Still stopped in 2020; a thread for anyone abstaining from alcohol.

[Drybird2020]

Dry January is over and the next phase has begun! Wherever you are on your sobriety journey, you're welcome here for encouragement, advice and support.

We love hearing from people who have been dry for a long time, so if you've swung by to have a look, please post to inspire us!

Equally, if you've woken up hungover, regretful and ashamed, determined that it's the last time, we've all been there and we're here for you now.

Lurky-lurkers, we know you're there! I observed the alcohol support threads for years before I felt ready to take the plunge, I hope these threads help others; if and when you feel ready to post, you'll get a warm welcome.

Might I respectfully ask that if your aim is moderation, you join the long running moderation thread in this topic. I find moderation chat difficult; it weakens my resolve, and many others feel the same.

I'm Drybird, 31 days sober. In that time I have saved 183 units, £192, and 12600 calories! I intend to be sober for the rest of my life, and I use this thread to keep me accountable.

It would be great to know how everyone is getting on, so if you'd like to check in below, please do! No need to share stats unless you want to, just give us a wave.

Here's tae us!

It's good to think about big events in advance, @Ontheshingle. Must be nerve-wracking waiting especially with reduced opportunities for distraction.

@StillDumDeDumming you are funny! What I did today was... I didn't drink. Same tomorrow. And so on. I can't ever start again because I'd have to come clean on the thread and I don't think I could bear it.

@BunniesBunniesBunnies have you read The Sober Diaries? I have just started The Sober Revolution which is resonating with me.

How’s everyone doing? I had a bit of a meltdown trying to cook dinner. Some days pretty much my only achievement is to stay AF, so I’m very glad to be doing this.

Staying AF IS an achievement. Anything else counts as a bonus. Did you get any dinner in the end, @SparklingLime?

I'm OK... Work was tedious but I don't have to do any tomorrow which is a welcome treat.

Hello everyone, I’ve been watching this thread since January and have felt encouraged by all your posts and reading recommendations.
Today Is my 100 days sober and I feel unbelievable. I haven’t gone this long without a drink since I was pregnant with my 30 year old DD .Thank you all .

Hello you lovely lot. I started work at 8am and I've just got home now. Whilst driving home I thought how lovely it would be to have a gin and tonic. I've got home and poured myself a fizzy water. Proud of myself, 10 consecutive days since I started.

How is everyone feeling about the forthcoming long weekend accompanied by the sunshine? I feel reassured that I'm on duty and therefore cannot drink.

Welcome @Splendidsunrise ant HUGE congratulations on doing 100 days. That's very impressive. How do you feel compared to when you drank?

My life is so much better now. I’m sleeping like a log have loads of energy and I’m hell of a lot richer . I can watch television and not have to watch a programme a second time because I’d forgotten what had happened the first time or even remember watching it !
My days seemed to revolve around buying wine ,drinking it and getting rid of the bottles at different recycling bins . I’d buy boxed wine to escape the bottles but just ended drinking more .

@Splendidsunrise, Congratulations on 100 days!! And thank you for delurking for your big milestone. I agree that freedom from the Shame of Recycling is a huge benefit, far bigger than I had expected.

@myhandsareverycold, the post-work witching hour is a tough one, you did well to handle it like that after a long day. Might it help to eat as soon as you get in?

@Splendidsunrise, 100 days, that's fantastic! I agree, the time you get back from not drinking, thinking about drinking, or managing the fallout from drinking, is so worth it.

I'm dealing with the long weekend by baking, and planning a VE afternoon tea in the garden with DH. So what if it is just the two of us? I'm getting out the china plates, tablecloth and napkins, filling jamjars with flowers and greenery and have decorated with flags and bunting. Lots of tea and cake in the sunshine.

@Splendidsunrise 100 days..wow that's amazing, well done!
@ElsaCragg - that sounds really lovely. I may have to whip up some scones.

Thank you all for your congratulations,it’s been very hard at times but you have helped me through it .

I personally found it rewarding to count the weeks, 14 weeks and 2 days seems incredible.

Not that I feel as though I’ve reached the finish line, this not drinking has to carry on. I know from my own experience that just one little innocent drink will send me back onto the miserable merrygoround.

Hello all. I nearly cracked last night. We have da socially distanced street party with a big of a Vera Lynn singalong - bunting, champagne, our street really went to town.

