To be angry that 30 year old fatties are moaning!?!

[sugarray]

My little boy has recently been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I was totally heartbroken when we found out! Since then when people have offered him sweets/at partys/in shops, when I have to tell people he can't have things and why, This is usually followed by chubbie thirty to fifty year olds moaning to me that they or a relative have type 2 diabetes and how hard it is for them!

Type 2 is self inflicted.... btw..
I am soo angry that this has happened to my son.... He is only 4 (through no fault of his own Or anyone else) I just want to shout at them to shut up,stop eating so much shit and move around a bit more!!

This may not make sense, but AIBU?

"Having just read the whole thread, I think the OP is obviously upset and having a rant on here, just looking for some understanding of her feelings." - yes and as you read the whole thread you'll see that the majority of posters said they could understand why she was angry but pointless getting cross with people who have type 2 diabetes because a) type 2 is not all about obesity and has a significant genetic component b) diabetes isn;t great for anyone however its caused.

The whole obesity issue really only started getting heated when other posters piled in with comments some of us thought needed challenging - they were rarely aimed at OP.

If you say things that piss people off in AIBU they will respond. Cries of bullying are ridiculous.

POst at 16:32:15 - didn't give a link but if you google you will find it as I gave key authors name.

For exmple the health service doesn't actually talk about reducing weight to save it money (because they know it isn't true), it talks about "life lengthening and life enhancing" procedures not money saving procedures.

it's how they respond though isn't it?

Dutch study 2008 "Despite the higher annual costs of the obese and smoking cohorts, the healthy-living cohort incurs highest lifetime costs, due to its higher life expectancy," Pieter H. M. van Baal et al but I think there is a more recent one than that

but the difference isn't hugh, infact it is minimal look at the graphs

I think larger people have become the way that smokers were made to feel smoking can be hidden but being larger for whatever reason can not be hidden, and like smokers they know the risk.

The study is interesting and I notice the money for the researcher wasn't form a large company with a side on which way the researcher should show..

TBH I would rather cost the goverment more money and live the extra 8 years if I can hopefully thta might happen!

I was suggesting the differnce was huge just that it flies in the face of what people beleive and will often spout nonsence about their taxes paying for treatment of fat people.

I too would rather live longer and cost them more - and the NHS is kindly helping me to do that.

sorry wasn't suggesting

Well MNHQ obviously thought comments were getting too personal - they deleted puddlepuss's comments about Kitty's pictures.

And it's disingenuous to claim that it's not a form of bullying to start talking about inane things like what's for dinner in an attempt to undermine other posters. I think it's pretty horrible and happens occasionally on AIBU, like the Mallory Towers derailment which I thought was a sneaky, cliquey way of excluding Cherry from debate.

no that was my own though I think, that there would be a bigger difference with the cost - you knwo when you think soemthing in your own mind and not that anyone else has suggested that

But it was good that it was a study doena nd provided for without a bias as so many studies and research are payed for by the companies that want the study to show "it is alright what we sell or do"

lets all hope we have long and quality lives to live - whether that means the NHS has to pay for reducation in size or ceassation of smoking advice and support or nothing at all

holy hell, I am so glad I am leaving now!

Just to say..I had never actually spoken to Litchick before she asked me what's for dinner...so not cliquey...enjoy your petty nastiness..or is it paranoia, I won't miss it!

SUGARRAY - just wanted to reinforce the www.childrenwithdiabetes.com/uk/ (hope that works, new to this) mentioned earlier up thread. I undersatnd your devastation, PLEASE have a look here, DD diagnosed Type1 age 3 and the advice we have had on CWD quite literally changed our lives. If you do nothing else today, check it out!

Fanjo I'm just pointing it out, not pointing the finger at you, I don't even know if you were on the Mallory thread. In RL and with children, we accept that it's nastiness, I'm pointing it out here. It's Litchick who kept trying to derail this one and make it about her size, fashion sense, social class, dinner or whatever.

Too many people on this thread are taking the OP's position as a personal insult and getting super-defensive to the point of insulting an upset poster, I'm just trying to point it out.

