To be angry that 30 year old fatties are moaning!?!

[sugarray]

My little boy has recently been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I was totally heartbroken when we found out! Since then when people have offered him sweets/at partys/in shops, when I have to tell people he can't have things and why, This is usually followed by chubbie thirty to fifty year olds moaning to me that they or a relative have type 2 diabetes and how hard it is for them!

Type 2 is self inflicted.... btw..
I am soo angry that this has happened to my son.... He is only 4 (through no fault of his own Or anyone else) I just want to shout at them to shut up,stop eating so much shit and move around a bit more!!

This may not make sense, but AIBU?

i don't know anyone's fanjo, not that it is a problem if one wants to know anothers fanjo. this is getting really silly.

anyway, i somehow have ended up being called a bitch and shallow on this thread[conufused]. i am being honest, and not particularly controversial iyam. i don't remember making sweeping generalisations puddlepuss, i did say that there are many many people who could eat less, exercise more if they wanted to be happier...

Ruby - well, you have redeemed yourself a little

and some of you lot are being well tricky! but i suspect that you are not unhappy about this!

Not at all..can you blame me for standing up for my friend?

don't worry i'm always on the wrong side, tbh I'd be worried if I was on the right side.

but no one is getting at your friend - i am sure she is lovely .

Ruby, your comment about people claiming they hardly eat and are still fat being hard to believe pissed me off but then you went on to say that you had sympathy for me, for which I thanked you and explained that I cross-posted. Other people have wound me up on here and I'm riled. I should have taken the time to go back through the thread and realised that your later comments took away from any generalisations. I'm sorry.

did you find that article which says think people cost more on the NHS?

really no problem puddlepuss. the comment about the hardly eating and still being fat was also a bit provocative. (although there are people who say that and its not true)

someone on here also said they eat only toast and crackers and can't lose weight but its not surprising as their body probably thinks there is no food and so stores fat for imminent food shortages - these types of things in the thread prompted that comment.

its very difficult to differentiate in a debate like this without constantly qualifying everything you are saying.

I always wonder why the kind of people go on about how wrong it is to be overweight always try to justify their behaviour by saying things about how it is obviously bad for their health to be overweight. But it never occurs to them that

a) the overweight people are probably more than aware of the health problems (living with them and all that )
b) could probably do without the added problems of being told how "disgusting" they are

I also hate the "oh well of course I didn't mean the ones who have health issues which cause them to gain weight". It's funny how "all fat people are disgusting" rapidly changes to "some" when they get pulled up on it.

And then there's also the fact, that them saying "I didn't mean them" doesn't negate the fact that they are making presumptions in the first place.

And no, you don't have to find fat people attractive. But you could try treating them like humans.

Fabulous! Right I'm off before I get all gooey and have to join netmums.

Did not mean that type 2 complications were 'worse', but as type 2 is slow onset the complications can become apparant by the time of diagnosis and its too late to prevent them. Both types are very serious with complications that can cause disability and death.

The reason a lot of fat people are fat, particularly fat women, is because they got bullied, when quite young and a healthy weight that just happened to be a bit bigger than some of the people around them, into going on a diet. This slowed their metabolisms down. After stopping the diet, they regained the lost weight and some more. So they went on another diet. Same thing happened again. Once you have done this a few times, your metabolism is so messy that unless you restrict yourself to something like 500 calories a day forever you will get fat and with every ridiculous unhealthy restricted diet you are bullied into trying, you will end up fatter. The diet industry is utterly toxic (and misogynistic), peddling all manner of unhealthy eating patterns and packets of appalling synthetic junk 'food substitutes' that damage health even more.

OP: I am sorry for your son, and that you feel so shit about it. This will pass: diabetes, properly managed, is not life-threatening. But be wary of 'magical thinking' ie if you are good (and engage i n sufficient spiteful condemnation of the unhealthy for their badness), then nothing will ever go wrong for you or your family. THis is bullshit.

It's bad for your health to be nasty and judgmental and sneer at other people for being less perfect than you. Seriously - friendship and social networks and actually enjoying life are strongly correlated with good health, the lack of them strongly correlated with ill health.

A positive, friendly attitude to one's fellow human beings is A Good Thing all round, but especially for the person possessing such an attitude.

