The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

@endlesswashing you've made me smile- I'm sat here catching up on the thread whilst drinking tea and eating chocolate digestives! You enjoy your snacks my lovely, it's much, much better than drinking, and congrats on 3 weeks, that's flipping brilliant. Enjoy your quit lit too, and if you get any chores done too then that's an added bonus x

Checking in shipmates!
A bit of hopeful news for my fellow biscuit lovers. I’ve eaten A LOT of sugar over the last couple of months but some sort of balance does seem to have been restored as the scales are showing a whopping 5lbs of weight loss since I stopped alcohol.
I lost a couple of stone nearly two years ago and have managed not to put all of it back on even when drinking (probably because I often substituted dinner for alcohol) but the scales had crept up a good 10lbs anyway.
So I think my body might be settling down a bit now. Day 69 for me!

Ahoy there, shipmates! Last night, for no apparent reason, I suffered a bad wine craving. It started as a 'crap food' craving, and then morphed into a wine craving. I was 'safe' as there is no alcohol in the house, but it wasn't pleasant. Retrospectively, I probably should have given into the 'crap food' craving and raided my husband's cake store. Anyway, I rode both of them out.

A nice day today wandering round a market town about an hour's drive away - my usual haul of charity shop bargains, and coffee in Cafe Nero to warm ourselves up.

Stopped off on the way home to get a haggis for dinner - love a haggis - having it with tatties and shredded cabbage as I'm not a 'neeps' fan.

Well done! When I was drinking, I used to get so frustrated after eating sensibly all week and then finding the scales hadn't moved - I don't know why I imagined the calories in two or three bottles of wine, or 7 or 8 bottles of real ale, or both, would magically go nowhere - one of many delusions, alas.

This was exactly me!! Couldn't understand why I was putting on weight despite all my food being healthy and in a deficit. The 1000s of booze calories didn't count in my head 🙈

To those eating swede the mumsnet microwave trick does work.
Piece like a jacket spud, microwave in a plastic tub for 20-25 mins. Halve and scoop out. Loads of butfer.

Evening sober shipmates !
Just a quick shout of for a wee find for me today. Now I do NOT like sweet or fruity AF drinks but I have been partial to the Aldi 0% Chardonnay. Tonight they only had the blush. Eeeeew I thought but picked it up anyway as needed an AF wine with nibbles tonight. Wow absolutely love it! Smells gorgeous and tastes great with cheeses and nibbles and it’s only £2.99 x def worth a try x

Evening everyone! Hope you've had a good Saturday.

@Lavrander and @ThistimeImdone I'm glad to see some other fans of the Boss on here! He just seems like one of life's good guys, despite his celebrity status. I love the fact that he and his wife Patti were band members for years before they decided to become a couple, and now they've been married for a long time. I admire people with stable lives (though I also sympathise with people who have unstable ones!).

@carpetburn I'm so glad your appointment went well, and that your DS's appointment also went smoothly, @eekwhatnow .

@REP22 Sid is a such a sweetheart as always. Love that photo.

@FiloPasty Lucky Saint on tap - I've never seen that before! Fabulous.

@PhantomOfAllKnowledge congratulations for fending off the wine witch last night.

I'm feeling good today; I went for a gentle jog for the first time since October. The problem is, I now feel exhausted, and we're meant to go round to the neighbours for drinks, alas. I'll bring a couple of my Lucky Saint bottles and hope the evening doesn't last too long. (I'm so much fun, me.) Actually the neighbours are lovely, so I'm sure that once I get there, I'll be glad I went.

I have a massive teaching day on Monday and I've done no prep at all today yet. I have to start it early tomorrow so that anxiety and the desire to drink don't set in. (Note that 'early' for me means any time before lunch; I'm not a morning person.)

I would love to lose some weight but I'm just focusing on sobriety at the moment and trying not to pay too much attention to the scales.

I'm trying to change the narratives I tell myself in my head about myself and my drinking. I want to move away from 'I have relapsed so many times! I can't do this!' to something more like, 'I'm a good person, I'm doing fine, I deserve to take care of myself, I will be kind to myself even when I feel like I'm struggling with life, I will love myself instead of giving myself a drink'. Cheesy but I'll see how it goes. I think so many of my drinking urges come from the recurring feeling that I'm inadequate in some way. I drink in order to try to shut out those thoughts, but in fact it makes the feelings of inadequacy loom even larger.

I even bought a journal as I thought it might be helpful to write a bit every day. Haven't written anything in it yet though.

Strength and courage all.

Certainly won't be craving crap food tonight as my haggis has left me absolutely stuffed 😊

@elusivehope You're absolutely right to fight one battle at a time. I ate whatever I needed to to get through the early months of no alcohol. You have the rest of your sober life to make other healthy changes, when you feel ready and if you want to. I'm still smoking, but I'm just not ready to quit at this stage.

I love your compassionate thought process @elusivehope I definitely think it's something that comes with sobriety for a lot of us. Realising that we deserve to be feel well, healthy, stable and content. Thanks for sharing the Bruce Springsteen song earlier this week. Very emotional.
Jealous of your haggis @PhantomOfAllKnowledge had some last week at a Burns night celebration and it was delicious.
I celebrated the end of January with a huge slice of Basque cheesecake.
Now to be watch a film with some non-alcoholic beers. Have a great sober weekend all.

I'm equally jealous of your cheesecake @Teaforthetotal !

Morning lads. I had a nice surprise last night and am feeling quite proud of myself, and you're the only people I know who I can tell who will care/understand! We went for dinner before a comedy gig last night. It was a chain restaurant that he particularly likes. I was mostly a wine drinker previously, but had a penchant for a particular cider they serve there, and previously, on arrival at said restaurant I would anxiously scan the bar or the menu to make sure they still had it. Ashamedly I was more interested in that than the lovely food. Anyway, last night, it wasn't until we were sat at the comedy gig afterwards that I realised I hadn't even thought about that cider, not once. I was so chuffed with myself I actually high-fived the air! Topped off with not having to queue for drinks at the gig or need the loo in the interval, and up early today with no headache. Loving being AF. Just need to work on this biscuit addiction now!

Sorry, wrote all that before I'd caught up on the messages. Flipping well done @PhantomOfAllKnowledge for not giving in to the cravings, that's amazing. I feel bad for congratulating myself on not having a craving last night, but goodness me I had so many in my first few weeks and months. Last night was the very first time I've gone out and not felt jealous of other people's drinks. Cravings are so hard, and you didn't even give in to the cake! I agree with you about the scales and the calories, same here.
I too love your thought process @elusivehope Be kind to yourself, you deserve it x

Shame they can’t master red. Bought Sainsbury’s Shiraz 0% today. Oversweet grape juice.

Morning all. I’m feeling very emotionally vulnerable today. I know a bottle of wine would temporarily fill this void but leave me feeling horrific.

Lots of people will end Dry Jan today but I’m not intending to.

IWNDWYT

Oh and as for AF alternatives - Gordon’s 0% is just not ‘it’. I’m tempted to pour it down the sink.

Morning all.
Up a little easier with a solid unbroken sleep.
I'm on antibiotics too with a very scary two page warning leaflet.

I've never bought the aldi af wine but i will today. I'm off out phone buying as this baby is nearing its end.

Another busy week whilst we wait for the DS to exchange and complete on his house. My shopping bill will be reduced substantially!

Morning all.
@TheMentalMentalLoad - sorry you’re feeling vulnerable. Ask yourself: what do I need today? Hint - it really won’t be a bottle of wine.

It may be hard watching people finish Dry January, but really- they’re missing out on the good bit. It takes 60+ days to break a habit, and about 100 days for your brain chemistry to adjust after stopping drinking.

And as @IChooseTo says - it starts getting easier after a while

Oh @TheMentalMentalLoad sending you a big hug. You’re right that it would be temporary. Yesterday I took a tip I learned here and played forward having that sip of red wine I was wanting. Remembered how I immediately would only then be able to think about the next one and also how I would feel disappointed the next day and lose this safe feeling I have at the moment. It did really help.
i like the Tanqueray zero gin. A bit more but worth it.
And I like the M&S divan red wine - you just have to not expect actual wine!!
@IChooseTo that’s so brilliant.
@elusivehope sounds perfect. In case it’s helpful my wellness journal it gets you to write some intentions each morning and then a little reflection of how the day went and note some gratitudes each evening. Coming back twice a day keeps me focussed.

@TheMentalMentalLoad Think of something nice you can do for yourself to fill the void today; could you go out anywhere pleasant, or stay home and have a pampering session - long bath/shower, deep condition of hair, face mask, that kind of thing? Find a film/book/podcast to settle down with?

I know quite a few 'Dry January' people who have kept on with their new habits because they've just found life better, either staying completely on the dry or becoming 'occasional only' drinkers. I don't have it in me to be an occasional drinker, that's something important I have had to accept about myself.

Ouch, woke up with heartburn this morning. That's new to me, must be all the over eatting! Well, I'll take that as a warning and try to eat a bit better today.

I bought a some 0% drinks in aldi yesterday too. Pink gin can, g&t can and some fruit ciders. I enjoyed the pink gin can and fruit cider. Still need to try the other gin. I've been drinking a lot of tea, favoured sparkling water cans and ribena.

Had a pamper day yesterday, painted my nails, body scrub lots of moisturiser. Treated myself to the drinks and a new lip balm. Might sound silly but it felt very self indulgent. Today I need to be a grown up and get the jobs done I put off yesterday so we are ready for the new week.

Have a good day all.

Thank you for the support. I’m with my DC visiting family and doing a bit of shopping today. This too shall pass.

I’m on the train on my way home after an absolutely brilliant weekend - totally alcohol free! I drank Lucky Saint (on tap everywhere in London) and AF cocktails whilst everyone else shared prosecco and at no point did I feel deprived or excluded. I’ve learnt I can be funny and sociable and and have the time of my life and I don’t need alcohol to help me do that.
I’m on cloud nine. A weekend to remember 💜

Amazing news! And the best is yet to come - you won't spend Monday feeling hungover and haunted by 'the fear' of how you might have come across when under the influence. You can start the week feeling refreshed and happy.