Wankerbastards and summer sunshine will make us want the bloody wine. But tryers to be dryers won't give up, and ice cold becks blue we will sup.

[Frouby]

Thread 7 for the tryers.

Join us for tips and support for encouraging a more healthy relationship with alcohol. Whether you want to drink less, or not at all, stay in your units or just cut down this is the thread for friendship, support, tips and ideas.

Absolutely no judgements here, but there will possibly be swearing.

Other threads are dotted around but I have yet to master a clicky link.

Hugs, Senseless. I can relate to so much of what you write. As always, it's other things that conspire to make us want a drink. Please let us know how you get on. We are all here.

I'm sorry Kayaking Boy didn't turn up, Frouby, as I wanted to buy a hat for the wedding.

My DC are, like yours, back to school tomorrow and Wed. THANK GOD.

Hope Fatclub went well...

Leaving, I'd be joining in too. Sigh.

Thank you for the solidarity.

LeavingAqaba - I understood what you meant!

Dion - how are things going with you?

Frouby - just reading your post makes me feel tired.

AF today. Alone, calm, and on the tea. Well. I say calm - calm in myself - but fucking shitting bricks over the political situation. FUCK

Frouby how was fatclub? I'm glad DD was ok that 17 yr old did,t come around in the end. I find that with my DD she is much cooler about things like that than I ever was.
Aqua I rarely see my family now and I miss them, although living abroad was in part to escape ex in laws. I get on fine with them now but before too close.
Senseless I think you are quite hard on yourself, you don't seem to drink way over your limit and have no problem being AF? How is the running going?
The political situation is worrying. I've no idea if I'll be able to stay n France after 17 yrs here and a French husband if Boris decides to get rid of a lot of ilmigrants from the UK

DS back to school tomorrow. No teaching for me until Thursday but still lots to do. A particularly dirty changeover today. I'm quite shocked at how some families don't even sweep or vacuum during a weeks stay, don't wipe down the cooker and leave poo and we'd all over and around the toilets. There couldn't have been more dried food all over the high chair and tablecloth if I'd have painted it on. I just couldn't live like that even on holiday. Especially with 2 young children and a baby. I know they are on holiday but even so!
Not AF DPs cousin and uncle came for lunch at short notice and brought champagne. I will run it off tomorrow morning 😅

Senseless I find myself easily influenced as well, dh is the worse culprit as he doesn't see anything wrong with a 'few beers' after work. He can easily be AF at a weekend but weeknights he really is stuck in a routine.

His next job which starts in the next 2 weeks is about an hour and 45 mins drive away. He will be leaving at 5.15 and not getting home until 5.30ish so will cut his potential drinking time right down. From experience he will be getting home, having 2 cans, his dinner and bed so that will help me a lot.

I don't mind him going to bed early when he is up at that time and driving and working but I would rather be sober so I can at least read for a few hours.

Dd has come in from dragon boating absolutely buzzing. The team get coaches down from the Team GB dragon boat team. I never knew it was a thing but it is. Anyhow, one of the team GB members was down tonight, he worked with them last month when she had just started doing the drumming. He's approached her and the team manager and told her he is seriously considering offering a trail with Team GB and he and other coaches will be watching her carefully at the 2 competitions they have before the end of the season, and because she is only 15, and tiny she should seriously consider it as they are short of drummers. A drummer is dead weight in that they don't paddle, but a key role. So they want them small, but they have to be able to drum and more importantly push the team.

Apparently he was impressed with her gobbing at a boat full of adults and her really pushing them. And she pulled him up on a count and corrected him. By counting over him, because she knew he was wrong and everyone looked confused and she didn't want to lose the momentum as the finish was coming up and they needed to preserve the momentum they had.

Anyway she's buzzing and not because of a boy so it's all good.

Wasn't dry. Needed a beer after fatclub, it was bad 😂😂😂.

Oh well. DS is now an enabler, and came home with a bottle of wine. FML.

Champagne, MadameF. You couldn't say no!

Agree with MadameF, Senseless. Sending more hugs.

Political situation is terrifying.

Crossed with you Frouby. Dragon boating news is fab. Good for your DD!! Presumably the drummers are like the coxes in rowing? She sounds like a total star, and is obviously very much your daughter in her fearlessness!

