The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[ChampooPapi]

Adm1010

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

Thank you to @Adm1010 for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

So many provocations today. Bath over ran flooding the upstairs. Baby was sick and had to stay home whilst I juggled work. Normally I'd have had a glass of wine to blow off steam / reward myself / cool down. No such luck today. Trying to think positive and proud but mainly just pissed off.

@Tomlettegregg oh I hope your day gets better!

@Breathmiller enjoy your swim!!! And you are most welcome to die on any non feminist hill of your choosing😂😂😂 I’m quite fair I guess and my impressive body hair can only be noticed for someone came up and stroked me which I hope they won’t😂😅😂

@Kindtomyself you total legend! 7 months is fab!

bunnies blonde and enough impressive hair to be stroked. I have an image of an Afghan Hound.

Swim was yesterday and it was sooooo good. Had a go on the flumes which was great fun. . Definitely want to go more often. And my skin isn't too bad today. The pool definitely didn't smell as chlorine-y and didn't sting. Wonder if it's changed over the years.

Sorry to hear that you are having a challenging day tomlettegregg. Hope it gets easier.

I have had a bit of a revelation in terms of sugar. I felt soooo good last month not eating sugar and in true form I am on holiday and "treating" myself to lots of things that have lots of sugar. Cake, sweets, normal foods with sugar added and AF drinks. And I feel like shit!! I feel slightly sick, craving crap (which had gone completely last month) and have a constant headache. I am seriously tempted to go no-moderation and let go of it completely. Which feels such a massive step. But is it? Is it as big a step as stopping alcohol?

Why on earth do we (read I) do this to ourselves? I sometimes wish I lived in a bubble with only healthy things available and a more simple life.

I know what will make me feel good in life. Not drinking, not eating crap. Daily yoga and meditation, exercise in nature, a job I like (which I have) eating well and simplicity. But, as humans it seems we have overcomplicated the world. With too many things, too much admin, too many tempting food and drinks that do us no good at all.

I clearly have far too much time on my hands on my holidays this week as I just keeping thinking that its all out of balance.

@Breathmiller I am a bit like an Afghan hound😂 Lean and silly looking and covered in fuzz😂

With regards to sugar: I can only tell you this: Sugar has all the same effects on me and I drastically reduced carbs when I quit drinking. I didn’t cut it out completely (basically impossible as it’s in everything) but I’m very low carb these days and rarely have sweet things like chocolate and cake and sweet drinks (and much much less pasta and bread etc). I honestly do not miss it. I do have lots of other gorgeous food and plenty of fats and so I tend to snack on nuts, cheese, fruit (see, I do eat some sugar!) etc. With sugar as you know the more you eat it the more you crave it. I rarely crave it now and I feel sooo much better. Skin better, more stable blood sugars, better energy levels, less raging hunger. Rarely any headaches! I could go on. Sometimes if do have quite a bit of sugar (birthdays etc) it affects me not in a good way.
Your brain just needs to do what it did with alcohol - get used to treating yourself in different ways and it will stop craving sugar. Of course sugar is harder than alcohol in some ways as it’s EVERYWHERE and you can’t cut it out completely. But you can cut it right down.
Sorry if that sounds condescending, I think you know a lot more about nutrition than I do and obviously you’ve just done a month without and so you know all the benefits.

I just wanted to say that if you wanted to let go of it completely I think that sounds like a sound idea. You totally CAN get used to having other nice lovely foods and you will stop craving it. Good luck and hope you’re enjoying the holidays!

oh i am so on the sugar train here. well chocolate.... i have quit sugar before and it did feel better but for me it is too much right now, i think i would fall off all the other proverbial wagons and i am clinging on to!!! I do wish i could moderate just one thing in my life though !

@SavBbunny how was the interview not sure if i missed it up thread somewhere?

Happy Wednesday all

Inspired by @SavBbunny I am just stepping away from making tea to offer up to everyone who wants one. Whether you're counting your AF time in minutes, hours, days, weeks or whatever.
Also - what a great attitude to ordering in pubs @Onewildandpreciouslife - I am going to borrow that!

