FUCKING HELL I HAVE JUST HIT MY MIL

[slushy]

OMG I feel so guilty it is my time of the month she was shouting at my dp for 10 minutes about him and his sister not talking. Saying how horrible for her, so I stood up and said it has not exactly been great for me either you know, I have had a lot of stress lately worried because of my health this has been going on since dd was born.

She said I was a fucking evil bitch you will get what is coming to you I am fucking going. I followed her and told her not to come back without a apology she grabbed me and started strangling me in front of my poor dc. So I pushed her off and she tried to bite me the only way to stop her was to hit her so I hit her and it desended into a full scale fight my DP tried to break it up and she bit him.

I had her hair to stop her harming me and let it go when dp intervened. She said she is gonna phone the police and have me done for assault so I have phoned them they say I was assaulted. I don't wanna press charges MIL is a nurse and will lose her job as well as her son. I am so ashamed of myself, I hate my bad temper and I cannot believe I did this in front of my children.

Thank you I just feel guilty for hitting a 50 yo woman it does not get good street cred really.
She was stone cold sober at the time, Dp backing me 100% thanks. I am gonna go see how much damage this has done to my family.

Although yes a peaceful Christmas now .

For Gods sake woman press charges, she attacked you.
Also she deserves to lose her job, would anyone really want an alcoholic nurse treating them/ their family, I would not

And this woman is a nurse???

If your DP was there and he's backing you, that says it all really.

I'm starting to feel sorry for her being in such a state that she's lashing out at people around her, but not to the extent that it distracts from what she did to you and your DC.

shit what a dreadful situation slushy. So you're not perfect, but your MIL attacked you verbally & physically - sounds to me like you acted in defence. I really hope you can work it so you never have to communicate again - she sounds bad for everyones health!

It's awful to lose it though - you're bound to be shaken.
talk to the kids about it when you can - but take some time to get yourself together. Cup of tea and a bath.

Big hug

She can get her nurses registration taken off her if she puts the profession into disrepute. Conduct not fit to practice (or something like that).

Crikey, what's she like when she's not sober?

Gosh, I hope she does loose her license. I don't want to be in hospital one day and end up being "looked after" by her! It was not your fault. If you hadn't defended yourself, you or even the DCs might have been seriously hurt.

I agree. She sounds unstable. You should perhaps report the incident.

Press charges. People don't start acting like this at 50, she's been getting away with it for years. She probably won't loose her job at that age officially, she'll be encouraged to quit/retire early.

What to tell your DCs, how about, "Granny lost her temper and tried to hurt Mummy, so Mummy had to stop her. You should never try to hurt someone when you loose you temper. Don't worry, niether Mummy nor Granny were hurt and Daddy won't let Granny do that again."

Whilst i think she wound you up to the point of provocation yousay that you feel this anger and aggresion a lot.

Have you spoken to a GP? I have a friend who has extreme PMT and she is now medicated for it. she says it has made her life immeasurably better.

but if it helps in the meantime, your MIL is a crackpot

You were acting in self-defence apparently so although you are understandably feeling shocked you reacted as anyone probably would. That said maybe your partner should have shown her the door when she started shouting to begin with. Young children are very sensitive even to atmospheres and I know that we tried never to have "adult" arguments or "adult" shouting in front of ours. By that I mean any shouting in front of the children was usually the "tidy your room/stop hitting your brother/keep that football away from the windows" type of shouting - never two adults shouting at each other in front of them. A bit of old-fashioned "not in fromt of the children" can be the best way forwards sometimes. Don't know what else to say really.

Stay the hell away and I would report her. So what if she loses her job I'm a nurse and certainly wouldn't want to work with a violent alcoholic who hits people in front of children and certainly wouldn't one caring for any of my family!!! Don't feel guilty for other peoples unreasonable behavour. YOU acted in self defense. Would you continually allow a freind who hit you in front of your children in your life and in your house NO so don't allow her just because she is family.

Hope your okay.

you are all at fault.hitting,biting,arguing.god almighty.what family

so deep breath
you have to find out if she went to police.if so they will contact you take statements
will you retaliate and press counter charges

i suggest given the circumstances you and dh refrain from contact

and all of you look at triggers,cues and what gets you going

She assaulted you and you defended yourself. If she is an alcoholic with violent tendencies then how can she possibly be effective as a nurse and should she really be practicing anyway given that she potentially can make the difference between life and death for people in her care. I would press charges that way if she does press charges you have done it first (changes the way a court will look at it if it gets that far). Plus a record for assault on you will mean she definitely would not be looked on favourably for grand-parental access arrangements.

What LeQueen said. That's just like some type of parallel universe to me. Sorry you are going through that.

I am feeling better now ds seems fine now, he seems to think nanny will say sorry for hitting mummy and being naughty, and then everything will be okay but he did say he was scared nanny was going to hit him. I reassured him that I would not let nanny hurt him and that it wont happen again.I have not told him that he wont see nanny again.

Dp was in shock but says he is feeling ok now but has said he is embarrassed by his mother that it came to this. He saw her advance on me but did not see her strangle me but has seen the marks on my neck and believes me from what he saw. MIL is actually calmer when drunk and was probably getting annoyed because she was due her drink (she drinks every evening).

I have not lost my temper due to PMT since I was a teenager this was my first period after bf in a year so I didn't think I needed medication for it. I have called the police they are going to come around. She is a surprising good nurse apperantly and gets loads of pay rises me and dp always wondered how but assume she must be different.

Slushy are you my db`s girlfriend ?
Your MIL sounds spookily like my mother ...Her finest moment was when she started hitting my pregnant sister who had just miscarried one of her twins..
Press charges ...your MIL wont stop until you do .Dont feel guilty , you didnt hit her first .It was only in self defence.

I called the police straight away btw.