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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To split up due to DH going to lapdancing club?

432 replies

chocolatte2 · 09/08/2010 10:47

DH was on a stag do at the weekend. Asked him to not go to LDC as hate everything about them. He assured me that it wouldn't be that kind of weekend. Stag not a dirty pervert kind of guy.

Admitted last night did go & got lapdance. (think about 15 blokes & 4 got dances) WTF! He then admits on further questioning to have gone once before when our 1st born was 4wks old!!! Was promoted& boss paid!! This he has kept from me for 5 years!

Now I know some will say, it's only a titty bar, chill out but we have had a terrible year. Found out before Xmas he had taken girl colleague out for a drink by herself. They had a small kiss at end of night. I found out by a text mess next day. Feel this may have developed into affair if I hadn't caught him out.

This was so out of character for my so called loving DH and father. He never flirted with girls, never remarked on girls on tv or when we were out. Actually I really loved this about him. Really never had to worry about him cheating etc.

Anyway, I was devastated, completely broken. He was so remorseful- stopped nts out etc. We had counselling which helped. We were just beginning to get back on track though I am so sad about all that happened & how the wonderful (smug) marriage we had was over & we had to start afresh.

This is why I really cannot be believe he has hurt me like this again. Up all last night crying- both of us, I really cannot see a way forward. I just feel he has no respect for me or our kids. When I think of him at that club when our baby was a newborn & I was postnatal, it makes me feel physically sick.

What I need to know is- has anyone experienced similar. I really can't see a way forward but I truly love him & he is a wonderful dad. I feel like a doormat!

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 10/08/2010 23:03

no explanations for the trollery name-changing on this thread then ?

it's all gone quiet over there ~~~~>

trolls are not like they used to be ie. clever

2old4thislark · 10/08/2010 23:04

{grin} ANYF

Sorry Frank - just think if it hasn't been said by now it's probably not worth saying. And having followed 1000 posts on a PORN thread a few months ago, they do going around in circles after a while.

Anyway, I'm off to bed so you can have a serious discussion without me interupting. Wonder if I'll dream about rabbits and cockwaving Grin

AnyFucker · 10/08/2010 23:08

but frank, posting out of context to try and resurrect a row interesting discussion will not be successful in forcing a thread where you want it to go either

evidently

Appletrees · 10/08/2010 23:18

E

AnyFucker · 10/08/2010 23:20

E?

yes, please, if you are offering

franklampoon · 13/08/2010 01:22

bullies, we all hate them

Alouiseg · 13/08/2010 03:52

I love bullies! Mines called Rupert he's 9 months old and my PFD :o.

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