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Alcohol support

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The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026

994 replies

REP22 · 07/01/2026 11:35

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the ones I use, I Am Sober and TryDry. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.
Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

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elusivehope · 07/01/2026 23:11

Thanks so much for the lovely intro post @REP22 and for taking over the helm.

And thanks so much for your marvellous hosting of the last two threads, @lavrander !

@Becky3825 you're coping with so much, I hope you feel better soon and that one of your job applications finally bears fruit!

@ThatCleverFox congratulations on your first day. That's fantastic. Reading your post brought a smile to my face.

I'm on day 6. Am really thinking of getting an AA sponsor again because I can't seem to go more than a week or ten days without relapsing. I'm just going to a few AA meetings on a regular basis at the moment and looking for someone who isn't too focused on religion-based recovery. That said I went to a meeting tonight and there was a reading from the Big Book about God, and then virtually everyone who shared, shared about their religious faith. I have nothing against religious faith, I respect it a lot, but I know it's not the right path for me. So it's tricky.

Anyway I really appreciate these threads, because there is so much support and practical wisdom here. And I think I really am making progress despite the relapses. I can see from the Reframe app that I've had many more sober days than drinking days since I joined the threads last summer.

Part of what has made me want to drink are feelings of shame/guilt/inadequacy. These threads have helped me feel those feelings less. Thank you all and do keep going, whatever stage you've reached!

And oh yeah @ShyMaryEllen that woman at your gym class is a twat (sorry, but she is). If she tried to mess with me I think I would tell her politely that I prefer to be left alone, thank you very much! I can't stand bossy people.

That said my book group has a couple of bossy members, and one rang me this week to complain about something book-group-related (I won't go into detail because it's boring, but she was unhappy about the order we were reading the books in over the upcoming months ... yes, really! ... and wanted my support). I was very polite but kept repeating, 'My preference is...' and 'I think the majority preference is... but you're welcome to propose your idea to the other members if you want to', etc. etc. I felt that because I was sober and clear-headed, I was able to be both firm and kind. I felt quite cross though about how bossy she was being. Lo and behold, later that evening she texted me and said talking to me had been helpful and she had decided to go with the group consensus! I was pleasantly amazed... small victories! I normally find it difficult to disagree with people, but sometimes you CAN disagree with them and it turns out all right. Like @lavrander 's story of the bloke without headphones!

TwoNicePuppies · 07/01/2026 23:40

Well done @ThatCleverFox it only takes one day, then one more day, then one more…..you can do this.

ThatCleverFox · 07/01/2026 23:42

TwoNicePuppies · 07/01/2026 23:40

Well done @ThatCleverFox it only takes one day, then one more day, then one more…..you can do this.

Thank you @TwoNicePuppies ❤️ I am looking forward to day 2 xx

TwoNicePuppies · 07/01/2026 23:46

Post if you’re tempted, reading this thread has been a godsend, day 10 for me tomorrow which feels almost unbelievable - double figures!! Which is where you’ll be on 16th Jan. 💜

WhatMaggieDid · 07/01/2026 23:58

Reporting in at the end of the day.
@ThatCleverFoxI’ve been blitzing the office here too! Inspired by The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning I’ve been through everything and cleared out so much useless old admin I had to have a bonfire in the yard! Very therapeutic.
Had an M&S meal with DH and DS1 tonight before traitors - accompanied by a Becks Blue.
Feeling very pleased with the day and hoping for a good nights sleep 😴

ThatCleverFox · 08/01/2026 00:08

TwoNicePuppies · 07/01/2026 23:46

Post if you’re tempted, reading this thread has been a godsend, day 10 for me tomorrow which feels almost unbelievable - double figures!! Which is where you’ll be on 16th Jan. 💜

@TwoNicePuppies I will definitely post here if I wobble - you all seem so supportive 🩷 Although I haven’t had any yet (probably still got wine flowing through my veins!) it is the withdrawal symptoms that are worrying me. My dad was an alcoholic and suffered the worst withdrawal symptoms I’ve ever witnessed. I’m terrified that if I get them, that will push me to have a drink. That’s why I have been tapering as my gp told me that I must NOT go cold turkey but I felt ready to stop today xx

TwoNicePuppies · 08/01/2026 00:29

@ThatCleverFox I think it’s inspiring that you did the sensible thing and went to your GP, I wasn’t brave enough to do that due to shame & being too worried they’d test my liver & I don’t want to know. Stupid I know. If you haven’t read it I suggest Allen Carr’s ‘The easy way to control alcohol’ I read it in December whilst attempting to moderate (I did but still 20 units some days!) & when I took my final drink on 29th I knew it was my last. I was terrified of the DTs too, I won’t lie, the first few nights weren’t fun, but I pushed through & now I’m just eating half my body weight in rubbish from 5pm (getting the sugar fix I used to get from drink) & vivid dreams. It’s a hard few days but worth it.

