The Freedom Thread (continued) - A thread for people wanting to enjoy an alcohol free life. Everyone welcome!

[BunniesBunniesBunnies]

This is a thread for people who want to live an alcohol free life! These threads were started about three years ago by @DryBird2020 and they have been a continued source of support for people at all stages of sobriety. Whether you are one day, one month or one year sober - You are welcome! The only thing we ask if that you have committed to stopping drinking when you join the thread (as talk to drinking or moderation may be triggering to some of our posters).

My name is @Bunnies and I am almost 1000 days sober, in no small part thanks to this amazing supportive community. I hope to see many new and old posters on this thread!

Happy sober 2023 all!

Morning all. New job today.
Will report back later.

Morning

@Kindtomyself good to hear from you - it can be painful to sit and look at emotions head on especially if they have been blunted by alcohol before. Is there anything in your ‘toolbox’ that would help? Consider whether giving an issue a set time would help, as in putting aside an hour to focus intently on it would give you any perspective. It might be that you just need to be patient with yourself which is tricky when life is pulling you to get things done. Be gentle in how you think about yourself- your name is one to be lived by.

Good luck @WendyWagon. @Onewildandpreciouslife sorry to hear that you are struggling with DH moods, me too (my DH not yours). He's such a miserable git sometimes, he shouted at me yesterday because he suggested I did the food shop (he usually does it but it doesn't happen weekly and yes we could do it online but that's another story) and I said 'the problem with me doing the food shop means that all the other jobs in the house that need doing won't get done'. Cue shouting from DH 'don't go then' 'I should be able to relax on a Sunday'. Blah blah. I feel murderous when he does this. He then acts as if everything is fine later and I just carry round more negative emotions.
Sorry for going on I just needed to get that off my chest

@AlloftheTime thanks for taking the time to post, you are so right.
I have stopped meditating and journaling and so getting back into it today. I woke at 4 and decided to just sit and explore how I was feeling , it really helped and I definitely feel a bit better today as though something has unblocked if that makes any sense! How's everything going with you?

@Kindtomyself makes perfect sense! So easy to let self care (my definition includes meditating and journaling) slip when busy with ‘life’. I’m glad you’ve had some clarity and yes I do understand the blocked feeling. For me it often happens when I am overwhelmed but not necessarily when I am most busy. Have a good Monday.

Hello one and all, Happy Monday (if there is such a thing)

I haven't been able to post as MNHQ still haven't fixed an issue I reported on the app about 6 weeks ago (curser randomly jumping into middle of the text / insanely large paragraphs / the back button deletes most of what you type it is impossible to post more than a sentence on the app for me! Seems to be limited to a certain version on a certain android but it's annoying as feck)

Anyway I have fired up the laptop so I am back.

Hope everyone is well? It's a long, dark, dismal month isn't it? I have 2 birthday's this week (DC2 and DC3 and they aren't twins, not great planning there lol) so I have had to really force myself to get into the spirit of things. January birthday's are so depressing.

I am feeling pretty neutral at the moment, not been to the bunny field for a while but I am plodding along. Slow and steady, no drama but it's all just a bit monotonous and boring. My mind used to trick me into thinking that drinking relieves monotony but it never did, it just created a different (more expensive, anxious, monotony full of shame and self loathing) so I am being mindful of this.

I am still struggling with my eating habits. In fact it all feels very reminiscent of my struggles with the booze? The constant dialogue, the constant bargaining, the constant internal struggle. BUT at least I am not doing it with booze! 11 months (and 3 days....) since I last drank and life is better.

Oh @Crunchymum sorry it’s all seeming a bit flat and dismal. We are half way through January though so keep looking forward and once you’ve navigated (I won’t say enjoyed!!) the two birthdays February will be in sight. Your one year anniversary won’t be long either so a big achievement on the horizon. I know you realise it yourself but January would look worse with a hangover wouldn’t it? Got something to relieve the boredom bit? Or perhaps plan a treat for the 12 month mark?
Not sure where you are but it’s stopped raining here so I’m hanging on to that to cheer my day 😊

Hello again, I hope everyone is doing well. I said I wasn’t going to post until I felt a bit more confident in my willpower.

I’m still not drinking. I don’t currently feel much better because I have a virus, but I’m sure I will!

I think I may have lost a few pounds, which is very welcome as I have joint issues and extra weight doesn’t help at all (alcohol is also very inflammatory!).

So all is good here ☺️.

Hope the day went well Sav and that it was good to get back in the saddle 😊

@MissingMoominMamma good to hear from you again - well done on staying AF and hope the virus clears up soon.

Hope you get rid of the virus soon moomin!
How was your work day @WendyWagon all sounds very interesting!
January is a bit dismal isn’t it crunchy? The ‘meh’ is exacerbated by constant rain & all our local roads being bloody closed due to flooding. One poor street has had a sewer collapse and raw sewage enter their homes. No one is grumbling too much about that road closure. Poor things! I was going to go to a car dealership today to see about trading mine in for a smaller run around. Now that 2 older teen DDs are driving I need something we can all drive (can get insurance for!) But unfortunately couldn’t get there due to all 3 roads being closed. But at least I’ve not got poo coming through the door!
Maybe we need to think of some treats we can have or do to brighten our moods?

just had a brew - I love waking up and being to think clearly, can’t believe I managed to function for so long with a clogged up brain every morning!
@StayingVigilant roads here are now mostly open after but ice is now the problem. How awful for anyone affected by that sewer collapse.

have a good day all - stay warm.

