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Wankerbastards and summer sunshine will make us want the bloody wine. But tryers to be dryers won't give up, and ice cold becks blue we will sup.

974 replies

Frouby · 16/07/2019 18:41

Thread 7 for the tryers.

Join us for tips and support for encouraging a more healthy relationship with alcohol. Whether you want to drink less, or not at all, stay in your units or just cut down this is the thread for friendship, support, tips and ideas.

Absolutely no judgements here, but there will possibly be swearing.

Other threads are dotted around but I have yet to master a clicky link.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
35
Frouby · 17/07/2019 15:57

Narrow in the gusset might be a good thread title 😂😂😂.

Welcome Larry 8 days is amazing!

leaving I would be pretty pissed off about the video game as well. I don't let my dcs watch anything violent or graphic, dd still asks at 15 if she can watch 15 films. And so far we have managed to avoid games consoles, though they both have tablets.

longest work in the holidays will be me getting up early 3 or 4 days and doing a few hours then. If ds gets up he will be pleased to be able to sit on his tablet for an hour or 2 eating toast and snacks. If I get desperate and need to concentrate I can usually convince dd to entertain him for half an hour

Am going to take a couple of weeks off anyway, I haven't had a complete break since Christmas so am ok with that. Will probably work the first 2 weeks, have 2 weeks off then do some basic stuff the 3rd 2 weeks. Will still have the invoices and payroll stuff to do for the building business but that takes about 2 hours a week. Have done the corporation tax return today and this months payroll stuff so it's pretty up to date.

Am debating a gin tonight. Dd away super early so will be driving at 5.30am but if I have 1 about 6pm will be fine by then.

I really didn't ought to tho.

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longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 17:19

Yes I have been doing that Frouby but I have to creep ninja-style downstairs as they seem to hear the slightest creak and spring up.

Hmm. Was cava at work picnic. Going to pub later. Could get messy.

longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 17:24

Leaving, yeah. My neighbour grew up in a war zone and says it's influenced his feelings about his kids playing with guns.

NC4Now · 17/07/2019 17:26

I hate shooter games. It was one of my boundaries XH totally ignored too. I didn’t want the boys playing COD or GTA so he seemed to think it was fine for him to play them as long as he didn’t give them the controller to join in, and avoided the really bad bits.
That’s not going to be any interest at all to 5 & 9 year old boys, is it?
Add in all the peer pressure and EVERYONE ELSE plays and I’m on a loser.
DS2 plays games up to a 16 at 13 which I wouldn’t have allowed but I feel like I was beaten down.
DS1 only really plays Skate 3 and only when he can’t actually skateboard because it’s raining.

thisnamechanger · 17/07/2019 17:38

I really didn't ought to tho

Please tell me this is an Enid Blyton reference to dear Sheila 🙏

longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 17:40

Belated welcome Larry, climb aboard! Sorry, was distracted by gusset chat.

leavingAqaba · 17/07/2019 18:27

NC my DH has never played a video/computer game in his life that I’m aware so that part is easy for me, fucks me off even more that the school lets us down. Worst than last year when son watched horror film clips on the school bus on other kid’s tablets. FFS.
longest that shit can go both ways. It’s complex it seems. Most people I have come across who know and have experienced war seem to have no issue with kids exposure to screen violence.

CottonSock · 17/07/2019 18:37

Marking place. I'm fairly moderate but bloody knackered. Lots going on. Good reason for minimal hangovers. So I'm still here.

longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 18:46

Pub has been pushed back to 9pm. Saving grace

longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 18:58

On the topic of growing up too fast, dd2 has just written secret "i love you" letter to friend's little boy. They both just turned 4. Not sure I approve!

Wankerbastards and summer sunshine will make us want the bloody wine. But tryers to be dryers won't give up, and ice cold becks blue we will sup.
Frouby · 17/07/2019 19:14

thisnamechanger it could possibly be subliminally, I read an awful lot of Enid Blyton as a child, but I was very forward and reading independently by 3 and also didn't sleep apparently so my mam used to get a pile of library books and leave them in my room and she was also a big fan.

I had read all the faraway tree books by the time I was 5, and all the wishing chair ones as well. And the secret 7 and famous 5 by the time I started junior school.

Was on sweet valley high by the time I was 9, Stephen King by 12 and Flowers In the Atic by 13. The librarian in our local library made me an honorary adult member as I used to be in 3 times a week just to read as I wasn't allowed to take more than 3 books and wasn't allowed adult books on a childs ticket.

So it's possible I have read it and remembered it. I actually say it quite a lot IRL.

OP posts:
leavingAqaba · 17/07/2019 20:17

Ahh frouby I was also a spontaneous pre school reader (to your extent I’m not sure). My eldest (9) can’t read to any extent that allows him to see the joy or point of it. Breaks my heart. I don’t know how to fix it it. Sad

Frouby · 17/07/2019 20:51

leaving my dd is the same, never reads for pleasure. I was a voracious bookworm, still am but dont get as much time. Nothing particularly clever or worthy, trashy crime detective stuff at the minute. But reading is my favourite thing to do.