[feels pedantic and hun-like but persists]

[continues to 'enjoy petty nastiness and paranoia ]

Sorry but you can't come on AIBU and post the insulting petty comments op did and not expect a mouthful back.

She is upset sure, but did she have to be so personally nasty about people who she deemed to be ignorant to her sons condition, when she showed the exact same shocking lack of ignorance to people with type 2.

Here op devalued any point she tried to make IMVHO, maybe she will learn to be more articulate in future, sure she is devastated any parent is when they get a diagnosis like that, I know but there was absolutely know excuse for the ignorant, rude op.

But it's not insulting personally to any of the posters, unless they are feeding their children fatty foods and passing on their own issues to their children.

This is the judgeypants thread and we are being invited by OP to make cats-bum-mouths at obese parents who have morbidly obese children and continue to feed them crap.

If anyone posting here actually does that, or thinks it's acceptable parenting, let them argue their case. It's not about grown-ups choosing to overeat for whatever reason, it's about forcing this negative cycle on to children.

Mumsnet is a forum to debate parenting choices, not slag off fat people. This thread was meant to be about parenting choices, but posters have made it about fat adults.

Oops wrong thread sorry!

snoozathon - whatever point you were trying to make about bllying I'm afraid went way over my thread with dinner and CHerry comments.

Most people were not responding to the OP but to Kitty's comments.

The thing with a debate/discussion is that it can go in lots of different directions. And I was part of a massive tangent I'm not ashamed to say. I think the use of the word 'fatties are moaning' in the title bought up all the talk of fat people and THEIR life choices - and tbh I don't think that is a bad thing, it's just discussion. It got a bit personal when people were being really mean to Kitty but she was taking a hard line which not everyone likes, particularly if they themselves are overweight or obese.

FWIW I thought all the talk about dinner was a bit nonsensical but I laughed at the Fanjo thing (when I realised what I had said) and thought it was all a bit ridiculous.

And why are you leaving Fanjo - is this what people call a flounce ?

YAsssooooBU I know a dc with type 2 diabetes who has other major health issues which could prove fatal. FFS she did NOT bring that on herself.

Have other relatives who are overweight due to medication who have type 2 diabetes as a side effect of their conditions

YES be upset for you dc it must be very hard but don't judge people you don't know. You wouldn't like it.

Ruby..i was leaving as I was sick of all the bitching. But I decided not to. So not a real flounce, had just actually had enough. Then Irealised I have been here for years and there were a lot of nice people here too

Kew Yes, it was Kitty who was being shouted down and that's the point I was 'trying to make'. If you think having her photos and looks criticised viciously is appropriate then that's just peachy.

Ruby You were making your point clearly and being very patient, not referring to you in the slightest! Nothing wrong with little tangents, I just hate the whole condescending eyeroll attitude some posters can get when there is a whole group feeling strongly about something at the expense of another poster, and a tangent is used to make it clear to a poster just how 'out of the loop' she is. Don't like it one bit.

/rant

Anyway am also leaving thread, it's not a constructive debate or a useful thread for diabetes so not going to help it thrash on.

what loop? I didn't actually know anyone on the thread, so how can that be a clique or loop

Fanjo please don't flounce. Nothing I posted was personal to you, but I'm sorry if I offended or hurt you.

:)

Cross-posting here, but reiterating it wsn't about you Fanjo just generalising wildly, surely everyone gets annoyed with that kind of posting behaviour?

I'm not flouncing, I was quite sick of being implied to be a bully just because I have posted here for a long time and was annoyed at people is all.

But not going anywhere.

You are being unreasonable, and you know you are, my mother (who has never been over weight in her life developed type 2 diabetes, she is on novarapid and some other injection of insulin, she has lost a leg and is confined to a wheelchair, is that all brought on by herself, I think not.

I o understand it is hard when you find out there is something wrong with your child and they are not "normal" but having a go about others because they are not as sick as your child is a bit silly.

I have type 2 as well, because I had kidney failure when I was younger, born with defective kidneys nothing I or anyone else did, was told I would most likely develop diabetes in later life and here we are 39 and on metformin