to go straight to the Head about my concerns about HER?

[thedollyridesout]

DD has had a great first week at middle school, until this afternoon anyway. She came home off the bus very upset having been 'told off' by the Headmistress - let's call her Mrs Smith.

DD said that Mrs Smith shouted at her for pulling a face at a boy who got up and changed seats rather than have DD sit next to him. DD was not aware that she had done this until Mrs Smith bellowed at her something along the lines of 'you do not do that to another person young lady'.

DD was confused and mortified in equal measure. She feels that Mrs Smith was wrong to have spoken to her that way and the whole incident has tarnished her experience of her new school.

She can take very little pleasure in being Star of the Week or in breaking the Y5 long jump record and she certainly won't be striving for an award from the Headmistress. She would however accept an apology.

So am I mad to go and speak to the Headmistress about this? I would really appreciate some advice on how to handle things.

This is mad.

I don't know why I'm so invested in this

We ALL hated our HT as kids - didn't you?

It was normal

Anyway - NO, We're not saying that we're saying that YOU have to take the lead, and realise that this was NOTHING. NOTHING dolly. Jesus.

I never know why parents want to set themselves up as the staffroom joke -and the parent that staff to avoid! It is in your DC interests to have a friendly relationship-don't jeopardise it with a trivial happening-keep it for something that matters or you will be like the 'boy who cried wolf'.

Why would she think the head was horrible? DD made a face and got told off. You must tell your DD off sometimes. She surely doesn't think you are horrid. These things happen.

Oh ffs.

She's not their mate, she's the HT.

Who cares if they think she's horrible?

Their opinion on her only matters 10 years from now and more, when they will have the emotional intelligence and the life experience to assess whether "horrible Mrs Beans" was actually a bloody good thing, or not.

So you'd rather she was the HT pet?? Loves the HT and HT LOVES her. Will that help her become popular and people wanting to sit on the bus with her??

So Mrs Smith is horrible - she isn't there to be popular shes there to run a school and if disiplining makes her unpopular I doubt she'll lose any sleep over it.
Are you expecting DD to become a crusader for the LOVE MRS SMITH CLUB

How do you recall an email? What about an answer phone message .

Nooooooooooooooooooooo

Shirley - I'm so glad you've invested, as I've really enjoyed your contributions . This is my fav thread of the week. Well done Dolly for moving forward. The trouble is, after this thread, you're going to feel worse than DD . (Perhaps you could forward an email to the head linking to this thread - only joking)

I feel sorry for the Head.

I'm reverting to wind-up. Especially as OP claims to be a teacher herself.

Honestly, she just needs to go in on Monday as usual, & get on with her day.

Mrs Smith will have other stuff to be getting on with. It is appropriate for a teacher to scold a child who behaves badly or rudely. The child is not required to provide feedback.

I'd imagine she can live with your dd thinking her horrible!

Or if and when she emails / rings admit YOU were emotional as DD was and think that you need to let go a bit - THEN the HT will respect YOU.

Have a few glasses of wine and a good old shag, you sound quite uptight Dolly.

A big thank you to all of you for helping me to get my head straight. Luckily I have only told one friend about it but I also told her that I would be seeking the combined wisdom of MN .

Goodnight to you all, and don't worry, DD will be just fine, well she will, as long as she finds her jumper.

How do you recall an email? What about an answer phone message

Oh, this is definitely a wind-up... no doubt about it.

Know what, teachers make mistakes. Hear hear. We're only human after all.

listens to Daft Punk a little too much

I'm afraid you probably don't have the full story.My child has selective memory when it comes to recounting events like this and strangely, it's never his fault! Life is unfair..and so even if you feel that this is harsh for her, I think you'd be better off trying to teach her how to handle unfair situations. That's what I do anyhow. Good luck.

Bloody school jumpers going missing, tis a whole nother thread

What is middle school?

Where Frodo went to learn stuff.

Quick LOL re school jumper for a bit of light relief.

DS comes home wearing filthy jumper Monday so wash it. Tuesdays filthy jumper gets washed Tuesday and Wedsnesday wears Mondays clean one. Comes home Thursday with 2 filthy jumpers Weds filthy one is in the wash basket.

Couldn't work out why I had 4 jumpers when he owns 3. Turns out the only clean one left - the one I washed Tuesday that he came home in belongs to someone else and has their name in it. So DS went to school today in the least of the dirty ones that are his and took in the lovely washed one for his friend - hope his mum is grateful!!!

OP-please don't worry about the message you sent the HT.She is probably a parent herself or at least undertands and has seen many times before parents' knee jerk reactions.

(Have you actually met teh HT yet.I only ask because my DS kept going on about this 'old dragon' of a physics teacher.WhenI met her she was a giggling girl of about 22)

brass

Brux, LOL my precious

'dd will be alright, well she will aslong as she finds her jumper'

glad that's sorted then