The support thread for anyone trying to lead an alcohol free life.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome. We are a bunch of people (mainly women) trying to give up alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans who can offer advice and signposting.

We don't encourage moderation purely as it can be triggering for some to read.

I'm Wendy and I'll be the captain of the ship for the next two months or so.
I gave up drinking in January 2022.

Just checking in- have been reading most days- thank you to everyone for posting , as always, it’s super helpful.

i can report that i no longer have that feeling of wanting to have a drink to block out stressful times. DC is having treatment which is going relatively well, but there are bumps in the road sometimes. Yesterday was one of them and not once did I think about a drink. I am extremely worried (am normally the queen of managing this sort of thing and keeping a lid on it) but I went to the gym and reached out to friends and just spent quiet time with the DC instead. Drinking me would have got hammered, over shared, been over emotional, slept badly and then have been wracked with anxiety on top of everything else.

Another reminder was when I gave ExH (daily lager drinker) a lift to DC’s hospital appointment he got in the car and he smelt of stale booze, he smelt sour and his breath was awful. I hope I never smelt that bad- I probably did.

I am very grateful to be on this sobriety trip- waking up today clear headed has really been priceless. I feel sad and anxious and all the things I felt yesterday, but at least I am equipped to sit with these real feelings, rather than feeling made 100x worse by booze. These feelings I can manage.

@threeandmeandthedog well done for keeping it all together 💐

I totally agree about hard times being easier without the complications of booze, @threeandmeandthedog . It must still be difficult for you just now though, and I hope things get better very soon.

Deleted -accidental repost

Good morning all. I fear I may have just reposted/inadvertently posted something written a few days ago - apologies if so. Our holiday cottage turns out to have a sporadic-at-best internet connection. Nothing for at least two days. I have missed you all. Raining hard today, so not going out until it clears a bit. Missed you all - hope you are OK.

Finally achieved a couple of bars of connectivity (perhaps the power is water-driven), so sending a quick wave before it deserts us again.

We have done lots and lots of walking. A bit sunburned, despite the utter soaking we received earlier. Resolve is still strong but, dear god, the evening cravings have been hard. It's been a hard battle not to buy something with which to "relax" of an evening after a long days walking. Almost torment. But I have listened to my own advice. Picturing the look of sad disappointment on Sid's face which would accompany the sound of a bottle opening and the scent of the contents within. I know he would still love me regardless, but the sadness in his big expressive eyes as he sees and understands what I am about to do, is a wretched memory that I do not want to repeat. Not having an internet connection to at least keep myself amused (also only terrestrial TV) - or keep the faith with you on here - hasn't helped. I've brought some books - but in the past would often have sipped at a drink whilst reading, so not terribly helpful in an isolated evening.

But I am moaning - generally we are having a lovely time and not looking forward to going home on Saturday. Might use the remainder of this rainy spell to sort the suitcase so it's done and ready. Sid is watching Homes Under the Hammer.

Here he is on a sunnier day, and receiving the rake's reward. (Actually, not sure if image adding is going to work. %£$#ing useless connection. Sorry about that.

Strength and love to you. Keep going, it will be alright soon. x

🌅 all.

Just checking in. Nothing much to report. Have listened to "Nothing good can come of this" by Kristie Coulter this week. Very good. Loved the feminism and the way she talks about the pressures women have that can continue tomorrow maladaptive drinking habits.

Sorry to hear about your worries and stressed @threeandmeandthedog . Totally agree that stressful situations are much easier to control without the added issues of hangover, anxiety and mortification.

@WendyWagon good luck with the farmhouse viewing today. I would love to move but realistically can't afford anything like the space we currently have in town so are stuck in the back and beyond for the foreseeable.

Here we go. Sid sends his love - but he won't be sharing "his" ice-cream. It was actually mine - but he won't waste a chance to swipe the majority whilst in the attempt to get a decent picture. He's no fool - he knows how to sabotage an opportunity to reap maximum reward, the little monkey.

Hi there, bit late in in the thread but please can I join you? I'm 47 and have stopped drinking about a month ago now.

I'm quite liking the Trip CBD drinks to relax in the evening, they are about £2 from the local shop so not too expensive now.

Best wishes to everyone doing this. My wake up call was finding out I have a gene linked to increased risk of Alzheimer's which is also meant to be linked to higher risk when drinking. I also had a CT head scan which showed mild brain atrophy and might need more tests / scans, but my memory results were Ok (not great but not too bad) This concerned me and I am trying to e.g. exercise as well.