My husband (who is lovely and VERY supportive) said to me why don't you have just one glass? And I thought about it. And then thought no, I have done so well, what a shame it would be to undo 150 odd days AF.

So I reached for my fizzy elderflower and drank that instead. Feel superhuman today as I really nearly did cave last night.

Fear of booze/immune system/covid is also an impetus at the moment.

@Growingboys - well done! You should feel super human! So glad for you that you didn't cave after that long.

@Splendidsunrise - I can relate to that. If I have one drink, I'll be back to where I was.

How's everyone doing today?
My sleep has got really bad the last 4 days. Can't seem to settle and when I do sleep I'm having weird dreams again, and keep waiting waking myself up turning over.

Hey guys, hope you’re all hanging in there. I can’t believe it but it will be 4 weeks for me tomorrow!!!!!!!!
I don’t even think much of drinking at the moment (though I have the odd craving). I’ve been having a tough time at home so I am extra proud.

To deal with the stress though I have been smoking occasionally. I’m not a full time smoker, more of an occaional stress/social smoker. I know it seems ridiculous to not drink but smoke instead (smoking must be more harmful) but honestly I think going back to drinking would be worse for me now than smoking.

Not excusing it though and hoping to quit. Does any one else struggle with other addictive behaviours when not drinking? Or have you given up all your bad habits at once?

Hi Everyone, glad to hear of Bank Holiday weekend sobriety, especially @Growingboys for defeating serious temptation - you won, and the way you feel today is the prize!

@BunniesBunniesBunnies, its caffeine with me. I keep thinking I must cut back. But even if I have a coffee late in the day, I'm still ready for sleep at bedtime.

@jess3817 perhaps your unconscious is processing some full-on stuff in the wake of quitting. Just a guess. Vivid dreams were certainly part of it for me, but they seem to have claimed down now.

A question for the runners on here--what the hell do I do with my phone while I run? I need it for music and so Laura can tell me when to run and when to walk, but tucking it into my bra makes my boobs all squashy and it comes out sweaty at the end.

I'm not going to be much help here @Drybird2020 - I don't run with my phone, just have my watch on. I can't run with music🙈😂 alot of my friends have zips in the backs of their leggings that it fits into. But moat have one of those arm holder thingys - think you can get them fairly cheap.

@Drybird2020 I have leggings with pockets for phone! Invest in good leggings if you can afford it, most have pockets for phone now. I never got on with tha armbands, they always fall down on me (I have weird skinny arms though).

Just reading a thread in Active at the moment about dumb stuff people have done whilst drunk. I’m not at all smug as oh boy I have some memories myself, but by god am I glad I am sober now!!!

I have a running belt @Drybird2020 from Decathlon which I use to hold my phone.

I've tried arm phone holders, pockets in leggings, holding it... but the belt is best as it's so easy to get the phone into and out of without stopping running.

And yes @BunniesBunniesBunnies I am eating more but also running more to compensate!

Morning all.

Just checking in to say hi.

What I LOVE about being AF is that you have so much more time. I have spent about 6 horus or so this weekend catching up on work I missed, and wheras usually I would now collapse in fron of the tv with wine (yes, even before noon) instead I am drinking herbal tea and cooking a chicken pie for lunch.

Sobriety is giving myself the gift of time.

I hope evryone is well and thanks so much for all your support earlier this week when i needed it. I read everything and am really grateful.

Excellent news, @GreenTeaMug 😊
I attempted to give up excessive comfort eating shortly after going AF, @BunniesBunniesBunnies, which is going OK, but my phone use has gone through the roof. All distractions, I guess. Sometimes I get a desperate urge for just something to take the edge off... living . Not cravings for alcohol particularly, but for something.

Day 13 of my new enforced abstinence. Total days since 2020 - 68.

Feeling ok but a bit bored in the evenings although I am sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring. I had a call at 10pm last night so my duty is by no means over.

How's everyone's weekend been? It's almost a relief that it's cold and windy tonight as I find the lure of wine harder to resist when it's summery.

Another new week tomorrow.

Well done to everyone who reached the amazing 100 day milestone.

Thanks for the running tips, I now have a phoneful of open tabs related to leggings with pockets, and running belts which look suspiciously like bumbags by another name. ☺️

@SparklingLime I know what you mean, exactly, about the elusive "something" . Maybe I need to learn to accept and appreciate that life is good in itself, and not look for accelerants.

Morning all.

Just checking in for a Monday.

I hope you all have a very good week.