Calling Time on Wine - the next 100 days after the first 100 day reset | Thread 3: Continuing to support and navigate together.

[needastrongone]

As promised, a new thread.

As the title states, this is the third thread. It started for those of us who wanted some support and a safe place to navigate a 100 day alcohol reset. Most of us on the thread wanted more time and space than Dry January to fully reset and maybe reflect more on our relationship with alcohol than one month.

What we also found was the most wonderfully supportive and uplifting set of folk, all with the common intention of being AF from January for 100 days. A few blips along the way for some (including me at the beginning) but for those that have, we’ve tried to understand why they happened and most of us have continued to be AF going forward and managed 100 AF days since January.

We are going for another 100 (we all liked the idea of breaking being AF into chunks of time) and I don’t think it matters one bit if new folk want to climb on board and start from here, we can all offer a friendly and non judgmental place here.

I’m generally finding life very full on at the moment so would love to reach for the wine to escape. But I KNOW that will make the stress even harder to deal with!

Anyways, another day sober in the bag. Night all!

Morning all, day 15 here. NGL I really fancied wine last night and the night before, but didn't. Last night I did the ironing instead and by the time I'd done that it was getting quite late and the craving had passed anyway. Day 15 today and tonight will be easy as we're off to the cinema.

I've also been waking up feeling groggy @PeacheyPeachboth this morning and yesterday morning. Exhausted in the evenings too. We've been on the go the last couple of long weekends so maybe that's why but it's very annoying as I've been tired to do my wind down routine.

Hope everyone is doing well. I think we can all relate to those feeling of shame mentioned above.

Morning all hope you've all had a good sleep and woke up feeling refreshed!
Checking in on day 26 , my initial challenge is 36 days which I will move further when I hit that target x
Have got a bottomless brunch coming up in a few weeks, have been online to have a look at the menu, think I will just have the sparkling 0.0 wine that's on offer,
Just wondering if anyone else has gone to one of these while doing alcohol free and if you have any tips on how to survive it !!!

hello . I did it . my black tie work event .

I had a playsuit on a sneaked 2 alcohol free gin and tonics in so I didn't have to drink water .

chatted , helped clear the room at the end .

left just after 11 to get the last ISH train home .

still tried as anything but not hungover

Morning @Lilly11a well done, glad you had a good night. Each time I go out now without drinking it reinforces the fact that alcohol doesn't improve a event or occasion for me anyway I like to have my wits about me.
@PeacheyPeach do they do mocktails? Id work my way through them and enjoy the food and company. You may notice that people become a bit annoying as they get progressively drunk.
@freshstart2026 if life is a bit hectic at the moment alcohol will just add to that stress as you say yourself. I take some time out now to meditate or just lay on my bed and focus on my breath even just 15 minutes seems to calm my nervous system down.

I've ordered a bottle of botivo for a get together I'm having this weekend I've not tried it before but the description sounds nice.

Also, is anyone else struggling with the effects of caffeine? I used to drink about 4 cups a day. After about 2 cups now I'm jittery and a bit anxious it may be because my brain chemistry is changing.

@Lilly11a I'm loving the idea of you smuggling in two cans in 😂, did you enjoy the evening, I bet you loved leaving knowing you were absolutely going to be fine the next day aswell
@Icecreamhelps yes I've had a look at the menu and they do a few mocktails,plus af beers and sparkling 0.0 wine so I think I've got some good options, also these af options are unlimited as well for the brunch so I'm going to have lots of different things to try,
I know that I can get up and have a dance and have a laugh without drinking,have that ,I'm going with a group of friends who really know me so I don't have to put my face on with them so hopefully it should be good, I've a few weeks off for that yet
With regards to coffee I used to drink so much of it, even till about dinner time, now I can only handle two cups a day and anymore I feel really sick, I'm mid 40s so it could be an age /hormone thing for me xx

Morning all, so this morning I look a lot less bloated. Last year when I did two months AF I remember suddenly looking like I'd lost half a stone even though my weight hadn't changed. I posted on here about it (on a different thread) and this morning I scrolled back through to find how long I'd been AF when that happened. Weirdly it was around day 16 - exactly the same day as today!