Welcome @Orangesandlemons77 👋🏻

Well done on 1 month. 🎉

Hi @Orangesandlemons77 good to have you on board. @REP22 i love the idea of you and Sid sharing the ice cream 😂. I used to have a (very greedy) Labrador who made it her mission to share pretty much any food I had. Miss her.
@WendyWagon hope the viewing goes well. We're trying to sell at the moment. Need to move for schools unfortunately.
I'm sat by the pool in Turkey DH and kids are on an inflatable shoving each other in ATM. Very pleased to report they have AF beer, AF gin and ALL the cocktails I've been interested in have been able to be adapted to AF versions. I actually wonder if Turkey being a Muslim country has maybe helped with that a bit? Anyway it's been brilliant so far (but only got to the AI resort yesterday!) and I DO feel like I'm getting my money's worth with the mocktails and beers (and patisserie and fancy chocolatier!) which was one of the things I was worried might break me.
Keep on keeping on everyone 😘

Oh and DH has been drinking his usual Pina coladas but has asked to have the last couple AF. Says he doesn't like drinking in the heat. He's never worried about that before. I think he's drinking a bit more "consciously" these days. I'm sure it's because when I used to drink it was sort of mindless really. I was always the one with the problem and he always really seemed to be able to take or leave it. With me not joining him (or leading the charge) he doesn't seem particularly interested in drinking either for the most part.
When we arrived at check in yesterday they handed us both a glass of champagne and he immediately said "my wife doesn't drink alcohol. Could we get sparkling waters instead please" 🥰Was looking to see if the kids noticed. Obviously they didn't 😂

Morning all.
Up and kicking at the bridge.
@Orangesandlemons77 welcome and well done. The first month can be the hardest.

I loved the farmhouse but I don't know if the location would work. It's a busier side of the town. I only moved last spring but couldn't buy anything that I really liked. This house can accommodate everything I own and has little work to do bar a bathroom and the garden. The DH joined me on the viewing. He loved it which is unusual for a centuries old house.
We do need more parking and I have always wanted chickens.
I'm storing all my antiques from our last farm house.

Friday is always a challenge for me. Eyes down and strength.

Morning. Also up and ready to face the day
happy Friday all

Morning all.

Off for a tasting menu with DM for lunch today. Hope they have good AF options available.

I slept very badly last night, and got up early as the cleaner comes on Friday mornings. I really had to drag myself downstairs, then got a text to say she'll be late. My broadband is still not sorted, and I have a work deadline that I have to meet today, so I'm not a happy bunny this morning 🥳

Morning all, and strokes to Sid.

Hello shipmates, greetings from the Wild West Country. At the top of the Moor so have some signal! Managed to successfully resist cravings (wretched) and keep the faith. We've just finished our last walk of this holiday (5 miles - wet and much gorse and bracken, not Sid's favourite). Side has been a good boy and was allowed a bit of ice cream for a treat (actually a distraction while I pulled a grass seed off his crispy sunburnt ear. Success!). But now we're off to the next car park to get another ice cream for me (don't tell him).

I hope you're doing OK, and loins girded for the weekend.

Here is Sidney posing especially for you by a little moorland pool a couple of hours ago.

Strength and love to you. Keep going. It might be tough but it WILL be worth it. Honestly. xx

Ahoy from the bridge.
I had to have the strength of Samson last night. I had huge cravings for the wine bottle. In the end I munched the hell out of a valancia orange lolly from Aldi. .
Then last night I had a drinking dream involving a gin and orange cocktail. I was with capt Jack Sparrow! 😄
Lord the things our brain does.

I was pressing togs yesterday for ebay. Gosh the response was poor. Usually people fight over the brand I put up for sale. Perhaps they are all on vinted.

A bit of shopping later and a curry to make. Love to all. X

Well done for fighting it off @WendyWagon
I ordered a 0% gin and tonic at the bar last night. Have had them before and they're good. The bar lady didn't speak good English and brought me a rum and coke zero. It was dark and I didn't realise until I took a gulp. Feck me that was a hard one. I had to fight with myself against the "I didn't order it. It won't count because it's a mistake" I did return it though. And I'm not counting the gulp as a slip. Because it WASN'T my fault.

Hi all. Just a quick check in. Great Michelin ⭐ meal with DM yesterday. Excellent (really top tier) AF pairing with the food. Most made in-house. I was particularly impressed with a lemon balm and rapeseed emulsion concocted to accompany the monkfish. 😋😋😋

Busy day of house cleaning before heading out for a pub meal with DFIL and DStepMIL.

Greetings shipmates! Sid and I are back in the land of functional Internet!

We have missed you, but thought of you often. And kept your wise words uppermost in my mind when the cravings were cruel. Here at last is the picture of himself that Sid posed for especially for you. The holiday would not have been possible while drinking. And that would have been a real pity. We had some lovely walks.

Strength and love to you xx ❤️

Sid has a lovely smile 💕.

Congratulations to all who have fought off cravings. It's not easy, is it? Worth it the next day, though.

Well done those fighting off the cravings
that wine witch really is a bitch

Definitely @ShyMaryEllen - the Vodka Voldemort was whispering at me whilst I was on the A303 today. Not worth feeling like sh€te in the morning for though. Have planned to collect neighbour from garden centre tomorrow morning. Having a plan for the morning is helpful. Also had a lovely chat with several neighbours in my street when we got back home (Sid is a popular fellow). Again, not possible when drinking. Most of the day during weekends is taken up sleeping off the night before and its effects. xx

Morning all another early start here. Still on holiday and the wine from the welcome pack is still untouched.
happy Sunday all

Morning all.
Im away at the moment too - in the UK and we’re having glorious sunny weather. (Hoping I don’t jinx it now!).
Well done on resisting the welcome wine @Sortingmyselfoutdayatatime .

We let out a holiday home, and when we were getting it set up with the holiday let people, they said they don’t put wine in the welcome pack, because they don’t know if their guests have a problem with alcohol. I was still drinking at the time, and thought what a strange idea that was! Now I see how sensible and kind it was.