The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Spring 2025

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the one I use, I Am Sober. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.

Warmer weather is coming. Keep an eye out for that first daffodil waving in the breeze, and make yourself at home. It's going to be alright. x

Oh @REP22 - sending all the courage and strength back to you x

Morning. Day 16 completed. Feeling slightly less anxious today, hopeful for what’s to come. Interested to meet the real Kindtomyself. I read that long term sobriety is
10% not drinking and 90% emotional, dealing with emotions that we have tried to suppress. Makes lots of sense to me.

@MagsMagnolia your post has given me a warm feeling. So glad you had a great evening.

@REP22 sorry to read about your tough time and I hope it improves very soon. Sending strength and courage

Morning beautiful shipmates sailing on the good ship Sobriety .

I will not drink today.
I will never make a twat of myself drunk again. I can do that sober.

Love and kind thoughts to all.

Morning @Kindtomyself ,hope you're feeling less anxious today, I guess part of becoming long term sober is coming to terms with our past , 90% emotions and all. I believe past shameful episodes should be delt with, but not dwelled on. Apologies to yourself as well as others if you can.
Your a different person now,a much better one.
Love and kind thoughts to you 💛.

Sending daffodils @REP22 🌼, and a treat for Sid,🍗,
Soon be spring, 🌞

Hope your joints are better today @WendyWagon,
The cottage sounds good, fingers crossed 🤞 for your house hunting.

@REP22 thinking of you and your work situation. I hope it's working out OK, seeing your tact and care on here i have a feeling it is in very capable hands.

I changed job at the end of last week. My old job often left me feeling like crap and would trigger me overworking and drinking to cope. My DH also had an abnormal liver result (not alarming but a warning) he is stopping or at least heavily cutting down. All in all, I really feel change is happening.

Viva the sober revolution! With healthier, calmer more peaceful lives x

@REP22 Thinking of you and hoping everything gets better for you. It's largely because of you and this thread that I was able to change my life. I will always be grateful. Sending you love. 🌷

It's funny, sometimes I think of you and other long term posters as having 'nailed' this not drinking lark. Your post shows that none of us, whether we have been sober for years or for days, have that security.

@MagsMagnolia, that was such a lovely post to read. I've noticed that so many people in my circle are either giving up alcohol or drastically cutting down. I really do believe there's something of a sober revolution going on.

@Kindtomyself I have read a lot about emotional sobriety too. It makes a good deal of sense. Glad you are having a better morning 😊

I’ve been dealing with finishing up a job I’ve hated for years. Today is my last day working for my horrid boss. I was practically dancing down the street when I left the office for the last time yesterday! Woop Woop! I am REALLY looking forward to my new job starting with my lovely new boss. @Womanshour my new job is something very much linked to sorting my life out so I wish you all the best with your new venture, too. @REP22 commiserations to you. Are you a rock at the office, too? Are you keeping lots of ships afloat? Be careful not to take on too much.

@WendyWagon your stalker post freaked me out. OMG, I know how I would feel if someone humiliated me like that. What a creepy, little knob.

@Kindtomyself 14 days is amazing. That’s so well done. You are getting through the hardest part. As others have said, you can’t change the past but you can make a better future. I am always guilty about the lack of time I’ve had for my kids through stress and wanting peace and quiet to drink. I know that I have the opportunity to turn that around and make the most of what I have now.

At the fundraiser last week, the AF were definitely the most popular in the room - they ran out - and it was a Friday night! Times are changing.

Good morning shipmates.

Thank you so much for your kind words and good wishes. That means so much to me. I am a bit of a rock at work @SmellyMe - it's nice to be appreciated, they call me a "star" and I got an award a couple of weeks ago. But it's very, very challenging, and I'm having to manage things that in a non-work situation I wouldn't go near in a million years. I'm sorry. Just having a bit of a self-pity party at the moment. Forgive me lads. All shall be well soon.

Here's my reason to be.

Strength and courage. We're going to make it, you and I. x

I've been following these threads for a long while.
I can't tell you how helpful they have been.
I've lived a lifetime of alcohol addiction with occasional respite.

Just wanted to put this here that I am in Day 7!
I didn't think I could ever get to this point again.

Thank you, all of you. Your struggles and successes are a real motivation.

Quite emotional today, although some of that will be the effects of the withdrawal!

Lemon cheesecake and a hefty dollop or two of double cream planned for this evening. I'll worry about the weight consequences further down the line.

Welcome @WrenNesting - I am glad you have found us. Congratulations on day 7, that's brilliant. Lemon cheesecake sounds amazing. I was a devil for chocolate milkshake when I was giving up. Definitely the lesser of two evils! x

Welcome @WrenNesting - well done on your 7 days. Amazing work 💪🏻!

Sorry to hear you’re going through a tough time at work @REP22 - hang in there, better days are coming x

Morning all.
Poorly in the night again. The DH came with tea and drugs.

Hi @WrenNesting well done on 7 days. Love a bit of lemon cheesecake, enjoy.

Hope you’re feeling better @WendyWagon. Glad there’s a shift in sobriety happening @SmellyMe. Someone was telling me today that he had quit alcohol, cigarettes and weed a year ago.

Wise words @mermadeincornwall I just need to do what you say.

Hi all,
Hugs and positive vibes to all who are struggling with loss, work, quitting booze, health…we are stronger than we think, remember that.
I feel more positive today, after a couple of weeks feeling low, I’m so grateful for that.
In bed early, sipping a nearly frozen Becks Blue, lovely, like a slushie! Two cats curled up on pillows next to me. Lovely.
Made some flapjacks earlier, realised half way through that I didn’t have enough butter, so used peanut butter as well, they were amazing, adult ds can’t leave them alone!

Mind how you go X

Hello everyone, lovely to hear everyone’s updates.

Things are really getting on top of me at the moment - work, tired all the time, family stuff. I’m so thankful I made the decision to stop drinking, it would only have made things worse.

I think I’m on Day 55. It doesn’t sound like a lot written down, but it feels like ages.

Morning. Day 17 completed. Woke at 6.15. I’m feeling more compassion to past me now. I have struggled all my life with fitting in. I’m always on the outside of any friendships and often on my own because it’s safer. I took up alcohol because it made me act more ‘fun’ until I wasn’t. Now is the time to start to explore why I feel like that. I have tried to explore this but I go around in circles.
The flapjacks sound great @Middlemarch123. Well done for day 55 @ThatWasShh hope things get easier

Morning AF shipmates.
I will not drink today.
I have so much more self respect when I am not drinking..
Love and kind thoughts to all.

Morning all.
I have always been much happier on my own @Kindtomyself - I’m not sure if that’s because I struggle with other people or am just a solitary soul at heart. But on the other hand I love “performing” and getting a reaction. Add alcohol into the mix and it’s really toxic.
I’m now much more prepared to say no to situations that are going to make me feel rubbish, and to do things that I do enjoy (even if they seem a bit odd to other people). And accept that if I have a morning of being sociable I need time to recharge.

Sorry to hear things are tough @ThatWasShh - day 55 is amazing!

Sounds like a perfect evening of contentment @Middlemarch123, unfortunately the opposite for @ThatWasShh, hope life eases up for you .

Welcome on board @WrenNesting.this is a wonderful support group, glad you found us.

@Onewildandpreciouslife yes adding alcohol into the mix is most definitely toxic yuk! ‘Peforming’ and getting a reaction strikes a chord.

@ThatWasShh and @Kindtomyself me too...
It's an odd dichotomy isn't? The introvert who craves attention. I wonder if it comes from childhood experiences?

Sorry - @Onewildandpreciouslife