Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

FUCKING HELL I HAVE JUST HIT MY MIL

161 replies

slushy · 29/07/2010 19:33

OMG I feel so guilty it is my time of the month she was shouting at my dp for 10 minutes about him and his sister not talking. Saying how horrible for her, so I stood up and said it has not exactly been great for me either you know, I have had a lot of stress lately worried because of my health this has been going on since dd was born.

She said I was a fucking evil bitch you will get what is coming to you I am fucking going. I followed her and told her not to come back without a apology she grabbed me and started strangling me in front of my poor dc. So I pushed her off and she tried to bite me the only way to stop her was to hit her so I hit her and it desended into a full scale fight my DP tried to break it up and she bit him.

I had her hair to stop her harming me and let it go when dp intervened. She said she is gonna phone the police and have me done for assault so I have phoned them they say I was assaulted. I don't wanna press charges MIL is a nurse and will lose her job as well as her son. I am so ashamed of myself, I hate my bad temper and I cannot believe I did this in front of my children.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 22:37

radge/gash/shan guid colloquialisms.i lived in Edinburgh as student

expatinscotland · 29/07/2010 22:39

DH also uses narky to describe the 'bairns' when they get fractious.

scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 22:40

haha narky/crabbit.aye my weans are that awright

Original poster
slushy · 29/07/2010 22:42

Hi I am back dc settled, still waiting for the police they called and said they are busy tonight but will try to get up.

I don't think MIL has any mental health issues she just seems to lose her temper when she cant have her way, she hated me since day one. I am slightly sad for my ds because he will miss her however bad she was she was still his nan. But me and dp have agreed that we don't want her seeing the dc anymore.

I am still in shock she was in a funny mood today, but although I don't think violence is the answer I think she will do less damage to my dc this way. DS is 4 so will get over it soon I hope, children seem so resilient. It seems weird because today for me was just a normal day till this happened.

But there is no way back now (which in a way relieves me that it is over)no apology can undue this now.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 29/07/2010 22:47

Really there's no way back from biting your own son. That's just way, way, way beyond whacked.

scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 22:51

mil bit dil,son and grandson.terminate contact.no emotional reconciliation,just draw a calm dignified line under it

Original poster
slushy · 29/07/2010 22:53

No clarify she didn't harm my ds she bit her ds she didn't physically hurt my ds at all just scared the life out of him.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 22:54

oh apologies i misread as she bit the boy

mummysgoingmad · 29/07/2010 22:55

i dont blame you, she is the only one missing out, i mean how nutty do you have to be to completely lose it over something so trivial, seems a bit bonkers to me.

RunawayWife · 29/07/2010 23:02

Please please please take advice from someone who knows, Take photos of any marks you have and press charges

scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 23:04

yes get corroborating evidence

Original poster
slushy · 29/07/2010 23:07

I have no camera other than my phone one the other camera is broke waiting to be fixed my phone is not good enough though. Hopefully the police will be here soon. Will they take photos?

OP posts:
SolidGoldBrass · 29/07/2010 23:10

It doesn't matter whether she has MH issues or she's just a raving arsehole. She still hit you and bit your H, therefore she's not welcome in your home any more. As and when you have to talk to your DS about why she's not coming to visit, tell him that Granny was very naughty when she lost her temper, and she can't come back until she's properly sorry. (IE, so he doesn;t think that if he;s naughty he'll be sent away without redemption; let him get the idea that people who do bad things need to apologise and understand why they did the bad thing and then they get forgiven).

Original poster
slushy · 29/07/2010 23:11

I am beginning to wonder if they are coming I phoned at 7.15 so 4 hours ago I realise they are probably busy but will they come this late? I don't know I have not had dealings with the police.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 29/07/2010 23:13

mental health was a red herring chucked by others.as op says mil has no mental health issues

pragmatically, id terminate contact,for ever

mummysgoingmad · 29/07/2010 23:17

i think you would need to go to the police staion to get pictures took. I dont think they would take them if they vistied you in your home.

Are you thinking about pressing charges now slushy?

RunawayWife · 29/07/2010 23:20

If the police do not come go to them first thing tomorrow and make a complaint against her, and do not let it drop.

What happens when your child upsets her and she chucks a nutty fit attacking him?
She is a vile woman and TBH deserves to lose her job, she is not fit to work with people

Original poster
slushy · 29/07/2010 23:22

Yes I am gonna speak with the police officer if he/she gets here and see what he/she thinks is the best course of action.

OP posts:
Katiekitty · 29/07/2010 23:41

Please, Slushy, don't pin this on your 'time of the month'. You acted immediately to stop what was happening, you acted on instinct. By saying 'time of the month' it belittles your protective instinct.

You acted in self-defence and that of your family too.

People will diminish this action on 'silly behaviour' if you say 'oh daft old me, it was my time of the month'.

Be strong and take care

Original poster
slushy · 30/07/2010 00:01

Well I have spoken to the police ladies, My MIL who got in first driving straight to the station (I don't drive) and is alleging I hither first.

The police ladies said as equal damage was done (apparently I hit her rather hard) and there are no eye witness over than my dp who has a conflict of interest (being his mum and his partner) again the same with my ds plus dont want to ask a 4yo cild. So unless there are any noise complaints there is nothing the cps can do either way.

But it is on record that there was a altercation but it is my word against hers so they are not prosecuting either of us. I am going to go to bed now but thank you all ladies for supporting me and keeping me company things always look brighter in the morning.

OP posts:
ChippingIn · 30/07/2010 00:26

Slushy - that is very, very annoying. Did you show them your injuries?

Did you see any of your neighbours that would back you up??

I hope you are in bed sleeping now. Will catch up with you tomorrow x

slm1401 · 30/07/2010 01:09

I hope you are ok ... you shouldn't be blaming yourself though! She tried strangling you and then BIT you ... I don't blame you for hitting her!

My god, families .... stand up for yourself though and you need to keep that woman away from your family - but above all please stop feeling guilty xx

BarmyArmy · 30/07/2010 08:10

Sounds like you deserve one another, if you ask me. Ugh.

Altinkum · 30/07/2010 08:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HettiesMum · 30/07/2010 08:55

Your MIL is a NURSE and she bites people and tries to strangle them ?