mummygranny · 08/01/2026 01:02

Hello this is the first group I have come across since I stopped drinking will be ten months on January 14th.
my husband has liver disease and a long story which is his and mine I found he still drunk if I did so I had to stop or he will die.
it was not that easy and the last year has been a nightmare however maybe over time I can tell . Let’s just say he too has now been sober for five months .
i was worried about Christmas you know those drinks that as a drinker you dint even consider as alcohol the Baileys the Bucks Fizz The Sherry Trifle I could go on they were the hardest to not have . Anyway so I have now in these 10 months done a number of trips away in our caravan , two weddings , now Christmas and the biggest a music festival. You know what if we are absolutely honest enjoyed them all more and was more present . This is the first time I have shared any of this . I lie I told my mum when I was six months sober she replied … how boring …so thank you for being there .
for those of you starting out I never before managed a dry January or November but can honestly say it is so worth it we can all do this xx

TwoNicePuppies · 08/01/2026 04:26

Congratulations @mummygranny 10 months is a brilliant achievement, you must be so proud of yourself, & 5 for your husband too, well done to him! I have enablers in my life too, calling me boring for doing Dry Jan (I haven’t told them yet that I’ve stopped completely!) but it’s my life, not theirs so f* them!! I’m only 10 days in, but I did my first sober New Year since I was a child, have you got the ‘Try Dry’ app? I’m enjoying ticking off the ‘missions’ as well as seeing the days increase!

Lavrander · 08/01/2026 07:11

Morning everyone! Thank you @REP22for the new thread.
@mummygrannywelcome and thank you for sharing. I certainly don't find anything of what you e said boring. I'd have found being sober at a music festival FASCINATING and I would love to do it. My experience at festivals is of either being lost, bored, or stressed.
@ThatCleverFoxcongratulations on your day one. Have you downloaded the TryDry app? Would be helpful to makes notes on what you're experiencing to give you something to look back on when you're tempted.

@ThatCleverFoxand @WhatMaggieDid- fellow 'sorting all my shit out' lady over here! I'm trying to do just a little a day. There is someone I follow on instagram who posts videos on 'how long does it actually take' - so she says how long she's been procrastinating it for - say 8 months sorting out her paperwork, then times how long it takes to actually sort it - 22 minutes. It's given me a right kick up the bum.

Right - off to walk the dog - let's hope he doesn't pull me over on some ice.

eekwhatnow · 08/01/2026 07:52

Morning all!
@ThatCleverFox well done! You’ve got this. Sorting stuff out really helps!
@EastCoastDamsel tempted by the teas. Do you have to order them online or are they in any supermarkets?
@GribouilleI had a weird migraine last night too. Managed to half convince myself I had appendicitis weirdly Grin.
@mummygranny thanks for the inspiration, it really helps!
I had a better day yesterday despite the migraine. I’ve got some therapy lined up today which I started at the end of last year and looking forward to that. It’s awkward but I do think it helps. Otherwise my day out of the office so I’m home alone with my dog which I love!
Have a great day everyone.

eekwhatnow · 08/01/2026 08:06

@TwoNicePuppiesand @mummygranny by the way I’m with you on people being unsupportive. I’ve told as many people as possible to try and make myself accountable and I’m not sure a single one had anything positive to say. I got to the point when I was ready to chop the head off the next person who asked if I’d tried just cutting back as if that might never have occurred to me.

ThatCleverFox · 08/01/2026 08:23

Morning all 😊

Day 2!! Slept well but lots of dreams about travelling. I always have very vivid dreams or nightmares which really seem to reflect what’s going on with me so obviously I’m on a journey. I’ll go with that one.

@TwoNicePuppies and @Lavrander thanks for the app tips. I have downloaded trydry, Drinkaware, I am Sober and Reframe. I’m trialling them all but must say I am enjoying Reframe. I would of course as it’s the most expensive!!

I’m also listening to the Bubble Hour podcasts while i’m pottering about and I’ve started jigsaw. So I hope i’m building a robust toolkit, which includes you guys 🩷

Well, I’m off to groom a dog - wish me luck xx

WendyWagon · 08/01/2026 09:12

Good morning shipmates.

Tis my four year anniversary today🎊

I came on this thread three days later having not spent much time on MN since the nappy days.
It has been a lifeline for me and ive made such good friends on and offline.
If you told me I would not want 'my wine' at the end of the day i wouldn't have believed you.

These are my results:

My liver returned to normal in six weeks.

I'm 37kgs lighter

I saved my marriage (not sure if he'd have left me but he certainly didn't like me).

Had two major operations one of which saved my life. I dont think I'd have been fit for surgery or got them to see past my obesity as my stomach was huge.

Walked away from toxic jobs without major drama.

Found an inner calm mainly around knowing what i can change and what i can't. The serenity prayer works for me.

I drank 6 bottles of wine a week plus extras if entertaining. I spent big. A fussy drunk.

Ive had two major blips. One Christmas Eve and one BFFs birthday. Neither lasted more than the day.