I used to get up really early Christmas morning, find a book shaped present and open it and read it by the time my siblings were awake. Could read a childrens book like famous five in a couple of hours. And read an adult sized novel in 1 or 2 sittings.

Too knackered now generally unless I find something I absolutely love. I read a 6 book series in it's entirety over a weeks holiday in Tenerife last year though. But that's because I had the time to do it

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longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 21:00

Dd1 was an absolute slog to teach to read. Tore my hair out over it. You can probably find the evidence somewhere on Mumsnet. Then aged nearly 6 she discovered the secret seven and started reading them independently and she hasn't looked back. She gets as engrossed by a book as a screen (which is very). I'm so pleased because I loved reading (though like you always find something else that needs doing) and she's otherwise a tearaway (in fact I sometimes wonder if it's hyperfocus like DH gets). Dd2 is getting there with much less effort on my part but I'm not sure she has quite the latent love of literature as dd1. Will see.

MadameForest · 17/07/2019 21:18

Hi everyone, thanks for the new thread Frouby and the colicky link Dion!

Have been a little awol, didn't realise how,much 😳 3 weeks into school hols, although last week the DC were in the UK with their dad so that doesn't count. Had a lot of lessons to finish off and the weather has been so good so Ive been outdoors, garden and sport, I've been running every day, cycling and swimming twice a week too. Hopefully that will offset the 40 plus units of alcohol, lots of barbecues with unavoidable alcohol intake
As for reading I'm right there with you Frouby, I was reading at 3 and much to my parents' despair I read and re-read Enid Blyton books a lot. I eve, got through the Hobbit bit gave up half way through the Lord of the Rings trilogy (age 11). A big regret is that I rarely read now.

I hated massages too, can't stay still long enough and it feels too indulgent. Il sure there is a psychological problem there somewhere!

My 12 yr old DS has been banned from the PlayStation for 8 months and he is definitely better for it. The shoot up games are brain numbing. He goes to an activity centre for the holidays 170€ for 8 weeks with lots of theme parks go carting etc. included. Such a bargain, but of course there are some parents who complain it's too expensive 🙄

Other news, my DD passed her Baccalaureate with 'mention bien' which is equivalent to 3 As at A level so I'm really pleased for her. Much better than my scraped through A level grades.

One of my hens is still broody and the kittens are no longer feral due to the lovely children who have stayed in the gîtes over the last few weeks. NC4 a couple of photos for you!
And apologies for the long post.
Not AF but some evenings just one glass of wine which isn't great but better than a bottle!

Wankerbastards and summer sunshine will make us want the bloody wine. But tryers to be dryers won't give up, and ice cold becks blue we will sup.
Wankerbastards and summer sunshine will make us want the bloody wine. But tryers to be dryers won't give up, and ice cold becks blue we will sup.
NC4Now · 17/07/2019 21:32

Kittens!! Squeeeeee!!!! Madame they are adorable ❤️

Another reader at 3 over here. I’m starting to wonder if there is a correlation between early literacy and excess drinking in later life?
DS2 likes to read for pleasure but not DS1. It’s a shame.
Frouby what’s your latest crime read? That’s my bag too. In fact I think it was you who recommended Hit and Run, which was ace.
Not AF here. DS1 has been AWFUL. I’ve limited it to two gin in a tins and a Freddo. Seriously, I bend over backwards for that boy and I get nothing but a load of abuse in return.
Thank god it’s a sad weekend this weekend.

NC4Now · 17/07/2019 21:32

*Dad weekend

MadameForest · 17/07/2019 21:43

Clicky not colicky link 🙄

leavingAqaba · 17/07/2019 22:00

longest I remember you saying your younger one was a pain to teach to read but I’m reeling over the nearly six with secret seven. My youngest (six in November) is on Peter and Jane and I was super with that! My older one (10 in September) couldn’t read secret seven. He is not NT I know but it’s a killer to grasp how far he has to go, how far is possible for him.
And what it means for the future. Ahh god.

leavingAqaba · 17/07/2019 22:02

Good to see you Madame it’s late here. Good night all.

longestlurkerever · 17/07/2019 23:11

Leaving, sorry, I didn't mean to worry/upset you - I think what I meant was she went from 0-60 and perhaps that's what was so frustrating- she clearly could do it but when I was supposed to be reading with her every night (she has an August birthday so had been at school for 2 years by the time she turned 6) she just wouldn't. She'd get up, wander off, turn upside down on the sofa, refuse to even look at the page.
Every night for two years. Eventually I hit on the idea of ditching books and just doing some games with her and that seemed to go slightly better, and then she just picked up the secret seven book from the library and ran with it. Now she reads voraciously and is ahead of the rest of her class and I have no idea if it's because of my efforts or despite them, but she's much the same with most other things- if she wants to do something she's a dream and if she doesn't there is literally nothing you can do about it because she's immune to threat or reward. Her teachers find the same. I have been exploring ADHD and/or dyspraxia with them and think she probably has one if them tbh (DH did/does) but she does settle down given time to build a relationship and work things out on her own terms, so at this time of year her teachers are singing her praises, whereas the Autumn term each year is hellish. I Dd2 is much more plain sailing- she thrives on praise, will concentrate much more easily and if all else fails can be bribed. She's a bit oversensitive if anything - I'm a bit worried about her ability to hold her own at school and I have to use a wholly different parenting style, which doesn't always feel fair on dd1 but at the same time you have to go nuclear at dd1 to have any impatient at all (tbh I should probably just learn to save my breath as it makes no difference).