I've been having much less sugar than usual and weirdly feel less hungry and certainly not craving biscuits and chocolate for breakfast or salty goods like i have for the last however many years. Anyone have any experience of how long it takes for ALT levels to lower after stopping drinking?

I'm another one feeling that abstinence from sugar needs to be my future. My inability to moderate is not confined to alcohol, it turns out.

Good morning all,
Had horrendous two days.
Old employer (the shitey one) is buying out my new one. I am toast!
Cried at airport and needed to be home. Had to have belt extender on the plane so felt embarrassed and like i should be harpooned.
I have Thursday therapy today so hope to feel better.
I am taking up swimming from next week. I have skirted bottoms and virtually no body hair as pale and blonde. Will be going early with the geriatrics as to avoid the fitness fanatics.
Gordon's af for me tonight.

Morning all. Aw sounds like a very shite day for you yesterday @SavBbunny, keep strong.

Joining in on the sugar conversation and other addictions - I eat too much fruit and need to cut back really - I don't eat a lot of cakes or biscuits but I do manage to get through loads of fruit. I've also now got a bought coffee habit which is far too expensive. I'm buying a coffee a day and love it but I can't keep doing it...

@SavBbunny sounds like a shitty day. The swimming will help clear the mind although where I go there are some very geriatric fitness freaks but they provide entertainment for me to watch whilst I swim (think 70 year old in speedos, stretching and doing press ups pool side 🤣🤣🤣). Enjoy the AF gin.

Oh @SavBbunny I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time.

But I am SO PLEASED you are taking up swimming!!! I really hope you will love it!!!

Be kind to yourself and hang in there.

@Drybird2020 I unfortunately can’t do anything in moderation either. It’s hard but I make the most of it now by getting addicted to things like swimming🤣🤣🤣

savbunny I'm so sorry that things feel shit at the moment. Well done at not drinking through it. I hope you enjoy your swim as much I did.

It's so interesting to hear the sugar conversation. I really do feel it's time for me to let go of sugar. I cannot believe the difference between how I felt last month and then this. It has all the trademarks of my relationship with alcohol.

I hear myself resisting making the decision, the same conversationsI had around alcohol. "I'll wait til after my holidays. I have a house full of sugar. I can't do it! I don't want to! Life will be boring without cake! It's too hard! I can just cut down! It's not that bad!"

How funny that it's the same thought process.

But...I'm trying to think...
"I felt so much better! I looked so much better! I had more energy! No headaches! No binging! Lost weight (especially round my middle). No mood swings- sugar crashes! Skin looked great!"

I can feel myself drifting towards letting it go. And I honestly don't think I would be able to have even contemplated it if I hadn't stopped drinking. I do have to admit to thinking "not today - I'll start tomorrow- I have guests coming for lunch!" But there will ALWAYS be a celebration/holiday/shit day that needs sugar to commemorate/commiserate.

Maybe a thread to support giving up sugar is the way forward. I don't want to derail this thread if it's not relevant to a lot of people. I keep thinking if you lot can help me to not drink then it can only help to have a team to stop sugar too.

I found a new sugar free thread that I have posted on. It's over on weight chat. (Although I was reticent to go on these boards)
Feel free to join in anyone. I (think) I've decided to go for it. EeK! I'm as nervous about this as I was about giving up alcohol.

Good luck @Breathmiller, you can do it!!! Everything you are saying sounds so recognisable. I don’t have any wise words but just wanted to say that if you can quit drinking, you can do this, in fact you can probably do anything you put your mind to!

yes goo luck @Breathmiller i'm still happily trolling along in the .... 'lala land i can moderate when i need to' zone for my sugar intake... I realise this is complete and utter bollocks but hey... it's a journey right

Posted in the old thread without realising so hope it's ok to re-post here. @SavBbunny thank you for your reply - feeling physically better but just hoping people aren't thinking the worst of me 😞

I need some accountability so I'm posting on here hoping someone will respond.

I need to stop drinking and previously have managed big periods but then a social event will come, I think I can handle it but really I don't know when to stop. This doesn't happen every time I drink or at every social situation I drink at, but it happens enough that the anxiety and worry the next day is cropping up and making me feel rubbish too much.

