to find it a little bit pathetic when grown women say they won't drive long distances

[emkana]

of more than 30 (!) miles because they are scared of the driving and navigating.

Is it really that hard, am I missing something here?

Do you think some women are conditioned to think that can't drive well by either men, their parents or society as a whole? I know some who seemed to have been talked into that view.

I am happy to drive long distances, in cities or the country alone and with dc or other passengers. However I do generally make/ let drive when we are together because 1. He doesn't map read or give directions well, 2. He doesn't see to dc properly and 3. I prefer to be passenger if given the chance as lazy.

However I do have the rule that if I am driving back from a party I will damn well drive on the way there too. (although I rarely drive back as dislike a passenger who has been drinking. Plus I get tired and would rather go on public transport.) also would not pick someone up and move over to let them drive.

Don't know why it affects women more-I have always forced myself to drive when it has been necessary. I suppose as I get older I can avoid long trips and take the train-so perhaps avoidance breeds more fear. Don't know if men just don't admit to it. My Dad couldn't stop driving soon enough-but never actually said he was scared.

I think avoidance breeds more fear.

I think this is a terribly nasty threat.

What about those with anxiety or even PTSD?

Are you really making fun of people with mental health issues?

I don't concern myself with other people's driving habits, and neither should you.

My family live 180 miles away. Up until a couple of years ago I would have avoided the drive and always got DH to drive. But my uncle died and DH couldn't drive me to the funeral so I bit the bullet and drove the 8 hour round trip myself (mostly motorways!). Now I do it 3 or 4 times a year. It's easy peasy, don't know what I was so scared of!! My mum, granny and sister are all in awe and tell me I'm very "brave" to do it on my own. Mmmm

I've got all the sympathy for people who are really scared of driving on the motorway/at night/to new places etc etc but I do think there are women who don't do these things just because a man told them not to. I know they exist, I am related to some of them. When I got my first car my non-driving parents asked my two mechanic uncles to give advice on buying a car and planning routes. One had to be shown my driving license to finally convince him that yes, I could drive a manual and would like to buy one, and the other had to be politely thanked (and ignored) for working me out a 60 minute commute that avoided motorways when the motorway commute was 25 minutes. All my aunties who drive refuse to drive at night, on the motorway or in the rain. The rain! I have an auntie who takes the bus specially when it's raining! And they live in bloody Glasgow!

YANBU - When you are faced with no choice to drive you deal with it and do it. I genuinely don't understand people who can't do a distance like the one in the Op

I really like driving, however used to be nervous of driving in big cities, mainly I think because I grew up in the middle of nowhere and didn't practise and also my mum would go on about how stressful it was to drive into big places. I also remember with pride the first time I drove into central Birmingham and didn't feel at all anxious. I think knowing where you are going plays a real factor in how stressful driving new places can be and I thank the sat nav for helping me drive into central brussels for the first time last week. I know I'm a good driver, but I now only get the car when my husband doesn't need it - after moving abroad last year, my car got sold and public transport's really good here so I haven't got another one. I do miss not having my own car though, and am conscious of the need to regularly practise so you don't become rubbish.

I am however also one of those silly women who gets out of the car when picking my dh up from work on those rare occasions when I do have the car. Didn't realise it was a thing. I don't think he likes my driving tbh but I don't really care - I know I'm safe and confident on the road, and we do always share long journeys. Just on shorter journeys, he'd rather drive and I'm not bothered.

I suffer panic attacks when driving long distances, hence I only drive where I know and no more than 15 miles away.

Why has a five year old thread been dragged up??

YANBU - my SIL won't drive in the dark
Apart from the not driving thing she is the bossiest person on the planet, constantly telling others what to do or ticking them off for not doing it well enough...........

Like what penisland? What's more dangerous than travelling by car, that most people do on a daily basis as a matter of routine?

I am afraid I empathise with the non-drivers. I used to be ok on motorways but hate the crowded double parked roads kind of driving. I then moved miles out of Town and need a car to get everywhere so have had to get on with it. I still really do hate every single journey. However, after talking about it with a friend she suggested hypnotherapy. I forked out for 6 sessions in London (was expensive) with low expectations but it has really worked. I am staggered frankly.

I have been driving for 35 years, but still don't enjoy it. I'm fine in London traffic, where the average speed is quite low, but find motorway driving very difficult. Its partly because I lose focus after about 30 minutes, and find the concentration required for doing the same thing with nothing to relieve the visual monotony is challenging and exhausting. I'm terrified that I'll fall asleep at the wheell. Have previously been motorway driving and suddenly realised I have no recollection of the last 30 miles - that's quite scary.

Quite frankly I'd rather give birth again than drive 100 miles. The impact on daily life is minimal; I drive to work, or get a train, or someone else drives and I navigate, provide snacks and entertainment.

I don't see why some posters on here are quite so nasty- do they not have things they don't enjoy doing?

I've also realised I'm quite impatient when driving, partly because its so tedious. Not good for my blood pressure, or anyone else's!

Why has a five year old thread been dragged up??

Why does it matter how old it is? Clearly it is a popular topic!

I never understand this mentality. If someone starts a new thread, someone who spends far too much time online will heckle them for not doing a search and adding to an existing thread. But then someone does exactly that and gets jumped on by someone who spends far too much time online

I'm a bus driver I drive the 60 foot articulated buses, 14 foot high decker types and the 38 feet long singles. I do rural to city and badly parked cats do my nut in but I've never been scared. Was in a bad accident ( teenage girl speeding after two Bacardi Breezers ) and I was badly injured, and felt a little bit more tense after but HAD to go to work so was retrained by the company. It helped. I would recommend refresher lessons for anybody nervous. It helps a lot. Got me back behind the wheel feeling confidant

Cars not cats. Cats can park wherever they choose, and of course they never park badly

I only passed my driving test a month ago and have not driven far yet. I want to get really used to the family car and properly confident before I go on the motorway. IANBU as far as I am concerned. I go to supermarkets, into town, on dual carriageways etc so I am not pootling around country lanes all the time. Also I have had no need to go further yet but hope to when the right time comes.

I was almost killed in a serious accident ( months of rehab)and am now very nervous .
I also cant drive at night due to nyctalopia < look it up>
So I don't actually give a shit what you think of me OP

Totally agree that people should only drive where they feel comfortable.

I really don't see what it's got to do with anyone else. I don't like driving, DH does so why would I want to drive when he's happy to do it. We went to America recently and he drove the whole time and loved it (I think the Mustang helped!) but it would have stressed me out.

You probably think I'm very pathetic then as I am too scared to drive at all. I learnt late (36) and have an anxiety disorder. I also think my reactions are bad and the roads are safer without me on them!

Yanbu. It's pretty pathetic. I don't understand it, either you're competent on the road or you're no.

I do long journeys, Lyon to the Midlands with two dc in the car on my own. If I go out with my dad though he often drives, mainly because he gets do car dick, I have known him get out the car and this up in the gutter - and its not s reflection on my driving...

Dp though is happy to hand Mr the keys and sots in the back.

I don't like driving with my dh in the car so when we go away he drives, he criticises my driving and I become more hesitant with him in the car, happy to go on motorways etc on my own

I don't like to drive long distances, or for lengths of time longer than an hour because I find driving makes me sleepy. After about an hour, my concentration flags and my reflexes slow. I find that scary and think I'm a danger to myself and others.
I know it's not normal to have this issue and find it frustrating that I'm limited, but I'm not prepared to risk the safety of people by driving when I know I'm impaired.