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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Paying for Sex?

91 replies

Dione · 24/09/2010 00:17

I have been celebate for more than 2.5years. Every now and then I want sex (sorry to be blunt), but I want really good sex. That rules out one night stands. I do not want a relationship, I don't even want to share the taxi home.

AIBU to (when I have the money) pay for guaranteed satisfaction and think that the money I paid means I am not responsible for anyone else's feelings?

OP posts:
Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:22

Yabu. I find it disgusting and morally bereft.
But that's just me

nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:27

I've had really good sex from one night stands?

BlackBess · 24/09/2010 00:27

Have you considered wanking? Sex rarely lives up to a really good wank.

Anyone know a better word for wanking? It doesnt really fit does it?

Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:28

The kitkat shuffle?

nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:28

I wouldnt pay for sex, but I'm just stingy, I struggle to let myself pay for anything Grin

Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:29

Hear that nattiecake- I just sucked my teeth at paying 5 quid for net curtains

BlackBess · 24/09/2010 00:30

Nah, kitkats remind me of a girl in school who had really bad blackheads and smelt of wee. She was always licking the chocolate off kitkats, put me right off

Saltatrix · 24/09/2010 00:35

Hi Dione I saw you post this:

"I would like to ask: I've thought of going to a prostitute. Have been without sex for over 2.5years and don't want a relationship. Have thought of having a one night stand and I don't want to deal with it if he's disappointing or give my number and there is no way I want him in my house the next day.

Am I really a bad person to consider paying for sex when that's all I want?"

You seem to give the impression of being a woman as your looking for a 'him'. Unless of course you are gay.

Original poster
Dione · 24/09/2010 00:37

Considered wanking? Please, how do you think that I've gotten this far?

I've only had one ONS and it was exciting but less than satisfying. Hedge why do you think that it's morally bereft, if both parties know the score from the off, what do you think is wrong?

Maybe I just want the satisfaction along with being held by a man and not giving anything (but money by prearrangement) in return.

The truth is I have nothing to give and nothing I want to give, but I would like a bit of howsyerfather.

Am I wrong?

OP posts:
Original poster
Dione · 24/09/2010 00:38

Saltatrix, yes I am a woman. A mother of one.

OP posts:
Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:38

Bess ewwwww! There's one in every school- ours used to flap her legs and had hairy feet and smelt of fish

Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:39

Do you really want a prostitute onthe same house as your kid?

Hedgeblunder · 24/09/2010 00:41

I think so yes dionne, I think that the people doing such a profession are often very sad, and have no respect for themselves, I don't think encouraging a situation like that is a good idea. I'm sure I'll get a bollocking but it's just how I feel about it.

Saltatrix · 24/09/2010 00:42

I don't know this is odd 2.5 years is a long time but I really don't like the thought of people sleeping with others whilst in a relationship without the others knowledge.

I suppose the first question is have you discussed this with your partner? about the lack of sex in your relationship. If he accepts there is a problem then maybe you can both come to a mutual agreement this works for some people.

nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:42

I agree with prostitution in theory Dione, so I wouldnt judge you for paying someone for sex any more than for paying for a haircut :)

nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:43

Sorry, I'm assuming you dont have a partner, bbut Saltatrix mentions one??

wukter · 24/09/2010 00:44

How original.
This is the first time the topic of prostition has come up on mN.

It's like buses...

Original poster
Dione · 24/09/2010 00:46

OMG No. I would go to cheap hotel. But you see that is the thing. I don't have much money. In order to do this I know I have to budget and plan for at least 2 months (probably why I haven't done it yet).

I would like some and I want it to be good but I'm torn. Suppose I'm just throwing a passing thought (quite a few times, if I'm honest) out there for feedback. Has anyone used a male escort?

OP posts:
Saltatrix · 24/09/2010 00:47

I misread another of her posts if no partner then the decision is all yours.

Original poster
Dione · 24/09/2010 00:48

I don't have a partner. I left him more than two years ago and am getting a divorce.

OP posts:
nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:48

Still favouring a one night stand just for the cost-saving though... Grin Can still take him to a cheap motel, but if youre lucky he might even pay.

I am such a scrooge!!

Saltatrix · 24/09/2010 00:49

There is not much of a market of straight male escorts although I am sure there are a few out there. Normally because when it comes to obtaining sex if that's what a woman is looking for then it's unlikely she would have trouble getting it.

nattiecake · 24/09/2010 00:49

(I'd also rather get my hair cut for free)

Saltatrix · 24/09/2010 00:50

for

Original poster
Dione · 24/09/2010 00:53

Nattiecake, if I were younger I would probably do what you suggest. But I'm nearly 40 and I know that ONSs tend to only want their own satisfaction (unless things have changed from my early 20s). Anyway, I don't really like bars. When I have the money I like to go to really nice restaurants. And stuff my face Grin.

OP posts: