The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Good morning.
I'm up with the lark.

I've had Alpen and emptied the dishwasher which doesn't get loaded everyday now the DS has moved. He ate so much.
He's also whipped a few things from my kitchen!

We've got a week to 'stage' the house and donate a lot of linen. It fills a room.

@elusivehope it is a hard journey down the sober road. Tbh if you fall off the wagon the quicker you stop the better. Someone at AA once told me if you fall down do not drink on day two as your body will start to change your tolerance.
I tested it once, they were right!
As you say you've built a different life as an adult and that's worth protecting.
Have you read sober Dave? There's a chapter on adult children of alcoholics. It summed up my DS perfectly. The need to control, the huge disappointment they feel.
All of us are a work in progress. Alcohol dependacy is a lapsing condition.
We do not need the booze and it doesn't serve us.
Brighter days and a calm and peaceful life are out there.

Morning all. I went to sleep at 7.30 last night and slept through until 6! I must have needed it. Didn't get the work done I needed ready for today but I can't do everything and in the grand scheme of all things, it doesn't really matter.
Welcome back @elusivehopeI'm glad you're still here and making a go of it. What a lovely gift from your son and so very thoughtful. The descriptors have made me feel even more like you're a woman I'd enjoy a cup of tea with.

We're almost down to the last page- Shall we think about starting up a new one?

Morning all
I am also a big fan of the NYT games app @elusivehope - I do Wordle and Connections every morning, and spelling bee most days. The American references in Connections make it much harder - referees do not wear stripes in the Uk! (Yes, I’m still bitter about that a month later)
Good thought @Lavrander - who would like to host? I’m happy to, but equally happy not to!

@Onewildandpreciouslife would you host please?

I'm a bit wobbly health wise so wouldn't want to let anyone down.

Good afternoon shipmates,

Late on today as work meetings started early. @elusivehope - that Connections game sounds lovely, what a lot of thought and effort went into that. I occasionally venture onto a site called Puzzgrid, which has connection walls like those on Only Connect. They're quite addictive.

I don't mind hosting again if you don't want to @Onewildandpreciouslife?

I watched the Manosphere documentary over the weekend. It was well done by Louis Theroux but deeply disheartening. Revolting individuals, the lot of them. Horrible that the girls with them looked distinctly uncomfortable - at least the mum had the grace to look slightly ashamed of her son. @Lavrander is right - and they will never know the true value of real, selfless love.

Strength and courage. x

If you don’t mind doing another stint I’d be very grateful @REP22 - thank you

I watched Manosphere last night too @REP22, nasty, revolting individuals indeed. The rise of the likes of Andrew Tate and other incel freaks of nature have a lot to answer for. The older I get, the angrier misogyny makes me.

Good to have you back @elusivehope, a blip does not define us. Back on the sober saddle.

New thread here for when the time comes... The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring into Summer 2026 | Mumsnet - everyone welcome. 🙂x

Afternoon, shipmates, and snuggles to Sid!

I dip in and out, as I often feel I have nothing to add. It's 107 days since the last drink of my 'blip' and over 8 years since I stopped drinking every night. That's not at all interesting, and I'm aware that people want to talk about getting sober, and I can't really say much about that these days.

In case anyone has joined since I last said it, anyone stopping needs to take high doses of Thiamine (Vitamin B1) for at least 6 weeks, to help prevent brain damage caused by alcohol. Most people have heard me say that 100 times, though 🥳.

I do read regularly, and am genuinely interested in everyone's progress, it's just that I feel a bit out of the loop a lot of the time.

Oh, and thanks @REP22 for taking the helm again. You do more than your share on here x

I feel the same in a way, try to pop in and always interested to read everyone’s news. @ShyMaryEllen it is interesting to all of us. It really propelled me in the early days to hear from those who’d made it through so to speak.

My only thing to note 6 months in is that for a long time I was really worried how I’d just swapped alcohol for alcohol free options, obviously that was a positive change but something felt a bit odd about it. That I still had such an ingrained habit.
Anyway that’s changed, slowly new habits have have formed and I just don’t really think about it unless it’s some type of celebration and I want to have an alternative.

This is the longest I’ve been sober since I was 14. For those chasing Try Dry stickers, did you tick off your Mothers Day badge? X

Ha @FiloPasty - there are a lot more missions than when I started! I hadn’t realised there was a Mother’s Day one.

I agree about the AF options - I found them very helpful in the early days, then gradually switched off. I do still like an Af G&T in the evening occasionally, but often don’t bother.

The thread ebbs and flows through the year- it’s at its best when there is a good mix of those just starting out, who can share the highs and lows of the early days, and the “veterans”, who can say yes it’s completely normal to experience X, Y and Z. Sometimes we just keep it ticking over so it’s near the top of the Alcohol Support board in case someone decides this is their last day one, and needs someone to hold their hand and tell them it will be all right, that they can do it, and you don’t need to worry today about what you’ll drink at your DD’s wedding if she’s only 6 ….

Thanks so much everyone for all the supportive words. Gosh I love this thread. Huge thanks to you @REP22 for hosting the new thread again!

Day 3 done. Headache gone but I feel heavy and lethargic. Also consumed vast quantities of mother's day chocolate, which may perchance have contributed to the feeling of heaviness 😳Went to an academic reading group but couldn't think of much to say. Marked some essays, working at a snail's pace. Tomorrow I need to tackle an email back log. I'm just taking things slowly.

Thanks @WendyWagon for the sober Dave rec; I'll check him out. As you say you've built a different life as an adult and that's worth protecting. Thanks for that comment; I'll hold onto it!

@lavrander I'd love to have a cup of tea with you! In my new rainbow mugs!

@Onewildandpreciouslife glad to meet another NYT games fan! I'm rubbish at Connections, because even though I grew up in the US, I watched no sports and very little telly, so absolutely loads of the references go over my head. I'm better at Spelling Bee, but Sam Ezersky (creator of the puzzle) makes a lot of very arbitrary choices about which words count as valid and which do not. I've discovered that several of my old uni friends from the US play it, and Sam Ezersky is the person they love to hate. Some days I get angry whatsapp messages from the US about words not being accepted that day. Catalytic! Deictic! (An important word for linguists.) Alchemical! (One scholar friend is an expert on Ben Jonson's play The Alchemist and wrote to the NYT personally to complain about alchemical not counting as a word. 😂) What I can say, that game is geek heaven.

@REP22 I'm scared to check out Puzzgrid, the last thing I need is yet another puzzle addiction, ha!

@ShyMaryEllen I know that the theme of the thread is leading an AF life, as you say, but I really enjoy just hearing about the lives of people on the thread regardless of whether or not they are explicitly posting about being sober. It's encouraging to hear that people are no longer struggling every day not to pick up a drink: that they're just living their lives.

@FiloPasty that's amazing that you've done 6 months sober after drinking since age 14. Wow. You're an inspiration.

Wishing everyone a peaceful day tomorrow.

Diving in before the thread closes! Thank you for hosting again @REP22 - you were my first Cap’n and I so value your wildly encouraging, wise and amusing thoughts.
I’m a bit in the tumbrils (only found out what that meant recently, despite using the phrase for aeons, so am determined to shoehorn it in as frequently as possible!). Mum had a fall last week whilst shopping in Exeter. She’s broken her arm and has bruised ribs and a mashed up mouth/jaw. Poor thing, she went in to buy herself some new shoes and trousers and just fancied a nice little shopping trip. She was rushed into A&E and somewhat unbelievably, despite the X-ray showing a clear fracture, was discharged with just a blue band for support. So I’ve pretty much been staying there for the last week, having to come home to pick up essentials. I took her back to the fracture clinic where they finally put the arm in plaster (it had been an “oversight” to not set it in the first place FFS). So I’m trying to be a ministering angel - a role for which I am fundamentally unsuited. I’m great in a crisis, when I can DO things, and anticipate and be practical and effective. I am not great at the sitting around “caring”, with endless cups of tea and sympathy. My limited capacity to care is focused entirely on my little dog, and there is nothing left over for anyone/anything else. So it’s been a bit of a struggle - obviously far more so for her than me, but my struggle is valid too! She’s on morphine, so a bit confused, fairly incapacitated and deaf. I am surrounded by old, deaf, annoying people (see above mentioned little dog who is of course a little person) and my tolerance is wearing thin. However, one of the gifts of sobriety has been that I have been able to look after her - I could drive, do shopping, remember medications and conversations - none of which would have happened when I was drinking. At no point during the time I’m with her do I want a drink, but I did have the thought of how nice it would be to come home and get wrecked. It wasn’t the stressful time, but the anticipation of a relaxing time that triggered me. Anyway, I’m having a blissful 20 hours at home, on my own, speaking to no-one - which is bloody perfect!
I’m a bit late to this particular party, so will just add my voice to the choir - please don’t go @WendyWagon - and @ShyMaryEllen - I value your inputs so much, and you are both inspiring. I hit 18 months a couple of weeks ago, and it’s wisdom like yours that helps keep me trudging along the path to happy destiny 😃

Lovely to hear from you @Carpetburn . I'm sorry to hear about your mum! You sound like a bloody saint. I would make a lousy nursemaid. I think I need more 'alone time' than most people do; spending a lot of hours with someone (even a loved one) would exhaust me pretty fast. I'm glad you're home now!

Also, just a word to say that the new thread is already going strong! I posted on here two nights ago and then realised when I woke up that all the traffic had moved on to the new thread. 😁

Oh gosh, I meant to tag @FaithHopeCarnage in the above post and I tagged @Carpetburn instead! Apologies to both of you for the the confusion!

Ah, thank you @elusivehope! I’m always one step behind 😂

Hi glad to have found this thread. It’s been a month for me and this time I have stopped with intention to really stop. It’s so far going well. And really hope that continues. Slightly scared of the very boozy work parties coming up … I am never great with crowded rooms and I have some fairly intimidating colleagues

to check from an earlier post - how much is considered the high dose of VIt b 1 that is needed for 6 weeks post stopping? I already take a multi and have for years that already has a standard decent dose. But I think probably fine to take extra just don’t know how much. Thanks!🙏

Welcome @Sunshinebound99 - glad you’ve found us. This thread is nearly full, so there is a new shiny “Spring into Summer” thread - please do come onto the new thread

New thread

Well done on getting to 1 month! I hear you on the boozy work parties. But what I would say is that we probably learned at quite a young age that alcohol overcame our initial shyness and it seemed a miraculous way to overcome our insecurities- but we’ve come a long way since then. If you don’t drink at a work party the first 10 minutes will feel more awkward BUT I have found that after that it’s actually easier, because you are genuinely engaging with people and you don’t need to constantly watch yourself (have I drunk too much? Am I being too loud? Am I boring this person?). Just make sure you have a plan so you can leave when you want to

@ShyMaryEllen is the best person to ask about vitamins (but she’s on the new thread too so come and say hi)