The continuing support thread for living alcohol free, every day. Everyone welcome.

[Blackberryblossom]

Hello, and welcome to the alcohol-free support thread. The original thread was started about three years ago by drybird.

We’re a broad community who have all chosen to live alcohol free for good. Whatever your reasons, whatever you’re going through, someone here will have been there too. People here will have done that first sober holiday, first sober Christmas/birthday/work do/wedding/funeral, first AF night out with the drinking friends, first (and 2nd and 3rd…) AF Friday night/Sunday lunch, first day 31/day 101, first lapse. Don’t be shy about posting, we love all the successes of whatever shape and size and we have all been there too when things go wrong.

If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quit altogether then maybe have a look at the long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board? Lots of support there too.

Brew yourself a and come on in!

Wow, that's amazing, @Onewildandpreciouslife! I'm in awe.

I decided to have wine on Saturday. (Controversial, I agree) It was a considered decision, and with particular parameters. As it happens, it turned out to be quite a Big Deal in a positive way - which I did not expect to be the outcome.

At the start I was offered a glass of a pretty cheap wine. I had a sip and it was revolting. This was a wine I used to quite happily drink. The sharp acidic kick of the alcohol in it really put me off and I gave it away.

I had some pretty expensive stuff next. That was quite nice, up to a point, but I couldn't believe how much my taste has altered in two months. I didn't love it, and I definitely didn't like the slight alcohol buzz it gave me.

Then a glass of red with some cheese. The red definitely went wonderfully with the cheese, but I again didn't like the buzz or the tang of alcohol of he wine itself. The cheese was far and away the best part of that combination. I turned down further wine because I just didn't want it.

On the whole, I rather shocked myself to discover that, actually, wine is something I am glad I walked away from.

I missed the memory of enjoying it, but not the actual stuff itself, and I far prefer the sensation of being clear headed for the evening to feeling blurred.

My mindset has completely changed as a result - I'm not depriving myself of something I want anymore! I just don't want it. This isn't a penance or a hardship. I am happy with zero alcohol Guinness or gingerbeer or tonic water. They taste nice and they don't mess with my wellbeing.

Wine doesn't have me in its thrall. I feel so much more free. A life without alcohol is actually more enjoyable.

It's like waving goodbye to that asshole teenage boyfriend you knew in your heart you were too good for, however cool he looked in a biker jacket.

@HappyAsAGrig that is such a good analogy! Asshole boyfriend who's not doing you any favours...

Day 5 today and it's challenging. First day back in the monotony of school runs, housework, kids after school clubs, dinners etc - it's around now I normally nip out for wine when I've promised myself not to have any because it's Monday!

I've actually had a really productive house organisation day today but struggling now.

I've got work tomorrow so going to stay strong! I've asked darling other half to pick me up some ginger beer on the way home from work and I'm off to make dinner and stick the radio on...

I've got some plans to do for work tomorrow so will keep a clear head and get on with that when the kids go to bed... maybe another bath and some lotions and potions to make myself feel nice and keep my hands busy 😂

We will need a new thread soon folks. I won't volunteer again this time due to my poorly health.

Not good today.

Busy on here this weekend! Well done everyone. I also love the crap boyfriend analogy!
Congratulations on the amazing marathon time @Onewildandpreciouslife , what an achievement! I know there’s probably a technical term for recovering after a marathon, I hope it’s going well anyway.
@Fortheloveofgodwhy I’m sorry about the third round of covid, just in time for Easter. Was the shirt potato check today or is it next week? Either way I hope it goes well.
@REP22 I’d be submitting an invoice for prime advertising space. Blimming cheeky!
@WendyWagon how lovely about your friend. You’ll have an AF sidekick!
We had a lovely weekend celebrating dh’s birthday. I don’t miss drinking at all, but I do wish there were better af options available in restaurants. One place we went to hasn’t changed their selection of (4) AF cocktails in 3 years.

We’re getting towards the end of this thread - I can never remember if we get 39 pages or 40. Is there anyone able to take a turn hosting the new thread? It doesn’t take much time and there’s lots of support. Thank you.

I've not been about as much as usual (and yes this thread has been lovely and busy the past few weeks, I'll have to dedicate some proper time for catching up)

Happy to host the next thread but also happy if anyone else wants to have a go!!

We've got space for about 45 more posts before we're full.

hello everyone day 10 here back to work and feeling really stressed already! also trying to set up a new phone which has kicked me out of all my banking apps and of course i can't remember any of the memorable words! wine witch is definitely hovering to see how i cope with this one!

You've got this @ponzusoup . Wine wouldn't help. And 10 days is a great achievement, some of the hardest days are already behind you.

