The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Winter 2024

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.
All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too. Keep trying. Sobriety may not be easy - but I guarantee you that it is worth it.
I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023. I still struggle sometimes but the posters on this thread have been an absolute godsend of wisdom, support and encouragement, along with my dog - known here as Sid (not his real name), and they keep me going. I hope you find strength and comfort here too. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.
These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the one I use, I Am Sober. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.

Fire up the hot chocolate and make yourself at home.

sobersixty.com/blogs/blog/celebrating-100-days-alcohol-free-milestones-challenges-and-what-to-expect-sobersixty#:~:text=It's%20a%20milestone%20that%20deserves,have%20experienced%20along%20the%20way.

Although this is named 'sober sixty' I'm sure it applies to people of all ages!! Just happens to be especially appropriate for me as I rapidly approach that decade 😃. The Sober Sixty blog has some really interesting information which others might find useful.

Hello shipmates, hope you are having a happy Monday.

Many congratulations on the 100 days @CarrotSeeds - and what an inspirational post. You're amazing. 🏋️‍♀️🎉

So pleased for you and @Livinginaclock at 28 days. It seems unbearable at the start and such a mountain to climb. But the view from the top is beautiful. It is so worth it, every step and stumble.

With love to you all. Here's a hug from Sid to you. You're amazing. x

Bless that Sid ❤️

@bloominoreilly thanks for your post.
I'm known as an extrotvert (jazz hands me) but I can't do it all the time. I need absolute quiet. No radio,
no telly, nothing which the DH finds strange.
My DD was tested for neuro diverse issues at school but didn't meet the bar.
I can be quite anxious so the boozing covered it up. My confidence was in a bottle because it was knocked out of me as a child by a vicious sibling. I went to therapy to talk about booze and uncovered a childhood which was mainly fearful. Instead of setting boundaries, I'd bury it in wine. I don't believe I'm ND but I do do odd things and find I have big emotions. I'm easily hurt. This year is about me and how I can make better choices. After all the definition of madness is the repetition of mistakes.

Congrats @CarrotSeeds! 💯 days!! 🤩

Cheers Wendy, we are just complicated beings, aren't we - DS may have traits that suggest neurodiversity, but ultimately he just is who he is, and so am I and so are you, and we have to work with that and learn how to get by and hopefully find happiness on the whole - so here's to you and your jazz hands moments, and your quiet moments - keep going with the aim for this year, I believe you will do your absolute best x

Congratulations on 28 days @Livinginaclock and on you 100 @CarrotSeeds

Great work! 🎉

Hello.

Just popping in to say thank you to the person who used the “Never Question The Decision” quote upthread.

It appealed to me when I read that.

And tonight I used it to get myself through a momentary tricky patch.

We were eating a food which makes me want a glass of wine to go with it. I kept repeating to myself (not out loud): never question the decision, never the decision, never question the decision, until the feeling passed. And then I was fine.

So thank you!

Morning shipmates
Another AF day yesterday, this thread is helping me, especially Carrotseeds post about the benefits of being sober, I hope to write my own someday soon
Love and kind thoughts to all
Oh and I won't drink today

Morning all.
Well done @ThatWasShh and @mermadeincornwall on getting through another evening/ challenge 💪🏻

Hello Everyone

I realised I hadn't yet dropped in for a January visit! Always a busy time of year on the Alcohol Support board, and this is the best thread to choose, because it means leaving all that misery behind, forever. No more wasting energy on moderation or trying to control the uncontrollable. Nobody needs that!

Massive well done to everyone starting out - it's the most wonderful gift to give yourself, even though the first days weeks and months are a dreadful grind. I considered changing my username to Drybird2025 but it's helpful to remember how I was at the start , and keep that in mind always.

Thanks everyone and especially @REP22 for keeping this one going. 💐 - loving your pup, too! He's gorgeous.

Lots of love to you all

xxxx

Hello @Drybird2020 Of course I recognise your username from 2020 and onwards. This was one topic I hid for many years from active conversations as it was all too close to home, reminding me what I knew deep down I had to do but couldn't face. Now I check in daily and am really keen to hear how everyone is doing. It's my favourite thread 😉

Morning shipmates, hope you're doing OK.

How did it go at the dentist @WendyWagon ? Hope the tooth is alright.

Very lovely to see you @Drybird2020 we would literally be nothing without you. This thread has helped me and so many others, in many ways (not just sobriety). Thank you for starting it up. ❤️

With love to you all. Keep going - you can make it. xx

Hello all, I'm joining this thread following starting my own thread a week ago. I am 8 days AF/sober following a very bumpy end to last year. Things spiralled a little bit after barely drinking at all most of my adult life. I don't know why. It's not been totally plain sailing the past week, I've definitely had a couple of wobbles, but I'm still standing 🧍‍♀️

Welcome @StartingOverIn2025 and well done on your 8 days. Wobbles are completely normal- it’s great you’ve kept going

Good morning @StartingOverIn2025 and welcome 🥰. It's good to have you with us.

Morning wonderful sober shipmate sisters,
Another Morning here not hungover, not angry at myself, not despairing if this destructive cycle will ever end.
Tricky few days ahead for me, I will carry on reading this thread,(still catching up ) and keep you all in the forefront of my mind
Love and kind thoughts to all,and scratch behind the ear for Sid

Good morning all. Welcome @StartingOverIn2025 - I am glad you've found us, and well done on 8 days, that's brilliant. Wobbles are very common - I've had many a one myself. It's how we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves down and keep on trying that counts.

Strength and love. xx

Good evening shipmates.

Sadly I've not been AWOL I am at the pleasure of the local hospital.
However after losing my sh*t lunchtime 'lady' Wendy has a private room and accessible bathroom, hoorah. I'm on a ward that saved my life ten years ago so I'm OK. Just no food allowed yet so I've been a bit hangry. Best not to cross a six foot blonde who needs her lunch.

Goodness @WendyWagon I’m sorry to hear that. Hope you’re being looked after now, and get to eat soon. Take care x

@WendyWagon Hope you’re ok lovely lady.

Hope you’re all okay. Despite being exhausted, and living in a mess due to the ongoing bathroom renovation, I’m still sober. Bit of a white knuckle ride, but I’m hanging on. Early nights helping.
Will catch up on the last few pages.
X

Hope you are as comfortable as you can be @WendyWagon (and that you have been fed 🤣). Hospitals are never restful but a private room and own bathroom is a blessing at least! Get well soon x

Morning sober shipmates
I will not drink today
I will put my mental health first
Love and kind thoughts to all

Hope you're ok Wendywagon

Morning hope you are ok @WendyWagon