Frouby, your dd sounds fab!

Madame - I do drink well over the limit.
I can be AF on certain days but there are days - related to emotional shizzle - when I just can't stop.

The running is great! it really helps me manage stress (when I get to it) and I think it really helps me. I am slow slow slow but I am doing it.

Hi all. Day 2 AF here. Knackered.

Know nothing about rowing dion. Are the coxes the ones that sit at the front and shout at people?

Drummers (apparently) are number 2 in the boat. They have 10 or 20 rowers in a dragon boat. Plus the drummer and the helm. The helm does the steering and is in charge. The drummer sets the pace and is 2nd in comman and is also responsible for motivating them and pushing them on, especially at the end if they are close to another boat as they can see how hard they need to push as they are at the front.

That's all I know and I only know that cos dd keeps telling me.

Just had bloody plumber turn up to fix leaky tap. Was expecting a text message before they came. Kitchen looked like a bombsite and I am still sat in my pjs and scowling into my coffee 😂😂😂. So that was fun, mended it now though.

Dd back at school today. Bracing myself for flounce about school skirt 😂😂😂. Ds last day and back tomorrow. Going to fettle my kitchen, clean the fridge and food cupboard, do a big shop for healthy food and meal plan and generally Get Shit Sorted.

Wasn't dry last night, 3 cans of carling. Which will be my last cans for the considerable future because Fatclub if nothing else. I am 3lbs heavier than the start of the school holidays. I think 2lb of that is bloating though, mainly from lager and will disappear in a few days. My healthy September starts today. Going to walk to school as much as possible, do ponies, do allotmenting, long dog walks and healthy eating plus, most importantly dry nights and moderation.

I also need to do some clothes shopping which I hate. Threw a load of clothes away at the start of the summer and realised I have very few tops other than vest tops, 4 pairs of jeggings/jeans that wont fit until I have another half a stone off and only 2 pair of knocking about jeans that actually fit now.

Might splash out and raid F and F at local Tesco's 😂. Am not one for labels, can never find anything I like (or fits my boobs) in H and M and so on, Next seems to be all synthetic shiny materials and spandangly.

Plus I need to buy jodhpurs. Which is filling me with absolute dread. Fml.

Fab news about DD and drumming Frouby! I can also see you in her when you describe her. She'll go far!

Last day of school holidays for dd1 too though mil is in charge. I have told them dd1 absolutely has to get her thank you letters done that she's been putting off all Summer so hopefully that's successfully delegated. Need to make some decisions tonight re working hours and clubs. Dd2 has more arsing around before school is full time but she has forest school tomorrow and Thursday. Dh us in charge tomorrow which means a 4 bus round trip and a fair bit of walking but he's the muppet who doesn't drive or cycle so I haven't offered to help.

Good old MIL babysat for us last night so we went out for a meal on a barge and a wander round little Venice. I love that I have been nearly 20 years in London and you can still find new bits to explore, plus we stopped at our local which has a cool terraced beer garden like a pagoda which is fun in the summer. 3 halves and a glass of wine so could have been worse but I am actually looking forward to a few days AF now.

Stupid period is going on and on. Must be almost over soon.

Am meeting someone tomorrow who is looking for a job share partner at the grade above me. Could be ideal as her job sounds right up my street, though in some ways less flexible than my current job as I'd be expected to cover half the week plus crossover whereas at the moment I can spread my hours pretty much how I like. Better pay per hour though so swings and roundabouts. Probably a popular role though so not v hopeful.

I need to stop drinking. I tried to do a 100 days of healthy eating and not drinking, and I lasted three, then two days. It’s like I forget all the reasons not to do it as soon as someone (me!) wafts the idea of a cold glass of wine under my nose. Poof! All my good intentions vanish in the blink of a bleary eye.

I am going to post here once a day, just to say, each day, whether I am still dry.

Sorry to drive-by post: in loo before SMART meeting. I'm here. Wish me luck

Good luck Senseless! Well done for making it!

oh God. Good luck, Senseless.

Signing back in after a bad (but very enjoyable) month of overindulging. I think tonight is the first AF night I've had in a month 😬. Feel like rubbish as we lost out in a bidding war on a great opportunity seaside house yesterday & I'm very hormonal too. Coupled with back to school runs & guilt of overindulging & fear of coping without alcohol, it's not too good. Will be looking for box sets to watch for an hour in bed to get into good habits. Had a big wine delivery today too. But won't open the boxes in case of temptation!

