The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[ChampooPapi]

Adm1010

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

Thank you to @Adm1010 for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

Ah no judgment from me @Nouveaunew that sounds awful. I hope you feel better soon. Might be worth writing a few things down like

• What triggered it


• what coping mechanisms you could use instead


• how horrendous it made you feel

so you can reflect on this in future if you need to.
I’ve felt awful due to alcohol so many times. The longer I am sober for the less I feel the urge to drink when I’m happy/low etc. Keep working on staying sober. Be kind to yourself today - eat, sleep, hydrate and rest.

Thank you @SAB10 What you wrote is so kind & I will re-read. I dread that once I stop feeling horrendous I’ll start thinking drinking again is a good idea! I really want to write a post like your one about the BBQ! That’s very inspiring to me.

Thank you so much @BunniesBunniesBunnies Those questions are so valid. People pleading is what triggered it as I had actually been enjoying being sober. I felt like I Had to drink as I was entertaining guests. I don’t think people realise I have a bit of a problem. I hide it well! … except when I’m vomiting into the toilet bowl, that is!

*People pleasing

No judgement here either Nouveau. Stay hydrated and feel better soon. I think sometimes people feel that their drinking is being judged when friends stop drinking. Whereas non-drinkers feel that they’re the ones being judged.
well done Sab stepping back from the edge! It’s been the taste that made me step back too, and the smell.
hello to everyone, we’re in the last stretch of the Bank Holiday now. I can’t get back a page so hang in there. Apologies, I can’t get back a page without losing my post so sending a wave 👋 to you all.

@Nouveaunew no judgement here either. I suspect most of us on this thread have shameful memories. I certainly have and have recently scared myself sh***s.
Well done for taking ownership and getting back here.

Thank you @Blackberryblossom Yeah you’re right - I guess everyone worries about being judged! Thanks for the boost.

thanks @Horlicks4me Ownership is what’s needed. I finally feel ready to give up alcohol. I’m going to reread the quit lit I already own and order some more once that’s read.

well done to those of you who stayed AF this weekend.

Day 1.

@Nouveaunew hugs to you and never worry about posting here it’s support not judgement you will get back 😊

Hi @Crunchymum How are you this morning? Did you make it for your walk yesterday?

Your post really reminded me of a Claire Pooley blogpost on PAWS - she says it’s a feeling of “what’s it all for” and exhaustion that starts to hit as your brain recalibrates after giving up alcohol (from day 45 for up to 2years -ugh).

Apparently they’re cycles and will pass - we just have to ride them out. I say “we” because I’ve been hit by a huge wave of tiredness since Sunday (which was day 43 for me) and I hope it passes very soon as I’m going into a very hard week at work!

Here’s a link to one of her posts on it PAWS

Has anyone else had this?

Hope everyone else is feeling ok this morning

sab10 that's* *absolute win. It can get too easy to get caught up in counting days and any alcohol that passes your lips feels like a failure and a reset to day 1. But it's not like that. It's all a learning curve. From tiny sips, to major drinking episodes to thoughts of drinking and clear headed easy days. All of the above and more are all just learning curves on this path. Well done.

And nouveau the same. It's hard when that happens and you're bound to have a lot of emotions going through your head but I figure that once I made the decision that I wanted to stop drinking that each time I fell off the wagon just strengthened my resolve. I needed these falls to remind me why I'm doing this, why I'm putting in the hard work. It makes it more apparent why it's worth it.

Thanks onewildandpreciouslife that was an interesting read. I especially* *liked this at the end...

We had bad spells when we were drinking too, didn't we? Loads of them!

Life is indeed full of ups and downs, it isn't helped by hiding/drowning in alcohol. Tgis thought helps me realise that even with my current issue, drinking wouldn't in any help. It's just a strange gutteral reaction when things are tough. It has gone again though. It was like my in crisis brain reacts with "shut down with booze is the answer". Just ingrained habits of thought I suppose. And i can recognise that thought but not act on it.

The other stuff she talks about is interesting too. I am heading towards that 2 year milestone in the summer and a lot of what she says about that period is true. Tiredness, brain fog etc. I had put it down to menopause because I have had a few challenges around it but maybe me stopping drinking has been at play too. (As well as the small thing such as the pandemic and Lockdown etc) it has felt like a physiological issue though. I was just saying to a friend last week that I feel I am coming out of a fog that I've been in due, I presumed, fully to the menopause. I do think it was mainly that but maybe I'm also coming out of the fog of post addiction too? All food for thought.

Thank you @AlloftheTime much appreciated. A lot of judgment of myself after waking up on the bathroom floor but it’s good to know I can be honest here.