Surely that can't be a coincidence?? Anyway, hoping this is what I needed to keep me on the straight and narrow as there's definitely been some temptation lately and flat moods!

@Lilly11a love the idea of you sneaking in AF tins as well - I've done the same before and if I hadn't and been stuck with lemonade all night I'd have been tempted to press the fuck it button. I've got an event next Friday where I plan on doing the same and sneaking in some flavoured sparkling water as there will be glasses of wine and prosecco on offer.

Morning @paintcolourchart hope the flat mood lifts soon. You did well to ride the craving the other night with ironing. Distraction definitely helps.

Morning.

@Beachtastic - I like that you’ve channelled your energy into fitness and health, it definitely feels like we are not therefore giving something up, rather replacing alcohol with something positive.

@PeacheyPeach I haven’t done a bottomless brunch, but I’ve done a few socials. I find I am fed up with folk going from sober to tipsy to drunk and repeating themselves and generally not being as funny as they think after a couple of hours (I was one of those people, don’t get me wrong!). I do find the conversation I have much more satisfying and I’m much more present, but I need to come home sooner rather than later, but I’m fine with that. I certainly don’t miss drinking in that context. Being honest though I have never been a big ‘out, out’ sort of person so this isn’t my biggest test.

Well done @Lilly11a!

@Icecreamhelps i wonder if it’s because you are generally less wired from the alcohol that caffeine now affects you more?

@paintcolourchart I wonder if your body now realises it doesn’t need to hold onto excess water to stay hydrated?

Doing okay here. I’m on an online course tonight and racing tomorrow so easy wins in terms of no temptation to drink.

Evening all, checking in on day 128!! I have absolutely no desire for wine 🤩 I got through the rugby tour completely alcohol free and drove over 700 miles throughout the weekend! Could I have done that with a hangover.. absolutely not. ExH made a complete joke of himself drinking the boot of his car stash of red wine and vanished Sunday am.. today he called up like nothing had happened and I completely lost my sh*t with him. The gaslighting was top drawer-nothing changes. I told him to take a long hard look at himself and keep away from me and the boys. I was responsible for not only my own two teens but three others as well. Him getting obliterated with two known heavy drinkers was a recipe for disaster.. 🤯 it’s reconfirmed why I don’t drink anymore. Seeing the things from the other side is a real eye opener that’s for sure. All the other parents managed to behave, he’s played it all down like it wasn’t an issue which infuriated me. @paintcolourchart the puffiness is quite noticeable isn’t it! @Icecreamhelps interesting you mentioned caffeine, I’ve had to calm right down as I’m finding anymore than two coffees and I’m like a Tasmanian Devil 🤣

Morning all , well that was a quick week wasn't it! I love a four day school week!! Hope everyone is doing ok, anyone got social plans for the weekend and how are you planning on managing it? We have a few people coming over on Saturday, I'm going to do some picky bits I think and that way I can fill up on my favorite foods usually I skip the food and just drink so that will make a nice change! I tried one of Dhs AF lagers yesterday it was nice, I think it would definitely scratch an itch on a sunny afternoon anyway!

@therockingbird wow 128 days is just awesome you have done amazing and I'm in awe of your sticking to your plans on your weekend , it must have helped seeing your exh making a show of himself and not wanting to be a part of that, it's so lovely to be able to stay level headed and fully aware of everything isn't it especially if others around you are getting out of hand x

Morning all. I have a lunch tomorrow and was telling a work mate about it. She asked if I’d be tempted to have a cheeky drink and for the first time ever, it hadn’t crossed my mind. Weeks ago I had looked at the menu and spotted they do an af aperil spritz type drink so thought I’d try that.
So I’m taking my instant reaction as a positive. I feel like a non drinker now however I just tell people I’m on a break as otherwise you get the comments. ( Oh yes you were always pissed/ you started to look like a drinker/ how much WERE you drinking etc)
Ive said it before, but I really don’t know how I used to get through life being so hungover most of the time and I really really don’t know why I put myself through that!!
Have a great weekend all.