Off now to read up on thread & check where everyone is.

Welcome theotherme, I hope you find some support here, we are all in a similar place and felt the same. I try and do 3 or 4 dry days a week, but over the holidays have been struggling with 2!

Dry tonight though, mainly because of kayaking. Though it nearly drove me to drink tonight. Was just going to type why, but am not going to as I just had a thought that the person it concerns might be on here. Lets just say I saw an absolute wankerbastard be an absolute wankerbastard and it made me stabby.

Kids had a blast though. Dd was polo training, ds kayaking with the gang of water rats and had a blast as usual. Swimming in the lake at 7.30pm still, he's bonkers I was bloody freezing just watching him.

Have the worst period turn up. It does explain the bloating and weight gain at fatclub yesterday so every cloud and all that. But am going to take 2 ibuprofen and go to bed with my book.

About halfway through Val Mcdermids Tony Hill/Carol Jordan series if anyone likes a crime detective type series. Tony Hill is a psychologist and Carol Jordan is in the police. Really enjoying them, they are dark and a bit gory but not gratuitously so.

Good luck senseless 💐

Day 3 AF here, still knackered! But not remotely tempted.

Will catch up when I am sober. FML. End of the school holidays tomorrow.

Thank you!

hi theotherme - welcome

Hi buckeejit! - glad you've had a good time

Hi waterandlemon, well bloody done, day 3!

Hi Dion, hope you're ok. yes school holidays can seriously take it out of you

I'm heading home on the train. Kind of enjoyed the SMART meeting. They were cool, funny, interesting people. All at different stages, all with insightful stuff to say, all of them dealing with work, relationship, kids stuff. One guy in the group has a wife going through IVF; one has a wife who has just got pregnant with their first; I'm crossing everything for those guys for the sake of their wives.

I'm heading home on the train now. Here's the thing: I'll talk to boyfriend and I really don't want to tell him where I was. He'll know I was home later than straight from work (unless I let him think I was working, and then he'll give me sympathy for late working that I don't deserve). I could tell him I was meeting friends but then he'll ask who and I'll have to make something up and then I'll feel I'm embroiled in proper lying. We don't lie. I just really don't want to go into it all with him.

What I would like to say is: I went out, I don't want to tell you where and I promise it is nothing that is anti-us or detrimental to our relationship. I wonder if you can say things like that?

You had a (medical) appointment? Would that raise more questions? Glad it was good!

Very quickly... Senseless, I'd just say you were working late, and take the sympathy. If you ever feel ready to tell him, you could then come clean. But perhaps you need to give this a proper go and see if it's helpful in the meantime? Just a thought. Glad it was good, though. This is one time I wish I didn't live in a small place. If I did anything like this, everyone there would know me before I'd even said a word.

Will catch up with everyone else tomorrow. x

Saving place

Senseless - well done on taking that step!! Sounds like you’ll have support there. As for dp, I agree with Dion. Deffo say you worked late. No questions will be asked and no hole to dig yourself out of.
Let us know how it goes, you could be our link into it 🙃

Morning all! Finally packed off dd1 to school. Have quite enjoyed the Summer really, though was much better after work finished. Looked at spreadsheet of hours with DH and trouble is we both ideally need to be in the office on Thursdays which means either a disproportionate commute for a short day in the office or after school club and still haven't quite decided what to do for the best. Might keep it vague and wing it.

Was AF. Aiming for tonight and tomorrow too. Need to go and fetch a shed tonight anyway and tomorrow DH should be out so easier. My aunties are coming back at the weekend but no other plans. They offered to babysit but I don't see them too often so not sure whether to take them up on it.

Neighbour friend had his operation which seems to have gone well, phew.

Political situation is dire but I somehow feel less stressed than I did when you could see the bleak future rushing up to greet you like a Greek tragedy. Feels inevitable now and I am therefore resigned. Anything other than total fiasco = massive bonus. Went to training session about Northern Ireland situation though and that feels pretty grim. Massive mistake to make DUP kingmaker. More Greek tragedy stuff come to pass.