The support thread for anyone trying to lead an alcohol free life.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome. We are a bunch of people (mainly women) trying to give up alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness
The original thread was started by @drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans who can offer advice and signposting.

We don't encourage moderation purely as it can be triggering for some to read.

I'm Wendy and I'll be the captain of the ship for the next two months or so.
I gave up drinking in January 2022.

In what way has your liver been affected, @WendyWagon? Some markers are more sensitive than others, so easier to bring down as well as quicker to rise.

It must be really irritating, but if you had still been drinking the levels of whatever it is would be even higher, so there's that, I suppose.

Hi I don't post much but am always lurking and reading every post.
Wanted to share a little proud moment today - went out to sit in the sunshine after work with colleagues who were all drinking . I remained AF (day 74 now) . Gave people a lift home - what a load of crap they were speaking !
Got home , drank tea and had a long bath . No stupid behaviour, no dreadful sleep coming up, no acid reflux , no wine witch anxiety tomorrow - what a great feeling !!

Well done! And tomorrow when you wake up with no Fear, it will be even better.

Absolutely brilliant @CelieandNettie , that's fantastic and a brave achievement to be proud of- your 74 days (🏆) and for totally rocking your sober afternoon when temptation must've been high. Top stuff. Enjoy a restful sleep and your fresh sober Saturday! 😀 xx

I managed to successfully cook some of my fish for tea. Teriyaki salmon. I impressed even myself. The dog enjoyed the trimmings. Now he is rewarding me by farting directly and frequently into my right ear. I can feel the noxious little gusts across my cheek. For I have again successfully made it to bed and resisted the pull of the late-nite offie. This I rejoice in. The dog's bottom; not so much... oh lord, there goes another one. Accompanied by a sleepy little grunt of satisfaction from the other end. Little git. There is no justice in this. 😶‍🌫️

Good night all. Keep going, you're strong and you can do it. xx

@CelieandNettie that's amazing well done you! X

Amazing @CelieandNettie

Congrats on your salmon and sober Friday @REP22

We've got an epic 9hour drive from Belgium to Roscoff ahead of us today. Which means I will have to share some of the journey as driver.

I am very nervous driving in Europe but it should be ok as most is on the motorway.

Ahoy,
Up a bit later due to a sleeping dog.

@CelieandNettie well done.

@ShyMaryEllen something is too high on the scale. They will confer apparently. I am with the consultant at the end of the month. I have been taking over the counter sleeping pills. It might contraindicate.

The DS has gone to the big car event. Just me and the DD today. I will be sorting stuff in the house.
The pretty cottage sold but tbh I didn't want to live in that location.
I am feeling anxious already about a friend coming to lunch on Wednesday. She invited herself. She can be bloody rude.

Oh god how annoying about your rude friend @WendyWagon. It's a bit devious but I might find my excuses now and cancel. You shouldn't have to feel anxious about a self-invited rude guest for days in the run up!

Good luck with the drive @EastCoastDamsel , you will be alright. Do they have Movenpicks, or whatever their motorway services are called, so you can break up the journey a bit? Have a safe trip. ❤️. I once had a memorable layby stop in Germany. No loos, so ducked behind a bush for the brief necessary. Then had to remain crouching and hidden for AGES as two very fat and very elderly German men had waddled up and were pissing on the other side of the bush behind which I was concealed. It was like Niagra f##king Falls, the jets went on for ages (Viagra Falls, perhaps...? 🤔). When die altern herren had finally zipped-up and gone, I emerged cramped and ashen-faced to find my dad and brother lying across the bonnet of the car, crying with helpless laughter. Vielen dank chaps. 🙄🫡

@WendyWagon bad luck about the cottage - there's a better one out there somewhere else for you. Sorry about your "friend", I hate people who invite themselves, there's usually good reason why the open invites aren't forthcoming. How easy is it for you to get out of the house for a bit? My strategy is to set an alarm on my phone. When it goes off, pretend it's a call or text - affect stunned silence, then "oh my God.... I'm so sorry, I'm going to have to deal with this. We're going to have to cut it short today, I'm ever so sorry." Usher CF out and head off to Sainsbury's/other establishment and camp out for half an hour with a coffee before heading back. You don't need to make up a story (it's too personal and upsetting)*. And when you move to your new dream cottage don't tell them the address. Good luck with it. x

*BUT- if you want an all-purpose, get-out-of-jail-free excuse for annoying friend/family engagements --- tell them you've got to take your friend REP22 to an emergency vet's appointment. Her dog needs to have a cork surgically removed from his bottom following a night of unacceptable flatus. 🌬

Strength and love to all. xx

Am away and meeting boozy friends. This will be a test

Good luck @Sortingmyselfoutdayatatime we're with you ❤️ you can make it xx

Evening all.
I am feeling better about the whole job thing. I actually feel free.
I am on the blue top milk. Cheers!

We don't go out much in the summer. I think it's a hangover from the DC sporting events. They were quite boozy.

I mentioned in my SM post I was stepping down from my role and they all think I am ill. I would have loved to say I can't work with another set of crackpots but you can't can you? I've got a share option handshake but I'm done.
In days of old I would have slurred something rude by now and got myself in trouble.
More sorting to do.

@Sortingmyselfoutdayatatime
Good luck tonight.