I get that @swifty. Navigating people’s reactions to saying you don’t drink is a tricky one. I found myself explaining that alcohol is no good for me and how much better I felt.. I wanted to scream I was on the brink of being a full blown alcoholic 😆 People tend to be curious and I totally understand that - but it’s a tricky subject when you’re trying to stay in your lane. I need to come up with a short sharp sentence that cuts them dead.

A friend of mine once joked darkly, "Never trust someone who says they USED to drink." I haven't seen him for years and we're planning a catch-up next year. I've warned him that I am now that person!

Yes I get this also, I think because I'm known for having a drink, always with a big glass of wine in hand, it's a shock for people if I'm not going to be drinking, especially for my family as we all have a few drinks when we get together, I worry that they are going to have something to say about it, I don't really want to start going into how I feel about alcohol or the dependency that comes with it, so I need to just come up with something short and sweet!

I’m in my 5th month dry, I’ve lost track of time now. I just say alcohol makes me really tired and I want to enjoy whatever without struggling to stay awake.

@SwiftyFifty I also feel like a non drinker now. I feel so relieved and happy to be free from the self destructive routine of drink, rinse repeat.
I was so ill and depressed that I just tell people it doesn't agree with me anymore and I'm much happier not drinking. They can't really argue with that because I am. The subject usually changes quickly and at this point most of my family and friends know I no longer drink so it's not an issue now.

Day 128 for me today - and I had to add up to figure that out. I'm no longer counting day by day. Well done to all of us trying to stick with it.

I find most people aren't really that interested in whether others drink or not.

Tried the botivo drink last night I wasn't really impressed for the price the switchel I made a while ago was nicer so going to make some more.
@anewyearthisyear I agree most people don't even question it, and those that do just accept whatever answer you give. If people do have an issue with anyone quitting alcohol I think it's because it might highlight their own relationship with it.
If anyone is lurking here and considering trying 100 days you honestly won't regret it, each morning I wake up so grateful that I found this group and made the decision to give it a go. Life still has its challenges but I'm a much calmer, stronger person now.

I was thinking that for me I have changed my mindset completely and I enjoy mornings now and have replaced a “ good, fun” evening ( ie getting pissed at home alone and spending all next day in a ball of misery on the sofa) with positive mornings. I’m still catching myself thinking for an instant ( like committing to baking a cake to bring to my friends for dinner tomorrow) “oh but I might be feeling rough and regret saying I’d make one” to knowing that I one hundred per cent won’t be and tomorrow I can enjoy the whole day too. It’s little things like this this keep me going ( oh and also the fact I’ve lost 11.5 pounds so far)
My son rolled in at 4.30 so whilst he got the absolute most out of yesterday, today is totally lost for him

Good morning all, beautiful day here and I’m as fresh as a daisy. What a feeling! Now headache and no regrets from the night before. I absolutely love this feeling ☺️ I used to be the life and soul - glass in hand kinda girl so for friends to see me sipping lime and soda is odd for them (not me).

I had some friends over to the beach hut last night and decided not to buy alcohol which was a first. Normally we’d be sipping wine at sundown - always a bottle of something in the pantry cupboard ☺️ not anymore! No one seemed to mind and we had a cuppa and a chippy tea.

I have a full on tasks weekend planned so I’m grateful for being up early and ready to submerge into some tasks. Teens still fast asleep so I’ll leave them be until lunchtime.

I hope the weather where you are is a glorious as it is here this morning. Have a great weekend all xx

Had a " blip" last weekend
I can't explain my thought processes but I bought a bottle of wine.. definitely going to drink sensibly...bank holiday, been stressful recently...
Nope
Back to all my old habits, thinking when to get the next bottle, how early is too early to have a drink.
To say it was disappointing is an understatement, no " magic remedy" or euphoria..so straight back on the wagon with a reminder to myself that I felt much better AF. I'm not starting the numbers again, although was truthful on the Try Dry App and am chalking this down to experience.
On a positive note I am slowly recognising that alcohol no longer serves me.

Oh and I've bought all 3 of the Three Spirit drinks, will report back on my experience with them. They come in Livener, Social and Nightcap varieties.