Wankerbastards will upset us that try, but we will still be dry. Or dryer at a push. It's a good job we are not in a rush.

[Frouby]

Thread 6 for the Tryers to be Dryers.

Support thread for reducing alcohol, stopping alcohol, monitoring alcohol. All welcome, absolutely no judgement. Whatever your aims with alcohol come and join us here. Lots of swearing but no judging or criticising.

Previous threads dotted around but can never do clicky links.

Dion I hear you. I was such a great mum to my toddlers. I did crafts and finger painting. I even made my own playdough. Then everything changed, and changed, and changed again, and my kids don’t go to any activities and I’m lucky to even get them to school.
I need to up my game but I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do with teenagers.

I have bought a BBQ this week because they have been asking for one since we moved in. It’s our houseversary present. That should provide some entertainment.
DS1 loves starting fires and DS2 loves to cook... I just love sitting back with a beer and letting them bring me sausages 😂

NC if you are growing in pots grow what you love. I would do 3 tomatoes in grow bags, 1 does 3 plants perfectly. Then a windowbox with cut and come again lettuce. You could do maybe 4 french beans in a pot up a frame. Strawberries do fab in pots and hanging baskets. Herbs like basil and coriander. And a pot with rosemary will provide all year round gin garnishes as well as a nice addition to your sunday roast.

Only grow what you will eat. Especially if space is limited and I try and concentrate on stuff that tastes significantly better like strawberries and tomatoes. If you are quick you will be able to pick toms and strawberries up from the garden centres now, everything is behind this year because of the weather.

I try and keep ds busy and dd from sulking in her room by forcing them outdoors. When the weather is rubbish I struggle. Am like a cross between mary poppins, david Attenborough and bear gryls in the summer. Come winter we wander around in pjs, looking at weather apps and I swear a lot 😂😂.

Hoping with the late start to summer we have an Indian summer this year.

Dion get you! 2 days dry is fantastic out of 4!

I won't be dry tonight, but not soaking wet either. Am kayaking in the morning on a parent session. Jesus fuck. Then ds has a party 1 til 3. Then sunday am hoping to get to the ponies.

Frouby - that’s fab re your ds. What a gent. You must be mega proud 😊

Longest - hold your head high and block out his moaning. You did amazingly. You have ever reason to be proud of yourself. Don’t let his wining bring you down. I know it’s easier said than done. There’s nothing worse than someone bursting your bubble. And it shouldn’t be your dh. He should be holding you up there, not bringing you down. I think you do so so much for him, that he resents having to do anything himself. I appreciate he’s ill, but that’s no reason to behave that way. You are mega patient with him.

Flying by so hi to everyone else.

Went out with an old friend last night. Shared a bottle of wine. I was happy to stop there but she ordered a second. Feel hungover this morning. Was so lovely to catch up with her though. Know my 16 hr fast is going to prove tricky today 🙈

Oh FML. DD says she was sick last night. This is the second time she has made this claim this week. So, she tells me, she has to be off school for another 48 hours. Am I being a horrible mother not to believe that she was sick? She looks as well as anything, and there's no evidence of her having been sick. I am about to go to work, so will be out until about 6PM (she's old enough to be on her own - that's not the problem). If she's at home, I'm taking her devices with me. She can ring me on the landline if she needs me. Though I now feel like a complete cow, and that if she's really ill, she needs looking after (though I can't not go to work). As I say, FML.

Dion I would give her the benefit of doubt today. And I would say she needs to provide evidence next time, but with teenage girls the last thing you want to encourage is random vomiting episodes.

I would say have the day off and study so devices come with me to work. But if this happens again it's clearly not a bug as no one else is ill and it's happening frequently so we will make a GPs appointment. Am not sure how they will investigate tummy issues, blood tests perhaps and if they don't show anything it's usually an investigation actually into your tummy, so maybe a camera up your bum love. Not pleasant I know but necessary if you are randomly being sick and missing school. So pop yourself back in bed, toast and water today and I will see you at 6ish.

