Alcohol Explained. Day one

[onedayiwillflyaway1]

Hello,
I'm a long time lurker and long time drinker. I've had the day off work today and after another boozy night and my anxiety this morning this lead me to have a beer for hair of the dog. I suddenly realised this is heading only one way, so I downloaded Alcohol Explained and spent the afternoon listening to it whilst sipping my last bottle of wine. Even though I know my own journey of how I got here, it was truly an eye opener and is one of those books that once read, denial is now not an option.
I'm now wide awake with one beer left but I've decided that tomorrow is my day one of quitting alcohol altogether. I've tried moderation, occasional abstinence etc but it always sucks me back in and now I know why. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow but I know I can get through it hopefully now fully armed with the knowledge I've just heard. My plan is to use this thread to track my journey and share my experience. Lastly I would like to thank each and everyone of you who have shared your experience over the years.

It’s the first 5 chapters. V good

Thank you so much! It's lovely to have got to nearly 10pm without a drink - I wasnt sure if I could but will def be ok till bedtime now. Also lovely to be able to tell this- would be too embarrassing and a bit weird to talk to anyone I know about trying to stop as I've always presented myself as someone who loves alcohol in an enjoyable way! Which used to be true I guess...
I loved the tip about maxing out on crisps! I'd actually gone for a combo of crisps, peanuts and haribos which was bad plan as feel a bit ill now - worth it though!

Morning all. BrightonBunny yes, I recommend book 2 of alcohol explained, it's the reinforcement which is key to staying sober. What freedom it is, I relate to what you say about wasted weekends & going to ground. That link is so helpful Cleanbedlinen for anyone starting out to make the switch. Lauren850 well done & I would say push through the not so great feelings of the next few days with determination knowing that your body is doing important work getting rid of the alcohol & that you will come out the other side.The book explains the physical recovery as well as the psychological & how they are linked.

Sorry I've been absent lately. So nice to read all your updates. When I first posted I was in such a desperate state, listening to alcohol explained flipped a switch. I'm like a whole new person now my life is back on track. Ive reconnected with old friends and made new ones, my routine is so much better and sleep golly that's just the cherry on the cake. I still have ups and downs but that's life. Do I miss alcohol? I can honestly answer no I don't.

Hi everyone, and hi onedayiwillflyaway that is such good news I’m pleased for you! And very pleased I found your thread, you might not know it, but you are an inspiration! It’s when you mention a good nights sleep that I’m super keen!
Glad the link may help theoriginalchatelaine youa are super duper supportive too, thank you! and lauren850 well done, that’s amazingly brilliant! I’m glad the crisp tip helped, Haribos too eh? You are raising the bar!.
Seriously well done you.🥳😀💐and all of us! Hurrah! You know what’s nice? Being in bed with a cuppa looking forward to a solid nights sleep.

Good morning all. Cleanbedlinen going to bed after an alcohol free day is awesome I know the witching hour is a huge hazard for some & that's why changing routines is important & also a bit of forward planning. Just this last week I've been confident enough to drive myself to our nearest big town & it was so enjoyable. Also I drove to a late afternoon appointment, unheard of! The only thing that prevented me doing that in the past was my drinking, I was severely limiting myself. I have completely surrendered myself to the AF message in the book & I stand refusing to snared by alcohol again. It feels empowering. I'm doing quite ordinary things for the first time without the haze. Getting to know the real me is nice. My previous arrogance in thinking I didn't have a problem & everything was fine is in the past. There are still a few occasions when I get a physical reaction to excitement, a kind of sweep across the brain calling for alcohol but I know this is the deep psychological habit of years. I can recognise & importantly reject it in my conscious brain & it goes away. Take control back, it's our gift to ourselves. I hope you all have some goodness & joy in your day.

Hello all, checking in to say hello. Life has been a bit busy, overwhelming, but all good. Day 46 now. So nice to read everyone's updates. My liver blood tears were all normal apparently so that is great news, just the ultrasound to go now. Will try and post more soon.

Glad to hear your results were normal Borrowbox that's reassuring news. I've just been listening to a little bit from AE2 & the word torture was used, very apt I thought.

Checking in after the end of my working week. How is everyone? I had a good work day, quite relaxed and got to that point where I rounded the week off nicely. Normally I am typing my way out of the door with last minute emails.

Re-reading your post @TheOriginalChatelaine and completely agree. I am also getting to know the real me again. I almost feel like I have gone back in time to the teenage me, before I discovered drinking. Like I have to start again, learning what I like. I am getting the impulse physical reactions too, seems to be more a reaction to positive feelings. I am trying to challenge every single one with the reality of it and it seems to be working. Big challenge next week though, birthday and then away the first week of the Easter holidays.

Hope everyone is going OK.

Morning just checking in. I was just reflecting on how good it is to wake up on such a beautiful day feeling fresh and energised. I've started eating breakfast again something I couldn't do whilst drinking and that has really helped my mood and energy levels. I've been tackling a bit of shrub land at the back of my garden and I've bought some fruit bushes so im going to plant them today. Homemade lemonade is the beverage of choice today. @borrowbox and @Theoriginalchatelaine @Cleanbedlinen12 have a lovely weekend

Hurrah borrowbox that’s great news indeed. 🥳🥳🥳🥳
And v interesting that you are getting more in control with emails on a Friday too. From what you all say, this seems getting back in control is a massive benefit.
theorignialchatelaine you are right about the witching hour and I’d forgotten about forward planning, it’s essential! ESP. When Dp opens a bottle on a sunny evening. Luckily there was a packet of crackers and a cuppa nearby !
Well done, it’s so nice to read what you are achieving now. It’s the little things - and I think they have massive Knock on effects. It’s so interesting to read how your thinking is changing too everyone.
I’m jealous of you going away! Dd has practice exams and Dp has work and so we are stuck here again. We are all bored, or rather I am. Which is part of the reason I try and recreate my 20s I think!
Have a super day oneday and everyone. We’ve just put in an apple tree! Enjoy the fruit. And the sun.