Morning all.
Good to hear from you @MissingMoominMamma
sorry to hear you’re feeling flat @Crunchymum, but congratulations on your 11 months! I’ve decided that January is over halfway now, so we’re on the home straight.
I love how much pleasure I get from simple things now @AlloftheTime - that first coffee of the morning, and turning out the light at bedtime sober.
Hope yesterday was ok @WendyWagon
Very cold and frosty here this morning- have decided it’s too icy to run. Might go later when I’m less likely to fall over

Morning all I am sorry I can't keep up with every message but it's good to see that people are doing so well and I am certainly getting some good ideas.
I am starting to have a sneaky thought that as I've been 2 weeks sober I am " cured" but I know from several previous experiences that sadly it's not the case.
Someone upthread said that they have stopped journalling and I realised that despite my best intentions I never started.
What I'm doing is carrying on doing the same things I've always done but without a glass of wine so I am in danger of falling down when I get overwhelmingly bored/ sad/ stressed.
I need to prioritise new healthy habits.
Apart from that I am doing ok, don't feel markedly different physically but dare I say it the anxiety is fading....
Keep on keeping on

sunshine
I know I cant moderate and (other than when the wine witch calls me) I don't want to. I know I can't have the life of wellness I want if I drink.

Good morning my lovelies.
Nightmare journey home from new job yesterday, 4 hours. M40 closed.
I had talked non stop.
Husband had had a piece of cake, poor sod. I shoved in two 'finest' lasagnes which makes me think of the Victoria Wood joke of an 'individual fruit pie' for old people.
Millitant DD hadn't made any tea as she was still sulking over uni accommodation. (I know a couple of you helped when I put a 'help' up on mumsnet, thank you) I name changed for that because of the circumstances. Didn't want people searching me and thinking I was a booze addled moaner!
Hopefully we get a compromise today. New job is part time which suits me right now. The other brand I will part own. Just waiting for the ink to dry.
I had a good luck gift of mini pop left for me yesterday. It is still in the fridge! Bloody miracle with the stress of DD and journey home. I just went to bed. The joys of being 57 (that's late 50s isn't it? ) 😀
Have a peaceful day all.

Great to hear you sounding so positive @WendyWagon . I’ve decided my mid 50s is my time!

@Sunshineesther dont worry about keeping up - just post when you want to. Keep going! It’s so cruel that as we start to feel better because we’ve stopped drinking, our brain tells us we can drink again.

Morning all (just)

A very quick check in as it’s too cold to sit still for long and the dog is yet to be walked. Loving the frosty grass but less so the chilled bones. Tea is definitely my friend today. Glad everyone is muddling on, I’m cherishing my 14 mins of extra light!

I know what you mean about boredom and stress. I'm trying to think of it as an opportunity to actually deal with some of the negative things of life rater than just hitting the bottle and deadening them. That's the plan anyway although I am not much looking forward to having to put it into action.

Hi all
Just checking in with a daylight check, especially for all those feeling the heaviness of winter.

By this time next week we will have an extra 18 minutes of light. It's coming. Spring is coming.

It's beautiful here (rural Scotland). Snow still lying from yesterday but the most gorgeous blue skies and sunshine and that wonderful crisp and fresh light that you only get at this time of year. And the stars at night are a sight not to be missed so look up!

Take it easy folks, don't over do things at this time of year, keep it simple. Fresh, healthy food, lots of water and then treats to help you through the cravings for alcohol if you are having them.
Exercise or movement of some kind, even if it's a short walk, a 10 minute yoga practice or chuck on a favourite song and dance your wee heart out. I've been enjoying my exercise bike on rainy days.
And when it's dry get outside if even for 5 minutes. If you have a garden go stand in it, walk round in it (mine is tiny but it's just nice to be outside) and see what's happening, in the earth, in the sky.
Reading books (for fun not necessarily work related books or quit lit - just stories), early nights, baths, crafts, favourite films, meditations, guided or not. Anything that nourishes you.

And don't forget to rest! You can do this! Its an amazing gift you are giving yourself. The field of bunnies is real and it's open to everyone!

Sliding in with a quick heya, great news on the job @WendyWagon glad day one went ok. Hope the daughters uni accomodation gets sorted too.
Love the sentiment about the garden @Breathmiller i would be lost without my morning dog walks.
I am at 345 days sober, and I am heading into the sugar detox zone finally - so many of the same themes around that. I can't blame the alcohol withdrawal/replacement, the reality is my sugar addiction was probably the reason i didn't drink MORE when i was drinking. Anything to fill that void... I need to remind myself self harm through poisonous substances is not the way to feel better. It won't cherish the lost and lonely inner child. Treating my body with respect and nourishing it is a much better path. I am purposefully leaving it to the end of Jan like i did the quitting drinking, so i am not on that new year bandwagon which so often derails come feb.
I have also booked another summer school course which was my 'treat' last summer for 6 months of abstinence...

@Fortheloveofgodwhy
'the lost and lonely inner child' I bet there are a lot of those among us.
My therapist very quickly worked out my drinking stemmed from my childhood. Hopefully the light came in and it is out in the open.

Thank you for the daylight tracker @Breathmiller ! I saw daffodil shoots this morning when I was walking the dog - spring is definitely on its way!

Just checking in super quickly, not caught up on the thread fully but my eyes fell on @Breathmiller’s latest post which I really, really needed to read. So thanks for that.
and a new job for @WendyWagon!!! How excellent!
@Fortheloveofgodwhy you’re nearly at a year! Wow!

I'm about to commence my sugar detox too and I've commented upthread how similar my mindset is with sugar and booze. I'm 337 days so very similar indeed. I'd never go back to the wine but I need to make further changes now to improve my health.