I know you’re not feeling great @Onewildandpreciouslife but big congratulations on 45 days AF! I’ll be dancing from the rooftops when I get that far. I know it’s not easy but so much better than drinking. Good luck in work.

congratulations on almost two years @Breathmiller Again, I can tell it’s not all roses but imagine how much healthier your insides are now.

And this is so so true:
I needed these falls to remind me why I'm doing this, why I'm putting in the hard work. It makes it more apparent why it's worth it

@Onewildandpreciouslife this is absolutely fascinating. No I hadn't heard of PAWS but I think it sums me up to a tee.

I am going to have a proper read (I am at work) and have a look into it.

I was expecting by 80 days to be on top of the world !!!

But I will not waver and I will not falter. Life would not be any better if I'd done a bottle (or 3) over the weekend, and I do know that.

I hope you are doing okay, 45 days is amazing.

Ah @Nouveaunew, I am another one who drank at the weekend. My DH bought some wine on offer and we shared a bottle and then I suggested moving on to the gin 😬 I’m annoyed at myself but I’m trying not to get too hung up about it. Today is a new day. I didn’t drink yesterday so can count that as a win!

Well done to all of you who have stuck with this for so long. It’s very inspiring to read.

@Juliecloud

yeah you get it. I drank a lot! I actually still feel sick and hungover today. I’m so bloody tired of this carousel. You’re right though - best to count the sober days. Day 2!

Checking in and hoping that those of you facing big challenges have got through today in one piece. Such a diverse mix of people here but so much is relatable from the posts and the issues faced by everyone.
Stay at it wherever you are on the journey.
I’ve just passed the 40 week mark and thinking back to how I was this time last year. It wasn’t good and I was in a vicious circle of stopping and starting, moderating and bingeing so while I have stayed on track since I joined this group it hadn’t always been that way.
thanks for all the support and sharing it helps in so many ways. Pat in the back for Drybird and everyone who has kept it going.

I’m happy I’ve stuck at it and generally don’t even think about alcohol these days - can’t believe I just wrote that!
I am alert to triggers but mostly just happier with myself.
have a good evening all

allofthetime huge congratulations on 40 weeks! 🥳🥳🥳That's amazing! Well done you!!

In fact, well done everyone! Whether you're on years, months, weeks, days or even hours. Just making that decision is a massive step. We ALL deserve a pat on the back.

Day 19 here. Had a crappy day. Eldest DD has had a big mental health wobble, exH is (of course) being a dickhead, and due to a software crash, I lost hours of work. I think this is the most I've craved a drink since I stopped. So I came here to remind myself why I quit, and to try to hold myself accountable.

Fluffy bunnies! I want the fluffy bunnies.

Thanks for this @AlloftheTime

I’m happy I’ve stuck at it and generally don’t even think about alcohol these days - can’t believe I just wrote that

Just popping in with some bunnies for Mango. Those early days are tough. 🐇🐇🐇

Morning all.

Phone still playing up so have to come onto the computer. Husband still on leave and I really need some peace to crack on with a client business plan. It is making me anxious.

Eating bit too much at the moment having lost weight previously. No update on the WLS so feeling a bit flat.
Had a falling out with a friend who lied to me but luckily didn't go on the booze. Normally I would get pissed and have a SM exchange. Strange how you put up with people who use you when you are in the grip of alcohol dependancy. I do feel sad but I am reminded of all the times this person has taken advantage of me financially.

Faux gin tonight.

Bunny sharing! 🐰 very generous blackberry
hope today is a little easier Mango - you are heading towards the three week mark and the first month is tough for most people so keep focused 👍

well done @SavBbunny

i’m eating a lot of unhealthy & sugary foods too … this happens every time I quit booze. I’m still feeling groggy and hungover even though I’m on Day 3. I can’t wait to start feeling well and motivated again. I just really really really want to go the distance this time … i can’t face this carousel again

I'm sorry to read that so many of you are having tough times. Special squidge for @Breathmiller who has given so much time and love and support to others on here.

The obstacle course analogy is such a good one. I like it even more now, because I imagine @BunniesBunniesBunnies in the lovely field, beckoning everyone over and waving her hands, cabin-crew style, to direct you all past the obstacles. And what Clare Pooley says about it always resonated with me: "...by three months you can see it and by six months you'll be there." I kept it in my head all through the first few months, and turned out to be true. By three months it started feeling easier, and most of the the awkward firsts were out of the way, and six months in I had a comfortably alcohol free life. Obstacles crop up from time to time, but with vigilance and honesty I have been able to avoid them.

There's nothing special about me, and there's no magic to it. Just don't drink today. One day at a time. You can do it.

@Drybird2020 is a wise bird