Ended up just having one glass of wine at pub. Woo.

Sorry you've been having a shit night with dd1 NC4. Hope the freddo helped!

Welcome back Mme F! Congratulations to dd! And squee re kittens. Well done for surviving 3 weeks of holiday.

leavingAqaba · 18/07/2019 05:00

Oh thank you longest that’s kind of you and interesting about your kids. Honestly every bloody thing upsets and worries me when it comes to the abilities of my eldest. It’s draining. For the first couple of years of school it was just me banging on and on. I got a lot of “he’s a boy” “he’ll catch up”. Even DH was in that camp as he doesn’t come from an education system that has expectations of 5 year olds in terms of reading or anything else really. He is great with him now, sitting daily with maths (his greatness weakness) for a bit after work.

Frouby · 18/07/2019 06:21

NC currently halfway through Val Mcdermid Karen Pirie series. It's quite good, first one was very good, second one struggled a bit but am on 4th now and am enjoying them. It's the first time I have read any VM stuff and will definitely read some more.

Have you read the Tana French Dublin Murder Squad series? Loved that. And Jane Casey Maeve Kerrigans series. That was the one I read back to back on holiday last year. Then there are the Vera and Shetland series by Anne Cleeves, and the Simon Serrialer series by Susan Hill. I loved all of those.

I love a good murder detective series but don't like gratuitously violent stuff. Started reading one last week, can't remember what it's called but had to put it down because it was so violent towards women. I found Brenda Bauer the same, good writing and gripping but as the series went on it got more and more violent and then I have nightmares if I read it before going to sleep.

Madame good to see you back. Dd will be over your way later, just dropped her off for her Belgium trip. They are staying in Ypres but heading over the border a couple of times to see various battlefields and museums.

Felt a bit teary dropping her off. Covered it well by beeping the horn and shouting 'bye frouby poopyhead (used to call her that when she was little), mummy loves you, be a very good girl mwah mwah mwah'. She just shook her head and pretended she wasn't with me 😂😂😂.

Dd was good at reading, but looking back at her learning to read she never did that c-a-t cat stage. She just memorised every word as though they were a 'tricky'word and then we had the shock last year that she may be dyslexic. She's never enjoyed reading, and never read for pleasure apart from a couple of books based on some teenage film she had seen.

Ds is learning to read by sounding out and blending but I can't see him being a bookworm either. He's very much like longest dd. He hates reading at home and it's a real struggle to keep him focused unless he needs a couple of star stamps for a certificate at school. He thrives on praise and stickers and rewards though so am going to have to do something like that over the holidays to keep him reading.

I think we worry about our dcs no matter what. Dd is bright, loves school and learning but was a shy, sensitive little soul and I worried about her fitting in socially and still worry how she is going to cope mentally next year with gcses. She has found her little crew of mates though, all a bit geeky and bright and quirky and has settled down socially.

Ds is a livewire. I think he will struggle with discipline and actually doing what he's supposed to do. But socially is outgoing and not intimidated by anyone, no matter how old. He would love to hang around with the teenage kayakers, but also plays with the younger ones. And isn't shy around adults either. But I can see him being bother as he won't conform and lacks a few social skills like being quiet or sussing out someone doesn't really want to play or interact.

Had 3 little bottles of beer last night, am in winding down mode and be glad when ds finishes school tomorrow.

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CottonSock · 18/07/2019 06:51

Longest, your post above could describe my daughter. She's just turned 6. I know she will get there, but it's tough. She's learning two languages to add to complication (Welsh school).

I've had 3 days dry. Going out for a couple tonight and tomorrow. May try and stay dry at home.

My dd has to have a lot of time at home for medical issue. I know we are all going to go stir crazy. My parents are supposed to be having her whilst I work, but not sure they will cope with the giving medicine and possible huge amounts of poo! My mum has early dementia, although no diagnosis..it's really upsetting to see her struggle.

They arrive Sunday so I need to sort house and stock up on food. They are big drinkers so I'm nervous about that. Is it very rude not to buy it for them? Last time I drank it wirh them, got very anxious and didn't sleep their whole visit. Worry about mum also getting confused in new house.

My work has been busy. Had both kids birthdays, and mine, our anniversary. It's been a crazy month. Now we have the medical thing to deal with! Supposed to have a day hiking with dh today, but have clinic with dd first.

I hope you all have a good day

Dionysa · 18/07/2019 07:03

Hungover. Will catch up later... Waves to all...