To Think that Babies don't Belong in Super-Swanky Restaurants?

[14hourstillbedtime]

I love babies (especially on toast). Also love the integrated Mediterranean-like culture over here that enfolds babies into everyday life (babies with meatballs? babies on marinated lamb?)

However, I still think there are some places Babies don't Belong, and one of these places is a make-up and high-heels uber swanky restaurant! Yesterday, DH and I (very over-excitedly) went out for only the second time since DC2 (3 months), and there, slap bang in the middle of the posh joint, was a four/five month old baby!! It was very delicious-looking, but I can't help but wish it hadn't been there...

So, Am I Being Unreasonable?!

SMA - if directed at me? - I'm not a newbie!

(And I don't mind being told IABU, I just clearly think that I am not )

Babies in restaurants don't bother me at all so from my perspective I think YABU but I've spent lots of time in France and tend towards that way of thinking re kids in restaurants. I don't think 8pm is that late either. My dcs don't go down until around that time earliest, it's just the way we do things. Partly because I don't want them up before 7.30am .

We quite often go out for a meal at 6-6.30ish and may still be in restaurant with dcs at 8pm and as dd gets older I'll be more and more inclined to take her to lovely restaurants for dinner. If she misbehaves she would be removed pronto! I don;t intend to spend my life at hell holes that are "child friendly" they make my teeth itch. It's this type of separatist/segregated culture is what makes it so much bloody hard work being a parent in this country.

What age would you start taking kids, then?

I know my older 2 (9 and 10) really do appreciate swanky (my swanky aoin't LCridges mind but then am not a Londoner either- here we have 2 restaurants, both pretty swanky really)

Seven year old wouldn't care less though so would seem a waste of cash

But we want older two to elarn to appreciate decent food etc

YANBU one little bit. Since I had DD I have tried to stay aware that while DH and I think she is the most beautiful, charming, delightful human being to ever grace the planet , no one else does. And that is doubly the case for dressed up romantic couples spending their hard-earned cash on a nice meal in a fancy-pants restaurant.

I do recall having a pretty pricey lunch somewhere as a special treat when on maternity leave with 2 other mates with babies but it was pretty gruesome tbh as one or the other of us was always outside trying to calm down one of the DCs. And that was lunch. Dinner - no way. Totally inappropriate and offensive IMO. I wouldn't want my DD there, it's an adult environment and rightly so.

And I EBF for 6mo I should add so yes, I more or less gave up those kinds of nights out for that duration. Isn't that one of the (many) things you sacrifice when you have DC?

minx - exactly.

Hell would have to freeze over before I'd go to Frankie and Bennies, Nandos, Chiquitos, TGI Fridays or any other "restaurant" of a similar ilk. Have boycotted Cafe Rouge for it's consistent crapness

Do Pizza Express though as the food id fresh and I think it caters well for both adults and children and has a less screechy tacky atmosphere than the above, the Pizza Expresses round here are quite classy and well designed.

Just because I want some kind of life at the weekend I won't be consigned to the above nastiness.

But novice why should it be? I genuinely don't understand why new parents should relegate themselves to eating in sub-standard places.
It was our first wedding anniversary when DS was 3 months old, and we wanted to go out for a lovely meal. He was EBF so there was no question of not taking him. He slept throughout and we had a lovely evening.

When my Mum was 60, DS was 8 months. We all went to Le Manior and he was good as gold, we all had a lovely day and he didn't disturb anyone else who was there.

Why should I have missed out on those things just because I am a parent?

I took DS to France for a week when he was 3 months, we ate out in some lovely restaurants and everyone was so welcoming and the attitude was completely different.

Tbh sanctimoanyarse I don't actually know what age I would take them (being not so experienced with children that age!) and I'm only really talking about super swanky restaurants as in michelin star style as they are a completely different kettle of fish usually (hence normally being used for special occasions by most people which the manager with claridges was telling us too).

My children are quite non fussy eaters too but I honestly don't think there would be anything on their menu (or any other Michelin star restaurant I have been to) that they would actually eat.

But I have taken them to pretty swanky restaurants before (well swanky in my opinion) that also have kids menus with very decent food etc

I just love a nice adult night out when it is a special occasion and we are really pushing the boat out

I've taken mine to LUNCH at michelin starred places since she was about a year. she eats off the a la carte menu - either they do a small portion, or she has a starter. LUNCH though. when people expect to see children.