Chin up, @ponzusoup . @Blackberryblossom is right. Wine won't help. You'll just go back to square 1, and have to go through it all again. Give it another 10 days, and see how you feel?

Are you on your own tonight? You could have an early night if so - being away from the kitchen, or wherever you kept the wine can help. I don't know if it was just me, but I found that eating a bowl of cereal made the thought of wine less appealing - probably the milk. I also got in pots of rice pudding, for the same reason. Can you tell yourself that if you were a drinker you might pour yourself a glass, but as you aren't you will have [whatever] instead? The more often you do that, the more you reinforce the fact that you are now teetotal.

@Blackberryblossom it as today and just a normal collection (I thought there was one!) of lumps caused by a veritable chocolate box style selection of causes. But non of them Cancerous - so that’s a win. No one asked me to fill in how much i drank, which is always a shame. A missed opportunity to say nil, nada, zilch, zero, 🤣

thank you have survived. have accessed main banking apps but may have lost my whatsapp history. but f that. have made my peace with it and stepped away from the phone. am making nice cup of tea.

@Fortheloveofgodwhy thank goodness. and also sod them for not giving you a zero drink logging opportunity !

Another minor milestone - went out to celebrate our son's graduation. Cocktails were involved for those who wanted them, but I was happy with my blood orange fizzy pop.

Great news,@Fortheloveofgodwhy ! And congratulations on 10 days, @ponzusoup

Morning all.
Up drinking a second tea. Nothing like a Yorkshire tea.
Starting out feeling better today.
I had been sick yesterday which is a side effect of my treatment but a bit late to get it. I am getting downstairs better so I'm taking that as a win. From not wanting to go on (sorry lads, I didn't say because we all have our ups and downs) to walking like a weeble, I'll take a weeble wobble.
I heard yesterday my old boss had an absolutely disgusting name for me. Vulgar and fattest. I wish people would think before they 'have to tell you'. I fancied sending the boys round! He was a person of questionable parentage anyway. In days gone by I would have gone on the booze and sent him a get stuffed letter. I finished my Marion Keyes instead.
Have a great day all, we have sunshine on the downs.

Wow I wasn't on the thread all weekend and have tons to catch up on. A challenging weekend - had some friends for dinner, family round - but I am happy to be sober.

@Crunchymum I'd also be up for hosting the new thread. i haven't done it before and it would help keep me on the straight and narrow. but you have first dibs and i'm equally happy not to. Let me know what you think.

Congrats @Onewildandpreciouslife on your amazing marathon time!

Please go ahead @livingalivelife

I'm not here all that much at the moment anyway.

I can be the backup plan 😁

Morning all, well done @ponzusoup for keeping going and staying strong. I know what that must have cost you in terms of effort and willpower. And @HappyAsAGrig - I think that's a big milestone, brilliant. xx

@Fortheloveofgodwhy although no lump is especially good, I am so glad that none of them is the Big C. Hopefully the treatment will be smooth and reassuring. The antibiotics are working their magic on mine, hopefully will be gone altogether by my follow-up appointment next week...!

@WendyWagon I like Yorkshire Tea! Yorkshire Gold if we're on holiday, hehe. What an utter kn-bjockey your former boss is. And WHY do people need to tell us these things?! Muppets. Keep going Wendy, you are Boadicea in your strength and perseverance, you are so encouraging and helpful to us all.

Slimming World for me tonight. I fear the scales (too many leftover hot cross buns) but shall persevere. We had hail and high winds over the last couple of days; one of the political signs erected in my garden was broken and downed yesterday morning. When I got home from work last night, someone has been in my garden (again) to repair/replace it. I live in a tucked-away little cul-de-sac with no through traffic (although on one side there is a popular right of way, so the side sign is very visible) - so a casual passer-by would not see that the sign out the front was broken. I therefore suspect neighbour involvement. Oh billy-b-ll-cks. 😠

I was thinking about going to a general meeting about getting involved in worthy community works tomorrow. It's in the pub, but my prime suspect will be there. I only ever drank alone at home, so temptation will not be an issue, but 'twill be interesting if anything about the signs is said... Unfortunately I am no Helen Mirren... But the dog's nose for detecting a miscreant is unerring, and he wasn't happy that someone's been diddling in his borders... Hmmm...

Strength and love to all. x

OK @Crunchymum and @Blackberryblossom - I'll set up a new thread.

Hello everyone

Here's the link for the new thread when this one's full. See you over there!

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/alcohol_support/5051277-new-april-continuing-thread-for-living-an-alcohol-free-life-all-welcome