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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be very upset by friend demanding something back given to me 15 years ago??

555 replies

rockinhippy · 08/09/2010 11:39

I'll try not to ramble, but already feeling ill & now very upset, so excuse me if I do....I would apreciate opinions as to whether or not I am being unreasonable in, a being upset, & b, refusing.

Some 16 odd years ago, probably much more, ........my friend ...(who is one of my DDs 2 GodMums) gave me a vintage astrakan coat, passed to her by her uncle, but not her style at all, but very much mine..........she said at the time something along the lines of "if you change your mind & don't wear it, or want it in future, don't get rid of it, but let me have it back, maybe I'll keep it or pass it on"

Now I love this coat, repaired the lining & keep it for winter going out for special occasions & have looked after it well, so its still in as new condition

the other day I recieved an e-mail, telling me her DD now 17 had been looking through old family photos, & has fell in love with this coat...& wondered if I still had it & was it used..& could she have it back....at first I was confused & thought she meant a 1 she had passed over to my DD....

e-mail yesterday clarified what she meant....so I replied saying, yes, I still love it & wear it with pride & even included a recent photo (we don't live close to each other anymore)

Just now recieved a reply along the lines of....

Sadly DD feels just as strongly about the coat & DD takes precedence over friend, will be popping down to your town next Monday I will collect it then Shock

Confused
OP posts:
browneyesblue · 15/09/2010 09:39

Much as I don't want to get everyone started again, I can't help but risk it Grin

A suspiciously similar sounding question is about to be discussed on the Wright Stuff...

thefirstmrsDeVere · 15/09/2010 09:41

Yes I just logged on to wave a cheery good morning to Mr Wright's researchers.

How odd, he hates MNs so much too Hmm

browneyesblue · 15/09/2010 09:47

I bet he loves us really. He may have originally come to look down on MN, but I bet he stayed for the gossip, scandal and outrage - much like the rest of us Wink

LouMacca · 15/09/2010 10:33

Ooh this should be interesting.

So funny that this classic thread has reared its head again! Grin

Mowiol · 15/09/2010 12:00

Some of you really do need to consider writing comedy sketches ROFLMAO

Suda · 15/09/2010 15:54

(faint voice) ....hello ??

Who's Mr Wright?-oh goodee another character.

Let me take your coat Mr Wright. [evilGrin}

Bobthebreadcrust · 15/09/2010 16:07

oh what a lot of fuss!

Just tell her you assume she is joking and there is no way you can give it back as you thought it was given to you 16 years ago and now consider it your own and wear it all the time. If however it was lent to you, would she consider reimbursing you for drycleaning and new lining costs? And I am serious, as it will not be the same coat you are returning.

If a friend asked this after 16 years (good grief!) I would side with keeping the coat and tell her that.

Seriously!

MayorNaze · 15/09/2010 16:44

oh blimey

that's half an hour of my life i will never get back

never mind classics, isn't style and beauty the place to move this to?

Suda · 15/09/2010 18:35

Well hello Mayor - yes what a good idea - lets move somewhere else.
No no - you go on ahead - I'll borrow indefinitely/ steal fetch your coat
{Echoey Vincent Price/Thriller type laugh can be heard in background GrinGrinGrin }

QS · 15/09/2010 18:38

This cant be in classics. It is not funny, only annoying.

Suda · 15/09/2010 18:59

QS has spoken

Apologies to all other 535 posters but this thread has been dictatoriallyofficially categorised as annoying and not funny. so all you ROFL posters { and you know who you are! ) get up and pull yourselves together.

paisleyleaf · 15/09/2010 19:02
Grin
Suda · 15/09/2010 19:08

*paisleyleaf - what have I just told you !!

QS · 15/09/2010 19:10

Yeah, stop smiling. My word is law.

It is a little bit like

paisleyleaf · 15/09/2010 19:10
Blush
nameymcnamechange · 15/09/2010 19:11

Agree with QS. Although I don't think there's any chance this will go in classics will it? Its too grumpy and bad-tempered for that. The subject matter is all about graspiness and meanness too - nothing classic about that, I don't think.

Suda · 15/09/2010 20:18

Well I agree with paisleys Grin - I disagree with namey ('grumpy , badtempered' eh?) and I'm not scared of you QS !

(runs)

BonzoDooDah · 16/09/2010 13:05

Well if this thread is not good enough for AIBU and should be moved to "Style and Beauty" (heavy quotation marks) then I nominate it to also be moved into

Relationships
Bullying
Arts and crafts
Classifieds
Pets
Ethical Living
Philosophy
In the News
and Adult Fiction

Suda · 16/09/2010 18:04

Marvellous idea Bonzo.

What you all waiting for then ? - come on get your coats. Grin Grin

alicet · 16/09/2010 20:53

Can't believe I have just read the whole thread!!!

So basically the coat you have isn't the one she gave you? Do I have that right?

Its clear then. TTFO. You don't have the original coat anymore. She has no claim on this one at all (and I am in the camp that the original coat was a gift so she had no claim on it anyway).

Summerbird73 · 16/09/2010 21:53

OMFG i have just wasted the last hour reading this Hmm

rockinhippy · 17/09/2010 21:59

Shock this is STILL running Shock

Bonzo you missed the "health" section, as I was ill when it all kicked off & she started harrassing me Wink

& yes alicet thats basically it & I HAVE told her to swivel, the replies here all got WAY too confusing & very surreal Smile,

so rather than take council here, I decided to go back to the old...."now what would SHE (now ex friend) do if the tables where turned"........& I know for fact she wouldn't of given it a second thought, & would of told me to P right off straight away.........based on her doing the self same thing to someone who was kind enough to loaned her their 4 bed house whilst they worked abroad...........took a long court case to get her out........so even if it had been, the same coat & a loan, (which it wasn't).......maybe its a bit of Karma anyway ;)

OP posts:
Suda · 18/09/2010 12:47

Rockin - she sounds lovely - who needs a friend like that Confused. Hope you are feeling much better now.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 18/09/2010 19:54

What was her response when you told her to swivel?

[unable to let it lie emoticon]Blush

AgentZigzag · 18/09/2010 21:20

While you're here rockin, how do you feel your thread went? I bet you're sick of that blasted coat now aren't you? Grin

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