The luck of the Irish from this Irishwoman! 🍀

Evening Captain @WendyWagon - glad you're feeling more buoyant about your ex-job. I know what you mean about telling some home truths on the way out. Mine in this case would be: "Yes. Yes I AM sick. Sick of you, you pernicious soul-sucking kn#b-jockeys. I hope all your children are born with very tiny d#cks. And that INCLUDES the girls!"

But it's ill-advised and really serves no good. Be free with head held high and without a backwards glance and dignity intact. Freedom welcomes you. There's lots of good stuff still to come. 😀 xx

evening ladies. scuse my absence having been busy finishing work post new government ( civil servant) and getting me DP and two DDs one with possible covid on holiday. yikes. thought she had a cold but she's been dreadful since we arrived. good job we're in a villa and not smittling a hotel full of other people.

but i am still sober coming up to 90 ish days or 110 ish days minus the drunken wedding on day 21. sober holiday has been alright so far!! first one EVER. loving the clear headed mornings and really feel brain operating on an even keel with so much less anxiety.

good to see everyone's news and progress - too many posts to acknowledge but keep on keeping on you total dudettes

Thanks all. Made it and had a nice time. X

Morning all. Day 43 (1,005 hours according to my app 🎉🎉) AF

Discovered last night that I am very possibly allergic to oysters. (Which is very depressing as they are like my favourite thing).

I have had a few bad reactions after oysters in the past few years, but I have always put that down to the booze I was consuming alongside them.

The MOST embarrassing incident was a Sunday morning on the tube at Kensington High Street when I just had to get off the train immediately and puked all over the platform. 😳😳😳

Anyway, we were having a lovely meal at a great little place just outside Roscoff overlooking the sea (absolutely idyllic) and I ordered 6 Brittany oysters to start. I had a moment of hesitation as I recalled the above incident but then brushed it aside and thought "yeah, but I was drinking alongside the oysters and isn't it known that they can cause an reaction with booze sometimes"

They were absolutely gorgeous, tasted just like the sea and very salty compared to English ones.

Anyway before the meal ended, I was red in the face and chest and itchy all over (just like the initial reaction I have had in the past) and am now lying in bed feeling bloated and queasy.

This is a real disappointment 😥

Anyway, think I will order one of those home blood test panels to check for food allergies when we get home from Cornwall next week.

Sorry you're not feeling well @EastCoastDamsel I'm allergic to cats which is major bummer because I love cats BUT we have 2. I ended up researching hypoallergenic breeds and I'm still a little bit allergic but it's manageable.
I hate oysters though. I won't say what they remind me of (unless it turns out you are allergic after your blood panel - then maybe it will put you off and make you feel better about not having them!)
I woke up in a major panic today. Ful on sweaty anxiety like the type after a big night out. I'm not sure why. My mind immediately went back to the night before, looking for the drinking but there was none. How strange. It has died down now at least
I'm feeling nervous about going away next week. Scared I'm going to find the temptation of an all inclusive resort too much. I wonder if it's related? I need a plan I think.

@EastCoastDamsel hope you're feeling a bit better. oysters are big favourite of mine too so i feel your pain. middle class problem but i would struggle to eat them without the obligatory few glasses of fizz. like @WendyWagon i WAS a big fan of champagne.

@Itsrainingten i'm not at an all inclusive but i am on hols in a lovely villa in a balearic resort on day 3 and am sober. probs not as hard as all inclusive. i'm finding im not craving booze as much as would normally on hols as am not hungover everyday so not seeking relief. so in that sense it's a virtuous circle. there are really nice alcohol free beer options here too. if there's none at the hotel could you go to a supermarket and find some? they may do mocktails - if not, ask? i am finding that an ice cold AF beer at 6 or 7 takes the crave away and distracts me.

i'm loving the early morning clear head and reminding myself i would normally be hungover and grumpy with the kids. that's a win. i look better too - no blotchy bloated holiday face - and mainly i am not giving up 100 odd days of sobriety for some sodding booze on hols which mean ill be back to square one when i go home with double the post holiday blues.

you can do this!

@REP22 the first thing i did catching up with this thread was look for the pics of your glorious dog who has become my sober mascot. 💜

@WendyWagon sorry to hear of your liver issues. @ShyMaryEllen is a generous advisor on these things as we know.

my right hand side pain has subsided since i stopped drinking in april. it was one of my main motivators ( i know your liver issues are meds related and not the same @WendyWagon i do hope you're ok).

i have taken @ShyMaryEllen advice and am waiting a while in recovery whilst trying to build the courage for liver tests which i must do. DD2 has a major op in september tho so i may wait a bit longer than the three months.

@Sortingmyselfoutdayatatime well done on getting through a boozy testing situation these things make us so much stronger in our sober journeys

@BigFatSober noting your name change and your irishness as the partner of a wonderful irishman i am drawn to the irish - a clever bunch.

@Womanshour hope family weekend going ok and good news on your husbands drinkinking reduction.

i'm finding cravings can come from bloody nowhere ! but i have strategies now. sometimes i just watch the craving like sushi going by at one of those conveyor belt restaurants. eg yup - there's a craving, but i don't have to act on it... just watching it ... and now it's gone ...

@cookiebee welcome and well done. great post on stereotypical problem drinkers. and snobbery around problem drinker and perception of what they ' should be'. all a load of dangerous bollocks innit?

@NextPhaseOfLife you ok?

@CelieandNettie welcome and well done.