suffers from asthma that gets very bad whenever he gets a cold so would prefer not to deliberately expose him if i can avoid it.

Your PIL should have phoned and cancelled then shut themselves away for a couple of days, grr.

Definitely to phone and cancel.

It's the other way round here.

It's the ILs who are insulin-dependent diabetics with heart conditions and hypertension.

And we stay with SIL who has an 8-month-old baby.

Any hint of cold or bugs and we don't go through to visit, although it means a month and a half till we can visit again as DH works weekends and has to plan time off then way in advance.

But it's just courtesy for your family and others.

A bug the children, now nearly 2, nearly 5 and 7, would throw off in little time could lay them very, very low for months or worse.

Ditto my folks. We plan to visit them in summer when there's less of a chance of the wee ones being ill. They have heart disease and hypertension (dad) and COPD, asthma (mum).

It's just decency and consideration.

My FIL can be abit of an old bore but wouldnt visit his first newborn grandchild for 2 weeks because he had a mild cold. He couldnt bear the thought that he could possibly pass anything on.

Au contraire, Paisley Pumpkin, I think she should definitely fall out with her inlaws if this is the kind of shit (literally!!) they pull.

They won't go? They are puking and shitting in your house when you have a teeny tiny baby and and they won't go?

Not worth being civil to in my book.

I'm just reading this rather shocked for you OP. I'd definately refuse to return until the whole house has been scrubbed, and pay a professional in your DH isn't up to it. Can you leave your DC with your DB so you can go round and inspect the level of cleanliness first?

Also, when they leave, I'd be telling DH to tell them they are no longer welcome to stay, ever.

Remember being hurt that FIL didn't "want to see the baby because he had a cold" How lucky am I?

Good for you tinalovestuna hope both you and baby remain well hope ur PIL do realise how stupid they've been and stump up 4 cleaning etc that way they've a future visiting again sometime. Have fab time with ur mum and hope to make PILs jealous!

You've every right 2 b angry with ur DH but forgive him with even the slightest olive branch cos he was stuck in the middle.

Please come back in a couple of days, OP, and let us know you haven't come down with it.

I would be having a very blunt talk indeed with the PIL - along the lines of, "Do you realise that babies die of diarrhoea and vomitting? What kind of person would wilfully expose a child to that kind of risk? And how good would it be for me, or for my feeding the baby if I got ill? Can you promise me that you will never be this thoughtless ever again - because if you can't, then I will not be trusting you in my house or near my baby for a verym very long time!!"

But then I am a stroppy mare!

Darn, that should be very,, not verym. It is too late for me to be in charge of a keyboard so I am off to bed!
G'night all.