I do agree lunch is different to dinner.

I hate noisy kids at restuarants

Especially my own

Spent yesterday at a vairy nice so called gormet pub with a screaming enfant at the next table with a reet pair refusing to get poor child out of the baby seat as he'll soon settle

he fecking didn't

Cue 45 mins (count 'em) of ear shattering (and I'm partially deaf so feck me it was LOUD) screams while DH and me attempted to hold a sensible conversatio]

[I'm just jealous cos we never took out dc's till they were past screaming stage}

Super swanky manky

You pay lunch or dinner (no MATTER what the price paid) its fair enough you don't get yelled at.

It really wouldn't bother me.

If the baby is quiet and not noisely disruptingpeople I really can't see how people can object.

i object more to cacklinggroups of women, or businessmen talking loudly on their phones, or drunk people shouting across the table to one another.

What is child friendly though? Any restaurant that welcomes and provides facilities for children are child-friendly, it doesn't depend on whether the patrons wish to see children there or not!

And do people actively choose restaurants to visit because they have kids menus? Kids menus are the most pointless things ever. Children are the same species as us adults, I don't see why they can't just eat smaller portions of what we eat.

is

Good grief, ali, I'm not consigning you all to The Pit of Hell that is Chuckee Cheese, but surely there is some happy medium between Claridges and McDonald's?

Yesterday, there was a really yummy Ethiopian place down the road from our restaurant that we've taken DS (3) to, at early dinner time, and the food is fabulous... I genuinely don't think you should have to eat horrible crap just cos you have a child, but as a rule of thumb, if they're serving champagne and it's past 8pm, maybe it's not a kid's place? Not that I think there's any convincing you I'm not Cruella DeVille

But for older DC (let's say... once they're able to sit down for a meal in a reliable fashion?) then sure, take them wherever!

God, I have been out for a decent dinner as much in 4 years as you have in 3 months, OP.

Which is not to disparage you at all; rather, it made me feel sadder than a sad thing eating a sad meal in her own sad house for the 14 billionth f*ing room. Those 3 ateriskes being the only stars connected with my eating habits atm.

Interestingly (to me: only to me), I did finally decide to take DD along with me the other night, rather than miss yet another sedate drinks party. She keeps late hours, you see. But I wouldn't really risk inflicting general toddler antics upon evening diners in a restaurant ... or if I did, it would be somewhere I would leave quickly. Don't think I would try to have an enjoyable adult evening AND take my DD.

Although there is a Thai restaurant, run by a young-ish couple with small children, which actively encourages people (us, anyway) to bring our kids along. I'm not sure if they just want the extra covers, though ... business is a little slow, no doubt due to all the kids running around

14 billionth room???

Time. Time.

FWIW when we're out during the day we take DD to some lovely family-friendly places to eat, never been to a TGI Fridays or similar. I know we're a bit spoiled in London but Giraffe is pretty ubiquitous and nice, Wagamamas is fab, I don't think you have to resign yourself to years of terrible food when you have DC. Butv when we have an occasion for a nice dinner (not as often as we'd like) we get a babysitter, get dressed up, I even put on heels and we pretend for a few hours that we're carefree 20-somethings on a hot date

Druzhok how old is your DD?

Also, and as an aside (and I hijack, but 'tis my thread ) are you Polish?

YANBU.

Babies are unpredictable - we used to take ds out to the local curry place, & he slept happily under the table in his car seat, but it was a cheap night out & we'd've exited sharpish if he'd disturbed other diners.

In fact, after a nightmarish meal there with friends whose then 2 year old dd was over-tired & behaved as you might expect throughout - we decided No More Evening Dining Out With Kids, & have pretty much stuck to it.

Also, if it's a relatively expensive place, then people may well have saved up for dinner + babysitter. Antisocial to inflict wailing infants on them in these circumstances!

Ah yes novicemama, I agree wagamamas is great for a tasty meal out with the kids. That's one place we take our dc a lot

Also Jamie Olivers 'Italian' restaurants are child friendly too and the food there is fab (think there are a few of these around now).

14hours: 19 months.

DH and I have been for a quick Thai meal together, since she was born. That is it. It wasn't even that good.