I can't do this anymore

[Muppet11]

I've had enough. My wine consumption has gone to 2 bottles a night. I'm so sad and lonely but I need to stop. I've tried AA and hated it. It's the only thing that stops my mind but I know it will kill me.

Just need some support really, I have to do this or I know I will die :(

Hi @Muppet11 I was drinking a bottle or 2 a night not too long ago. I've never been to AA I'm not a people person or one for sharing. I'm on day 10 sober after a month of cutting down. If you're like me you've probably read through all the posts so I don't want to repeat advice that's already available. Im just here to say you are not the only person in this situation. Im here to listen if needed.

Thank you @Icecreamhelps yes I've read most of the posts on here. 10 days is great, well done!

Cutting down is hard for me because once I start I can't seem to stop. I dont have much money but I'm spending it all on wine. Even having it delivered!
Im disgusted with myself, can I join you on your sober journey?

I really need to do this, I feel awful today, still in bed, no energy. I look horrendous. Have so much to do but I can't face it.

Thank you for replying x

Oh god uber deliveries for wine! If I order bread, milk and eggs they won't think I'm an alcoholic. The shame is real. Of course you can join me. Could you muster up the energy to get a shower and sit on the sofa?

Sending you a hug. You can do this.

9 years ago I was drinking nearly a litre and a half of vodka a day during the week and twice as much at the weekend. I was never truly sober. The tipping point came when I did something when blind drunk that was so horrifying, I came within a whisker of losing everything dear to me.

i stopped. I haven’t had a drink since 2016 and although it was hell for a few weeks- withdrawal is not pleasant but you WILL get through it - in 6 months you will be a totally different person, I absolutely guarantee it.

Well done for realising you need to stop. Drinking 2 bottles of wine a night is not sustainable and your body will eventually become irreparably damaged. You CAN do this.

Thank you @Icecreamhelps ive stripped the bed and going to force myself in the shower.

@Muppet11 that's a positive. You might need to have a drink today to deal with withdrawal. I tapered larger can you try that?

I've had a shower and put clean bedding on. I told my DD today that I'm stopping drinking. She just looked so upset and as I have said this many times :(
I don't get abusive when I drink, I just sit in my room.
Not sure if I can taper, one drink always leads to another.....

Starting to feel slightly better, been drinking lots of water. But that's a worry as I felt so horrendous this morning the thought of drinking made me feel sick and now I'm sitting here thinking maybe I should have a few beers..... I hate this 🤯😢

No dont have any beers! Have a early night tell yourself youll have one tomorrow, and then just continue in that mindset.

Hi, I’m struggling too, but I’m a secret drinker.
@ComfortFoodCafe im doing this tonight. Join me @Muppet11

You need to find a few substitutes:
Kamboocha
Herbal teas
zero alcohol Guinness
Ginger ale
mint and lemon + sparkling water
etc

on YouTube:
Getting sober… again
This naked mind
plus check out others, until you find someone you can relate to.

Thats great!

Thank you, I have got some Tripp CBD drinks in. Will try some of your suggestions.

its quite frightening how much this has got a hold on me. I know I need to do this for so many reasons.

I can understand why AA isn’t for you. It wasn’t for my daughter either. It’s great that you’re looking for help now though and you’ve acknowledged the issue. You said the wine helps to stop your mind so I wonder if you could make a start on finding some addiction counselling? Perhaps

Maybe I will look into that, thank you

Tucked up in bed now, no alcohol today, so that's a start.

well done for taking the first step. You can do this.

Please go out and buy vitamin b supplements and double dose from tomorrow while you stop drinking. I’m not entirely sure if the mechanics of it but I read it on another thread (chat GPT info below);

Vitamin B supplements are vital when a heavy drinker stops drinking because chronic alcohol use depletes B-vitamins, especially thiamine, and deficiency can cause permanent brain damage if not corrected.

Hi @Muppet11just got home from visiting my mum. Glad you had a sober night.

Thank you!

I had a pretty rough night, lots of sweating and disturbed sleep, which I was expecting to be honest.

@Icanttakethisanymore thank you for that suggestion I have ordered some Vit B supplements, it's quite scary what alcohol can do to your body.

Waking up without a hangover is a new experience. I think I'm going to listen to some sober podcasts today. Anything to keep my mind busy. The problem with no hangover is that my mind starts focusing on everything that is wrong in my life and all the stupid mistakes I've made.

I know I just have to keep busy and try not think too deeply about that.

AA isn’t for everyone. However, part of how it works is as a process for allowing you to process that guilt and regret.

Some AA meetings are better than others, so why not try a few and see how you get on - even if it’s just to get you through that initial really tough couple of weeks one day at a time. It would be company and a distraction if nothing else. If you live near a bigger town or city there will be plenty of meetings to choose from.

Like you, I could never have just one, or if I did occasionally manage to stick to just three or four drinks, it was unpredictable, and I usually drank to oblivion. That inability to have just one (or indeed any set amount) is something people in AA really understand.

There are dogmatic people in AA but there are also plenty of kind, open-minded people who’ve been where you are. All the best.

Well done on day 1 @Muppet11 . Im on a couple of sober threads here and I'm doing sober sept. I read on here that a drug naltrexone helps to combat the addiction. Do you think you could speak to your GP? Don't stop trying. You need to beat this.

Thank you

Yes I have read about that too. I really don't want to go to my GP, I don't want that on my records.

Well done on recognising that you need to free yourself..many many people don't even get that far.
Janey Lee Grace " alcohol free life" podcasts are a great start. Non judgemental interesting information from someone who " gets it"
There's also The Sober Club which has some free content but also a members only wealth of resources, another online community is Soberistas. Sometimes just connecting with people who have successfully chosen an alcohol free life is enormously helpful. And don't be discouraged if you have false starts you are addicted to an addictive substance so every day you succeed is a cause for celebration.
I've also found the JOMO subscription useful..( joy of missing out) high quality interesting AF drinks that feel like a treat.
I've reframed my thinking with the help of quitlit and podcasts so I now look to how I can treat/ nurture myself rather than harm myself under the guise of " having fun" " relaxing" " managing stress"
I'm not going to tell you it's easy
But it's SO worth it
Good luck

You’re welcome.

I’ve recently listened to alcohol explained (William Porter) and he talks about what happens at each phase of withdrawal and why. Things will get easier. Unless you plan on drinking yourself to death you will have to do this sometime and you’ve already made a great start. You can do this.

I believe you can get a private prescription and request it doesn’t go on your record. You would need to pay for it though. From the stories I’ve read most people don’t manage to get an NHS prescription anyway so ultimately have to get it privately.

How's day 2 treating you @Muppet11?

Op have you had therapy to get to the cause of why you have been drinking so much??

It is so hard

Take it slowly

You can do this !!!!!!!!