But I am a bit of a rotten mam 😂😂😂

Dion I think that’s totally fine. When DS refuses to go to school I take his devices off him and send him to bed. You didn’t hear her being sick then? I’d be suspicious at that too.
What’s going on at school that she doesn’t like? I skived off a fair bit at her age, especially if there was PE involved.

Frouby strawberries in hanging baskets. There’s an idea. I’ve got a bracket looking for a use and we all love them.
I was always a ‘get them out, tire them out’ kind of mum. Reading your post has reminded me. XH hated doing anything with us, or doing anything outdoorsy, so it all fell a bit by the wayside. I always had to choose between him and them in my marriage.
It feels hard to pick it back up with DS2 now at 13. DS1 is fine - he got into skating and lives at the skatepark. They make me laugh, the skater crew. He did well to fall in with them. I just need to get DS2 off the console.

thanks Dion :)

I have some strawberries in pots that I got 12 plants for a fiver at lidl last year. They are so much better than bought ones, so you don't get so many of course.

Dion - I can see dd1 turning into your daughter!

Nasty cold today but still feel good without a hangover.

Have a good day everyone

Happy Friday everyone - day 5 AF & going to try & stay that way tonight although.... Friday etc.

Aww Dion - what do you think is making her not like school? Is it exam pressure..but I think you said she’s done that. Has she got friendship issues? So hard for you. I’d be suspicious too. I think you’ve done the right thing to let her stay home. No tech. Let us know how things are when you get home x

I’ve got the very worst hangover I remember. I feel totally fucked!! Weak, tired, heart racing, fragile, and my mouth tastes like a badgers bum. No way will I want wine tonight. Dh however has been af all week and has been looking forward to Friday night drinks to celebrate the end of a tough week at work!! Arghhhhhhhhhhh

Oh and dd is being such a cow.

Evening all

Relatively moderate here. 2 g and ts and that's me done. Didn't finish work til gone 6pm, had a gin, had a lovely bath then 1 more and then dinner was here so won't drink anymore.

Dh on the other hand has been steadily drinking since 3.30pm and is right royally getting on my tits. He's currently arguing with the dog who is barking at him for a biscuit. She's barking at him because he constantly titbits her and has him well trained.

Am hoping she shuts up long enough for him to nod off on the sofa. Have a plan involving my bed and my kindle and it doesn't involve a snorey annoying fucker.

Am really noticing how annoying mildly or very drunk people are. Or maybe just how annoying dh is. He was dry over the weekend and Monday, been drunk every night since. And it's irritating.

He's noticed it's annoying me as well. Says he will cut down then doesn't. Obviously I know how difficult it is. But I don't think he even wants to moderate.

No good speaking to him now. And he will probably not drink tmrw or sunday. I might download a drink tracking app to his phone, log out much he actually drinks and try some scare tactics.

Anyway. Am kayaking tomorrow morning so wish me luck. Then a birthday party to go to with ds. So will probably not be dry.

Frouby - dh pisses me off too when pissed. He becomes childish and annoying. Then falls asleep on the sofa and snores!! Then wakes up an arsehole!! He’s deffo more attentive when he hasn’t had a drink.
Good luck with kayaking.

Dion - how’s dd?

Right, this will be a new challenge! Going to be AF today (Saturday), as I have to run DH to a bus at 1 in the morning.

I have some alcohol free rose wine. My usual tippple is white wine, but I find the low alcohol versions such a disappointment, that I find it better to have something that isn't even pretending to be Chardonnay.

Flossie it's annoying isnt it. He also wakes up early when he's been drunk and wakes me up as well. He's currently got a face like a slapped arse because he wanted to go to the allotment today and ds has a birthday party this afternoon.

Pointed out he can still go himself, we can go after the party or we could have gone any night after work (he's home for 4pm at minute).

But obviously that might interfere with drinking time. Or relaxing time. Or watching shit tv time.