Hello all, checking in. Really struggling tonight, the moderation voice is constant right now and feel like it is almost trying to set me up for an inevitable failure. I won't drink tonight and just hope tomorrow is a better day.

Hi Borrowbox,

How are you this morning? I've had those thoughts especially now the weather is getting warmer. Just a couple and no more my thoughts tell me. It feels so unfair that it appears others can do that. But can they? Maybe they can for now, and what am I really missing out on? It's a trick remember that, I think I'm going to listen to the book again just to cement the message that brought me here.

Hello @onedayiwillflyaway1 thanks for checking on me. I am a lot better today, and so pleased I managed to ride out that craving. I woke up refreshed this morning and did a proper clean before cards and presents. I was able to be a cheerful Mummy. I have a bit if time to myself now before another family day. My family are fully supportive of me not drinking and doubt anyone will drink today.

Thanks for your kind words. I completely agree with you. I might need to re-read the book. Day 50 today though, so definitely worth celebrating!

Hope everyone has a lovely sober Sunday.

@borrowbox sounds like a lovely Sunday so glad you rode out that craving each time you flex that muscle it will get stronger.
Day 50 is an amazing achievement and how lovely you can enjoy Mothers refreshed and fully present.

borrowbox you are so brilliant to keep it up and enjoy being a mum and not a tired grouchy blurgh. Well done.
oneday it’s kind of reassuring to hear your thought processes, and that your answer is to read the book again.
I hope everyone had a nice day. I really enjoyed waking early to cuddles and cards off my two. And a day in the garden. It’s the nicest day we’ve had in ages. I think it may be down to me not being vaguely hungover and irrational. Happy Mother’s Day to all. 💐

Thank you both, I had a lovely day and have started the week well.

How is everyone doing? So glad you had a nice day @Cleanbedlinen12 I am finding it so much easier to be a good Mum when not always recovering from the night before!

Thanks borrowbox! It’s been a long time since we’ve had a nice time. I really hope it lasts for a while. I’m glad you started the week off well. I did my usual of panicking and not knowing where to focus and..yup, getting nowhere.if there’s emails and things I get so distracted and confused! Something else to work on. Another night af.
How’s everyone else? lauren850 are you ok? Feel free to say hi.
Just to say I I find it’s important to check in, especially if I’ve slipped up. It now means I think twice, knowing I’m going to admit it on here!
Hope everyone is ok.

Hi
Can I join please ?
Not sure if this thread is just for those completely abstaining .... if so please feel free to boot me off !
Today is day 1 for me of not drinking in the week . Quite a challenge for me and looking to join a group on here for mutual support .
This evening was fine . Good if anything .The thought on the way home was pants though !

It’s not my thread, but am sure you are very welcome! How did it go tonight? Some people are managing to abstain which is amazing, me, I’ve slipped a couple of times and totally realise it sucks. I think knowing I’ll have to admit it on here, is a real incentive as everyone is so supportive and doing so well. It’s an inspiration! Hope tonight went ok, yay! Well done! if not, yay! , you are mentally preparing and will do it tomorrow. Well done!

On our way back home today after a tour to visit firstly our daughter & then friends. We have eaten out & in & all easily AF for me. I've broken the ingrained association between eating, socialising and alcohol. I'm enjoying life so much more, taking things in much better. Sleeping better & much less irritable. If need be I can bring to mind in an instant awful feelings about alcohol, both physical & emotional which would stop me dead in my tracks a few weeks ago. I now am not spending time on thinking about it but I acknowledge how important it is to continue to check in & read others' stories. AF is giving better hair & skin, better than any expensive product. I feel younger. A neighbour died last week of alcohol related illnesses, the husband has told me of his struggle with alcohol & his journey to sobriety & so I confided in him & he said he was so profoundly touched that I understood & that I had told him. It was so natural & makes it so real & enabling to move on. So, along we go, giving ourselves this gift of self respect, nurture & self-care.

I cannot drink responsibly.
I cannot moderate my drinking.
One drink leads to another.
I surrender to that self knowledge & I'm happy about it, it's not a negative, just a fact of life that once acknowledged brings relief from a constant struggle.

@Theoriginalchatelaine such an amazing post thank you for sharing.

@Easterdaffsx of course you are welcome, I'm abstaining because i've tried moderating only drinking on certain days but it didn't work out for me.
@Cleanbedlinen12 so glad you are still here and posting.
My cravings have subsidised some, really enjoying going to bed with an audiobook and a cup of tea.

@easterdaffsx welcome. How are you finding it?

Great post @TheOriginalChatelaine

I am still here, quite tired this week but just plodding on. I find I am really looking forward to my nightly ritual now of tea and a good book too @onedayiwillflyaway1 I am about to go up now. It is lovely to look forward to such a healthy and positive thing. Have definitely cracked the weekly drinking which feels so good. About to hit 53 days in a couple of minutes.

Thanks both
Going really well here I think .
3rd night and reading Beat the Booze with cuppa ! X x