So I just came back from an in-person 3 day work conference. I had decided I wasn't going to drink at all as last time I did at this event years ago I drank too much, missed half a day of the event and was probably obviously pissed/hung over. Well, I failed again, not to quite the same level but last night I stayed up really late with some of the attendees drinking/chatting. Felt awful today, but mainly the worry about saying/doing something embarrassing because there's big bits I can't remember - including going back to my room/bed!!

It was all going so well as well! Its like when a social situation I had been nervous about is actually going well I don't know when to stop/don't seem able to pay attention to how drunk I'm getting.

Anyway I've decided I need to stop. I can't moderate, I suck at it. My 3 year old recently joked he was 'drinking his alcohol'... I don't want him to think of me and think of wine!!

I loved when I was pregnant as it meant an excuse for not drinking that no one could judge, I am so worried about what people will think/how to approach not drinking in social situations that thats why event when I've said to myself I won't drink, I end up doing, as I don't know how to say no thanks without feeling awkward.

Please help!!

oh @Dahlia91 i think we have all been where you are, I know i can't moderate, I can but only for a short time and once i have had a glass well the bar is wide open. There is a good reason for this alcohol is addictive, a depressant, a poison and the reason why you feel the way you do. For me it has to be nothing. I've not yet had to explain much about why i am not drinking but there are some great excuses (antibiotics/health kick etc) some semi truths (alcohol doesn't work for me, I find i am poorly, it's my age i can't tolerate it) and the straight up (I don't drink, I don't want to, why do you YOU drink when it is an addictive, carcinogenic, depressant? turn it right back at them...) i think different ones for different situations is fine.

Have you tried any quit lit? I have found allen carr and This naked mind really helpful in the changing my attitude to alcohol. Seeing through the facade to what it really is.. There is loads of great support on here too. I'ms ure some of our veteran quitters will offer some sage advice soon.

in the meantime be kind to yourself, you won't be the only person who doesn't remember going to bed but you are owning up to it here and setting yourself up for a good future when you will always remember.

@Fortheloveofgodwhy thanks for your response - that's a really good few suggested responses/reasons for why your not drinking, thanks!

I don't understand why sometimes I can do that easily and other times I can't, like I get carried away and forget that I didn't want to drink/drink too much - how is it some people can moderate on every occasion and I just fail too often!!

I've just downloaded the Quit like a woman audio book to listen to and been checking out the naked mind - thanks for the suggestion!

I just wish I knew what I did/said as while I don't think I did anything outrageous I know I was talking a lot and to important people!!

@Dahlia91

I found the 30 day challenge very helpful. You read it as you go along (same author as Naked Mind). I read it and have decided to continue. I'm only just over 50 days but it's a start.

With regards to sugar.

I gave up all "refined" sugar (cakes / biscuits / chocolate) for lent. I'm still having carbs though.

Can't see I've seen much difference in weight or skin or anything but I've been eating my bodyweight in peanuts and Tuc cheese sandwich biscuits and kettle chips

Just checking in at just over 7 months AF . Sorry I’m not contributing much at the minute . I’m out of the groove I think but hoping I can dip in and out . Take care all x

@Dahlia91 it’s very normal to worry about other people’s reactions, but honestly most people won’t care!!! Why would they?! I have had many one or two negative comments about my sobriety in two years, LOADS of positive comments and the vast majority of people don’t comment at all because they don’t even care or notice!

I found saying something noncommittal like “ohh drinking just isn’t really working for me right it, it gives me headaches/ruins my sleep etc” really helpful. But most people really won’t ask you to explain yourself.
Hope that’s reassuring x

adm1010
Absolutely fine to dip in and out as you like. Hope all is well.

dahlia91 all sounds so familiar. The amount of times I'd say I wasn't going to drink at an event or "just have one!" and then I seemed to go the opposite. .

End of day 19, and have reached the end of my holiday still AF. That’s the first dry holiday for a very long time! Feeling a bit tired and flat this evening - will hopefully feel better in the morning