Oh the lies! What gets me isn't so much the lies themselves, but the fact that they truly think we will and should believe them despite the booze on the breath, the hideous mess of a house, the abuse that happened last time, the empty bottles/cans. To me it's the same as them just looking at us and saying "You are so stupid". If they seem to believe their lies themselves, I still think they know deep down they are lies.
My last go round with this was DH lying to me that 'the house looks just like it did when you left' so I sent him recent pictures I had taken, including the unspeakable filth in the bathroom. He said "You're the one with Coeliac, you made that mess when you got glutened". So I sent pictures that I took just after I left* showing a clean bathroom. And he came back with "How do I know when that picture was taken?". I gave up at that point but I know he knows the truth.
So DH has now had 2 weeks of 'enforced' sobriety (ie no ability to get alcohol). He most likely won't be released for another week as they want to be sure the staph infection is completely gone. He sounds pretty much like his 'good old self' before his drinking spun out of control. Oddly enough that has been sort of upsetting to me because I sense myself feeling hope, and I don't want to. I'm thinking now that my nightmare and resulting upset was my subconscious reminding me that there was more to my leaving than just his drinking and that simply being sober (should that happen) won't be enough for me to go back.
*thank you BFF for insisting I photo the house right after I left and then again recently.