SGB, do you really, really believe that someone living on 500 calories a day would gain weight? Really?

It does remind me of that TV presenter Trisha ( can't remember surname) who lost a load of weight after a friend, who had listened to her moaning about her metabolism pointed out
"Ain't no fatties in a famine!"

Based only on my own experience, I have often moaned that I am not one of those lucky people who can eat what they want and stay slim. But what I have had to accept is that what I want to eat is generally very tasty but very high in fat. My friends who eat what they want generally like fruit and might possibly feel a bit sick if they eat a whole muffin. I wish I felt sick when I eat a whole muffin but I don't! I wish that the thought of a punnet of blueberries or strawberries was like heaven to me but it isn't!. When I pay attention to fat and calories and reduce what I am taking in, I lose weight, when I don't pay attention I probably consume 3000 calories a day and this is an estimate because at those times I really am not counting.

It's basically physics and maths, surely?

Btw I am not having a go at anyone who is overweight as I am currently in that camp myself but I think the metabolism thing is a myth for most people.

Chipmonkey: SOmeone who has messed up his/her metabolism by repeated yo-yo dieting will have to live on a very low-calorie diet forever not to gain weight. A 'normal' diet will not stop that person gaining weight because that person's metabolism is fucked by years of dieting. If you have dieted a lot, then to stay thin you have to live on a diet that will mean you are ALWAYS HUNGRY. This is a miserable way to exist, so people either give up the diet (and gain more weight, then hate themselves and carry on doing the damage) or they take up something else damaging, like drug addiction of some kind or incessant smoking, to take their minds off their hunger.

The head of medicine at Imperial Weight loss centra at Charing Cross hospital says the best adnice he could give to someone underweight is to diet as its the surest way to put on weight in the long term.

I am overweight and I do not over eat. I eat 1400 calories a day and take orlistat.

My GP had your attitude until she did a colesterol test which was 3.7.

My DH is always saying things about fat people, even though he is slim he eats 5000 calories a day. He went to a meeting last week and ate five Danish pastries. Because he has a fast metabolism he is not a second class citizen.

But you are upset about your son and I can understand that. My DS had a diabetis test a few weeks ago, my GP was convinced that he had it due to recurring skin infection. I was relieved to find out he did not, but know I would have felt as bad as you if he did.

So you are being unreasonable, but understandably so.

Having just read the whole thread, I think the OP is obviously upset and having a rant on here, just looking for some understanding of her feelings.

I also think she was being flippant in her judgeyness of fat people, and I don't understand why fat people are the one thing people on here don't want to be judgey about? If I was being flippant I'd say her comments hit a nerve with lots of posters here, and it ceased to be about diabetes and was instead fat people justifying why it's ok to be fat! I'd love to see smokers or heavy drinkers defending an unhealthy lifestyle choice so vigorously.

FWIW I got frustrated with a friend of mine who I went travelling with - camping in Europe - because she was constantly thinking about food, constantly needing to find more when we were sightseeing. It opened my eyes to the disorder that obesity is [caveat - non-medically caused obesity] It's an addiction, yes, but the denial in so many people's attitudes is pretty astounding - it's unattractive, unhealthy, bad for the environment and you have to be pretty antisocial to want to continue overeating all the time. She was dissatisfied with everything except eating, it was obviously her lover and I couldn't distract her with beautiful mountain views or a row on a lake.

Bullying takes many forms and ganging up on a member for having a differing view is not very nice and has shown quite a few posters pretty damn' negatively. Cliquey doesn't even begin to cover it, and commenting negatively on someone's photos is just low.

oh yawn. Several non fat people were annoyed about the belittling of fat people. And why do people bleat about bullying if more than one person is annoyed at once. Do we draw lots so only one person can express annoyance? Ffs

btw i didn't know most of the others who were annoyed,hardly a clique

lynli, it is your dp that could well end up the skinny type two statistic cos he eats to much sugar, he may well not have a slow metabolism but he could become insulin resistant due to the large amounts of sugar he eats, 5 pastries is 4 too many and if he continues to eat sugar in this way he could well find himself as a type two.

kewcumber - did you find that peice about thin people costing the NHS more than larger people who die sooner

yes didn't I post it - it was a dutch study 2008 lookers at smokers and the obese - will have to look for it again.