Staying Stopped - Alcohol Free, permanently.

[Drybird2020]

This thread is a kind and supportive environment for anyone committing to an alcohol free life.

From Day 1 onwards, you are welcome here for support, encouragement, tips and chat. There are many of us, at different points on the journey some have been sober for years, months, or weeks, others are just starting out, but all are
committed to an alcohol free life and the freedoms it brings...

Freedom from the tyranny of booze and the effort of figuring out how much to drink, and how and when to procure and drink it.

Freedom from guilt, self loathing, and 3am wake ups, and the fear of what might have been said and done the night before.

Freedom from the pervasive sense of dread and shame.

Freedom to embrace life with energy, and to face challenges with an uncluttered head, a lighter heart, and a lighter recycling bin.

If you've not yet decided whether total abstinence is for you, do feel free to hang out and ask questions but please be aware that discussion of drinking can be triggering, especially for those in the early stages of sobriety.

If you are still drinking, or planning on moderating (and this includes occasional or once in a blue moon drinking) have a look at the moderation threads, which might be a better fit for you.

I check in here every day as part of my recovery. It has kept me accountable, and the wonderful posters who contribute have helped me more than they could possibly know. This is day 137, and I'll be here for a long time!

@ColdGreenTeaMug sure can! I'm having chocolate.

Oh by the time Dowton abbey ended I could not be bothered sorting it out! So i have eaten a pack of wine gums and had a glass of chocolate milk for dinner. It was quite okay. :) But I am taking a day off tomorrow so might sort myself out then for an Indian takeaway..... mmmmm...... cravings.....

I hope everyone is fine. I am in bed already. Sober sleep is the best thing ever.

My goodness coldgreen you are not half in bed early! I guess you maybe get up really early too? I hope your migraine has passed Drybird one of my DCs gets them and they knock him right out of it.

I’ve had a busy day working then gardening and yoga in the evening. Will be bath then bed. Definitely like an Indian takeaway. ( and the pizza and chocolate). Goes great with a Becks Blue too.
Welcome to the thread Ravenswick BTW I don’t know if this is good or bad for you but Halloween is a bit more than 100 days away (24+31+30+31)....about 116 days! Let’s all aim for that, it’s nice to have new targets.

Evening all. Still plodding away. Day 70 something. I was on duty last night and was called until very late last night and when I got back OH was up making a hot drink. Very unusual. He confessed that he's been feeling very low lately and been suffering from panic attacks and dr has prescribed Valium. Makes sense of why he's been such a grumpy twat. Wish he had told me; it wouldn't have excused behaviour but I could have perhaps made more sense of it.
Welcome to all the new people too. So glad you are finding our ramblings useful. What has struck me is it's much easier when you get into the habit of NOT drinking and that happens faster than you think.
Had 3 hours sleep last night and have a mad busy day of meetings and visits tomorrow and I'm not tired. I fear I am running on adrenaline. When I got home in the small hours and OH and I sat and chatted for an hour I was shattered. I'd been asleep for an hour and my phone rang for a job over the phone. I really hope I don't crash and burn. I now realise when I did drink (which wasn't all the time) it was definitely a switch off mechanism and sleep came very easily. This is a new way of life. Different, better and healthier but different way.
To those who have just started it does get easier. It becomes a habit just like drinking did. And if you're really stuck put this image in your head. The old smelly French men treading the grapes with infected ingrowing toenails and veruccas a plenty. And on that visual delight I'll bid you goodnight.

Checking in on DAY 40!!!

I am absolutely loving some of the dark humour accounts about sobriety on Insta. For anyone who wants to check them out my current favs are @fucking_sober and @brutalrecovery and @sobergrind ... Please recommend any you like - memes are all that keeps me going sometimes.

Woohoo, well done @myhandsareverycold and @Hangingover .....day 40 here too!

I had a craving for the first time in ages yesterday but luckily I was in a car stuck in traffic (probably hence the craving) and it passed very quickly. I opened a non alcoholic Amstel beer when I got home, but when I looked at the bottle it said it was 3 per cent so low rather than AF. I thought about saying ‘fuck it’ as what harm could that do anyway?? But I was so scared of the feeling of being drunk, of wanting to drink more, and of falling off the wagon that I tipped it down the sink.

40 days has definitely changed me

Morning all, and apologies @iamyourequal - my maths is shockingly bad so not surprising I got it wrong...However definitely on day 5 here :-)

@myhandsareverycold you sound as if you are under a lot of pressure at the moment, do take care of yourself.

All your ramblings have been really valuable and so encouraging; even when people are finding it hard. Before I took this step I sometimes used to think back longingly to the days before I started drinking and envying that more carefree mindset; I'm hoping to rediscover that.

Off to Insta to take a look at @Hangingover's tips...

