Not Really AIBU but amusing twist on old favourite: Disabled/Baby Change Loos

[QueenSconetta]

I know its quite a regular topic here, and I myself have moaned complained whined discussed parents using a disabled toilets with their children.

The other day I was a supermarket in a different town and was quite amused to see all the old ladies going into the baby change room cos it was big enough to fit their trollies in! I did wonder how they got on with using the mini toilet though

One can never win this one me thinks.

Angel - I would write to the manager and threaten them with the DDA.

I might also consider writing a note to the other mother in which you were very nice and reasonable but just explained the situation and that your son was having to change under a towel in his wheelchair in a corridor. Then next time you see her, just say as nicely as you can "I know we've spoken about this before; but please would you just take the time to read this and see if you can understand where I'm coming from"

You shouldn't have to do either of those things, of course. But they might help...

SGM that is totally crap and against the rules. It shouldn't be a fight, it should simply be a right. Fwiw, I've only ever seen quick and polite moving around the moment a wheelchair user starts to enter the bus. If somebody refused to fold a buggy I would say something or have a go at the driver. I have a go at drivers quite a lot on other issues.

Pag, yes it's true I'm a quick pee-er :) Also, I am blessed with the ability to wait until I get home if I need to do er, anything else. I know not everybody is like me of course. I can't poo in a public place and would go home with a sore tummy rather than try, I'm odd I know.

So yes, my usage of any toilet is quick and minimal.

The thing is, the disabled loo may well be out of action for quite some time if there was a disabled person using it, particularly if somebody was seeing to the needs of a disabled child, which I imagine can take a bit of time.

So isn't it generally the case that if the loo was needed instantly then that may not be possible, due to the needs of another disabled person who got there first?

Angel- that really is terrible, especially when the mother knows and has been told that a disabled person needs to use the facility at that time. She is therefore deliberately and knowlingly stopping a disabled person from using disabled facilities and that is wrong. I don't think anyone on here would think she is in the right.

sure morris

But if I have to abandon my afternoon in town with DS2 and DD because someone really really needs the loo I can live with that - they were having a challenging day too.

But if I have to go home again, with all the inconvenience and disappointment that that entails for all of us just because someone couldn't be arsed to wait... well that idea feels a bit different.

I was on the bus this morning and there was a lady with a buggy (she folded it), a man with one of those three wheeled walking stick thingies, a young man with crutches and two old ladies who looked as though a breeze would knock them over.

I sat at the back and watched the seat shuffling with some amusement, each person obviously thinking 'ffs I need this seat!'. But all being achingly polite and correct about letting others sit down - that's my Edinburgh :)

They all got a seat.

Dandy, which valid points were you agreeing with?

"and the other side thinks there is a moral case that these toilets should never be used by anyone other than the extremely needy, whether that is disabled needs, other health and mental needs or parenting needs"

I am saying, should not be used, if there are other facilities available to you.

Chip point about a cafe only having one facility available and asked are we saying that only disabled people should use it. The answer was of course not.

As you will see from the thread a lady it was impossible for her to get her double buggy into the facilities that were available to her and so she used the disabled toilets and everyone on the thread agreed.

A moral choice when you have the option of using the disabled toilet, when it would not be impossible for you to use the other facilities.

As i said earlier it has been a case of "why shouldnt i use the disabled toilet" on this thread, not "its impossible for me to use the other facilities"

I have decided to give it until half term and see if the other family move groups or days then. If they do it should resolve the problem.
If not then I will approach the DDA and the local papers too because it is utterly infuriating each week.

Good lucl!

I agreed with pretty much everything Chip and MorrisZapp said.

"A moral choice when you have the option of using the disabled toilet, when it would not be impossible for you to use the other facilities."

Depends how desperate you are for the loo, isn't it? Of course most people can queue and do queue. But it's not a moral crime if you're busting, to quickly use an accessible toilet, no other being available. But they should not be used as a convenient convenience either.

I give up.