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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Children getting changed in front of the opposite sex for PE-age 8 and 9

331 replies

Ayerightyouare · 03/08/2010 22:25

I am new to posting,not lurking,and after a fab glass or two of Spar 2 bottles for £7.50 am off and running dear children at their grans for a sleepover,ahem
My children,boy age 8,and girl age 9,expressed extreme anxiety over the "changing for PE arrangements"...ie the girls had to get changed in front of the boys and vice versa,in the same classroom.
I saw the headteacher about this before the end of last term,and, to the point, was told that "Well,Mrs insert name,you are the only parent who has brought this up,I like children to be children,innocent,there is no problem,we don't have the staff to supervise 2 different sex groups,there is no problem,the children are okay with it,and you are welcome in to come and see them change in front of each other"
I told her about some of the,for want of a better word,pornographic things that I had heard children of this age speak about.
I do not agree with her,for the sole reason that my children have told me that they do not like this.And,I will not come in as a stranger and watch children changing when I know my own children's feelings on the matter.I explained that children in the school system are not going to go against their teacher when they know that they have no choice in the matter.
I really felt patronised TBH.
Now,in the last week,I have had an example of "creative writing" left on my kitchen table by a 10 yr old girl.I have lots of my children's friends around,and they often do "arts and crafts" at the kitchen table.
Here is what she wrote:

"My Daughter's name, you are a dick head, you suck dick, eat shit, you fancy name of boy,and have sex withname of other boy every night.
name of other boy has cheesy nipples and you suck them every night.Just to tell you how do you know boys name has cheesy nipples do you suck them, got it, you suck other boys name dick don't you? "
I mean,come on,this is a 10 year old girl.It is not her fault,she is just showing what that age group has been exposed to via the media.Her Mum is very very strict.
When the school term commences,I am making an appt with the headmistress and basically demanding that she allows children to retain their dignity when getting changed.I have spoken to my daughter regarding this piece of creative writing,she has just turned 9,and she is very uncomfortable about getting changed in front of boys considering what she has now been exposed to."Sucking Dicks" indeed. Am I being Unreasonable ?

OP posts:
TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 00:50

Someguy, thats one of the reasons i deleted them...although the girl is in the year above DS1 in school....so not sure what age she is as he is a summer baby

Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 00:50

Pixieona Leaf,

They are all in the same room,and seemingly tee hee at each other.That seems "in front of" ?

Night night XX

OP posts:
TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 00:51

OP but kids do that wherever they are!!!

ParanoidTwit · 04/08/2010 00:52

I feel very sorry for the OP and especially her daughter. No one has considered this girls feelings. Regardless of how she has got these feelings of being uncomfortable they are now there and it is insensitive to disregard them.

AnyFucker · 04/08/2010 00:54

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TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 00:55

AF that might be pornographic!!

AnyFucker · 04/08/2010 00:56

sg...don't bring your issues from another thread to this one

we are having fun and you are trying to derail it

NickOfTime · 04/08/2010 00:57

ohhhhhhh, if they 'tee hee' at each other, that's definitely worth following up. call the lea. or the governors.

tee heeing should be banned, really.

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 00:57

OMG AF!!!!

Fun = pleasure = pleasure = sex = pornographic!!!!!!

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 00:58

nick, i know how dare children teehee

BaronessBomburst · 04/08/2010 00:58

AF 'good for poking'

and now I am logging off....I am, I am.....

AnyFucker · 04/08/2010 00:58
Grin
AnyFucker · 04/08/2010 00:59

I really should go to bed

oops

tee-hee

NickOfTime · 04/08/2010 01:00

that's why tee heeing isn't covered in the curriculum until y7. when they do have sep changing rooms...

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 01:01

i should go to that other room where the bed is - are we allowed to say bed?

PixieOnaLeaf · 04/08/2010 01:01

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TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 01:02

Nick I know at least by yr7 they are able to teehee responsibly!
the sheer cheek of younger children tee heeing!

Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 01:03

This reply has been deleted

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AnyFucker · 04/08/2010 01:03

it is very sinister, lady

especially when they do it in front of each other and without supervision from random ofice staff

serotoninbutterfly · 04/08/2010 01:04

OPs name is ayerightyouare and she posted in AIBU...

Just noticed this!

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/08/2010 01:04

AF, I know I am seriously worried about putting DS2 into nursery now...what if he teehee's with other children what would i do?

Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 01:13

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Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 01:15

Bit of Fun...my daughter is 9....the girl who wrote the "piece" is 10....not a big age difference surely you agree?

OP posts:
Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 01:18

sigh

"Tee hee" is the words the HEADMISTRESS used, not me.

OP posts:
Ayerightyouare · 04/08/2010 01:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

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