I am fed up, drinking every night and feeling like shite.
I want to stop
How are all you amazing people doing?

Morning all . I've been lurking on the threads the past few days because my head's been full of other stuff but I just wanted to say hello to the newcomers and saying a big well done however far you are in your journey.

I've now got a couple of weeks off work (save for a few hours on Friday) and I am relishing it as I want to get back on track with looking after myself and injecting a bit of fun into family life as it feels like it's been a big slog the past few months. Still to do it without a drop of alcohol has been such an achievement the old me wouldn't be able to get my head around.

I'd love a carefree mindset @ravenswick! And hopefully by lightening the load that will come, however briefly. Today, I am planning on yoga, taking the girls out for a drive and ice cream up the coast. It's 15 degrees here as well so we'll need to wrap up well! Also trying to go for a run later on.

Hope you enjoy your day off too @ColdGreenTeaMug and that you get your takeaway tonight!

Just checking in to wave to all and welcome newbies. I’m still here & still sober! Will catch up with the thread later hopefully!

Hey @HedgeHogFoxBadger, you are in the right place :-) I've tried to stop (and have stopped/moderated for a while) in the past but it always felt like a huge battle. What feels different so far this time is my mindset - I feel lucky to have stopped and excited about keeping going.

Maybe it is a bit like working with dogs or horses (or children) - positive reinforcement sometimes gets you further than negative and certainly feels more fun when you are on the receiving end.

For me, I am starting to see this as a reward in itself, and a positive, life-enhancing step, rather than a deprivation or beating myself up for being so rubbish/lacking control in the past. It feels very different so far (am desperately hoping this Pollyanna spirit continues...!).

Hope your day goes well @Ulysses - wet and foggy here so no inspiration from that for sure!

Yy to the positive shift in mindset. This time around I felt something click in my brain, and I knew I could do it. On previous attempts I wanted to be sober but wasn't sure I could, or on some level I wasn't one hundred percent convinced I wanted to. It took me a few goes to get to the point of doing it for real. Its a pattern I've noticed with some sober buddies, and read about in quit lit. Definitely a thing.

This one made me fall about laughing
God it's good to have a bit of humour about quitting!

Same as drybird - tried a few times but knew I couldnt- or wouldn't because I didn't want- to do it. This time definitely felt different. A mind shift.
@Hangingover that is hilarious 😂 ashamed to say I'm not on instagram 🙈 just don't understand it and can't figure out how to work it. I should ask my 14 year old dd as insta is life and all that haha

I can't cope with insta either!! Social media in general doesn't do anything for me. This is about as social as I get 😂

Keep them coming, @Hangingover!

Checking in on day 80! Not doing so well on the no smoking front but starting again tomorrow.

Well done to those of you who have reached amazing milestones. I loved reading about the benefits you've experienced. I can definitely identify with the change in mindset thing - it does feel different this time.

Thanks for the insta inspo Hangingover. I don't have facebook or twitter but I'm a sucker for instagram!

I’ve got a Fitbit and noticed today that my resting heart rate has gone down every single day since I stopped drinking! I’m amazed - it’s never been this low and I am so chuffed to get a result so fast :-) Keep going all!

love that meme hanging.

On another topic I have had a few weeks of getting the sweats. Comes and goes. I;m 48 so i am assuming menopause. But a bit of me wonders if it is mild coronavirus symptoms. How do you tell the difference??!!

[googles]

I am having a Real Housewives bingefest. Then off for takeaway!

oh- also I got an alcohol free riesling called Eins Zwei Zero.

It was not too bad !

@Drybird2020 I can manage Facebook but that's my limit😂

@ColdGreenTeaMug step away from doctor google. Have you any other symptoms? Maybe ring your gp?

thanks. No other symptoms. But you are right. I will call the GP

@ColdGreenTeaMug You can request a coronavirus test if you have symptoms (including a temperature). But a chat with your GP is a good idea. Hope you feel better soon.

Evening all, just sitting here with the devil on my shoulder so thought I'd come in and read some posts on this thread. Hope you are all safe and well x

hey there stoptheride.

Bath and quit lit? Followed by a hot chooclate? Plus posting is always good. :)

In the past 4 weeks I have saved £262. I have spent that all already on plants from B&Q

What are you planning on doing with what you have saved this week stop ?

Kids in the bath first.. we've been out to the local wildlife park in the main. I most definitely won't drink past 8pm so another hour to keep busy and remind myself why I've stopped!!!

Don't get me started on treating myself.. 😆 I've yet to disclose the paddle board in the boot of my car costing a small fortune and I've booked myself a 1-2-1 lesson for Sunday am. I do have a book upstairs on the bedside cabinet I need to pick up.. Ant Middleton .. the fear bubble, definitely time to pick it up.