People who havent seen me for a while are shocked i dont drink. Others are new friends that don't know anything different.

100 days was a huge milestone for me because i didnt think I could do it. Eight weeks was my longest since aged 14.

If I can do it so can you. With love and thanks to you all.

Onewildandpreciouslife · 08/01/2026 09:31

Morning all.
Many congratulations @WendyWagon 🎉🎉🎉 That’s an awesome list - it’s been an honour to travel on this journey with you.

Well done on your first night @ThatCleverFox - a big milestone!

Have you tried SMART meetings @elusivehope ? I’ve never tried AA, and I know it’s helped lots of people, but there’s a number of aspects that put me off. I’m a Christian and bizarrely one of the things that puts me off AA most is the “God part” 🤣

Sympathy to all those who aren’t finding others supportive - I think it makes a lot if people defensive

WendyWagon · 08/01/2026 09:38

@Onewildandpreciouslife thank you. I think you were holding the thread when i joined. Bunnies, drybird and many others were the vets.

The amount of support and friendship I've received has been heart warming. Lifes ups and downs have been going on but I've had the lads ( and Sid) to help me.

Gribouille · 08/01/2026 09:39

Woot woot! 🎉 Congratulations on your four years, @WendyWagon ! It helps and inspires to see the possibilities and successes laid out like that! I remember you extricating yourself from a toxic situation, and the increasing lightness of spirit as you calmly and clearly unpicked yourself from it... 🙂 My DH and I really seem to loathe each other when we're drinking, and that all dissipates when we don't... it's a hateful drug...

Hope your migraine's better today @eekwhatnow - amazing that we regularly and willingly did this to ourselves with alcohol... actually, often unwillingly, just couldn't resist it... 😔

I will stand-up slappy-fight anyone who claims that sobriety is boring - I had 5+ sober years to see that that is definitely NOT true. I know that I am boring when I drink, I've been bored to yawns by other drunks... The repetition, the pointless arguments... the evenings we said 'Let's watch this film! Play this game! Do something interesting!' And then Nah, let's just get pissed and sit doom-scrolling together...

Anyway, Day 5. Sleep still up and down but trending better, energy too... I know from experience not to overdo things at this stage, but dang, I'm getting my taste for life back... 😋

Gribouille · 08/01/2026 09:44

(Quick dive back into the last thread - no @FiloPasty , we don't have Paramount - just the Council Telly for us, I'm afraid - but my memories of Jean-Luc Picard remain evergreen in my battered memory to sustain me...) 😍😄

Adsy1988 · 08/01/2026 09:57

Congratulations on your four year anniversary @WendyWagon, truly an inspiration to those who are just starting out on their AF journey. You were one of the first posters I recognised when I started posting in these threads in 2023. Might have taken me a further two and a bit years to get properly sober, but this thread has been an absolute Godsend.

Wishing everyone a happy, and sober Thursday. Got a wee window of time this morning to catch up on this wonderful thread before getting into the nitty gritty of work. I normally hate January because I am so busy, not enough hours in the day to drink, so I was caning it whilst working too. This year is so different though. I don’t bounce out of bed buzzing to log on and see what’s facing me each day, but I also don’t want to bury myself in bed or go straight for last nights’ leftover wine to take the hangover/shakes away.

Onewildandpreciouslife · 08/01/2026 10:00

Oh I definitely wasn’t hosting @WendyWagon ! I was on wobbly Dry January legs at the time, and didn’t really crack it until Sober Spring in March 2022

WendyWagon · 08/01/2026 10:07

Ooh I shall try and find my first post . I probably said some nonsense like not sure if I drink too much! 😅

WhatMaggieDid · 08/01/2026 10:25

@Lavranderyes!!! I’ve been putting off the office and admin for ever, did it all yesterday and now feel incredibly organised but can’t quite believe it’s all in order so quickly and easily! Still have the loft to tackle though…🫣

@WendyWagonyou are my absolute inspiration 💕

I slept really well last night for the first time in weeks and only woke up briefly, rather than the two hour stint I have been doing between 3 and 5am. I’m looking forward to this improving. It’s funny having been here before, I know I have lots to look forward to - better sleep, feeling content, the pink cloud, clarity of thought - and I can remember what it felt like. I also remember the F@*k it feeling and I’m a bit scared of that again if I’m honest. I need a different strategy to deal with it.
But so far so good - woke up with a smile on my face and looking forward to the day.
IWNDT 💜

WhatMaggieDid · 08/01/2026 10:26

Just out of interest - how do you find your old posts?

TwoNicePuppies · 08/01/2026 10:48

🥳🎉🤩 HUGE congratulations @WendyWagon you & so many others on this thread are such an inspiration to us newbies. IWNDWYT 💜

WendyWagon · 08/01/2026 11:11

There you go folks. It was the ledgendry Bunnies.
As you can see I was not a calm bunny.

@WhatMaggieDid just advance search your old name. I used dates too.I

The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2026