He's really getting on my tits at the moment. He moans we never do anything. What he means is we don't do what he wants to do which is go to the pub. Or spend an hour on the allotment first thing on a weekend morning so he can come home and doss on the sofa for the rest of the day while I do the housework and wrangle ds and walk the dog and cook.

I think he needs to go to the doctors and discuss his anti depressants again. But I also know he would feel better mentally if he cut down drinking. So my sympathy is fairly limited.

Anyway. Enough moaning. What's everyones plans this weekend? I am kayaking this morning 😮, party this afternoon for ds then not sure this teatime. Tomorrow I want to get to the ponies, dh will want to go to the allotment, then ironing, cooking dinner and generally getting ready for a new week.

I’m such an idiot. I really enjoyed feeling like I had some energy yesterday and getting on with things. So why did I drink two bottles of Prosecco last night?
Because it’s weekend? What difference does that make to anything?
I’m starting to think I may have to go completely AF if I can’t stop when I start. It was totally uncalled for and I’ve wasted today to a hangover too. FML.

I drank 2/3 bottle wine and have reflux. But that's the first time I've not finished a bottle for a while. I don't usually buy them. It wasn't all that great to be honest. I was tired and stressed with kids so caved. My birthday weekend so will not be af today or tomorrow. Posh lunch out today and then a vin yard!
Dd2 is still decided she's potty training. I might put a nappy on so I can relax for lunch... not good timing.

Frouby - send us a pic of kayaking. Dh is wanting to take our girls kayaking too today. trouble is, it’s not that simple for dd2. He doesn’t seem to get it. Fml!! I think he lives in dream world. We live on the river and it would be amazing to get on the water tho.
Hope dh behaves himself today 😉

Cotton socks - reflux is awful. Was it a diff type of wine than you’re used to? Happy birthday. Have a lovely weekend.

NC4 - don’t beat yourself up. We all do it.

Was af yest. Not through self strength. But because I had hangover from hell. Slept so much better according to my Fitbit and feel so refreshed today too.

Here you go Flossie. Live shot of me kayaking.

Just back from a party with ds. Jesus fuck. One of those in a hall with an entertainment team. 30 kids screaming plus spiderman and belle.

Cracked open a beer. Don't even care, amd debating going to the pub for tea. Am knackered and dh hasn't done a food shop so it is either tea out or something on toast. Am ok with drinking though. Had 4 gins since last Saturday.

You look well happy there Frouby! Don’t blame you for the beer at all. Bloody hell, those kids parties are torture. I’m glad we’re past that.

I’m at risk of undoing all my good work this week. All the Prosecco last night, washed down with a Maccies today to ease the hangover. DS1 gave me a bollocking over drinking - said I can’t give him grief over the bad things he does and then go and do that to myself. The kid’s got a point.

I’m just getting my nails and eyebrows done - both are long overdue, so at least I’ll look neater, if a little haggard.

Yayyyyyyy frouby , you look ace!! And mega good!! How did you find it?? We’ve just been to a kayak shop looking. Ffs, I’m happy hiring. Dh is ‘all the gear and no idea’!!

I loved it, really really enjoyed it. Was harder than I thought amd very physical. But I can't wait for next Saturday and am definitely making us all a member so I can go every week.

Bizarrely it's also made me want to ride again seriously. I think it was the buzz of using my whole body to do something physically demanding as well as mentally demanding. And going from not having s clue to being able to move it where I wanted it to go.

Seriously impressed with ds now I have jad a go, he's much better than me 😂😂😂

That sounds brilliant Frouby. I'm looking around for a kayak club for us to go to now. Both boys enjoy it on the odd occasion we've done it. I'm sure there must be somewhere near here we can do it.
DS1 and I kayaked in the sea in Lanzarote which was absolutely lush. The water was so clear it was unbelievable.
How long before we are all slightly more sober kayakers?

Frouby you are a natural

Woo frouby 👍🏾

Gosh Frouby you look great! Cool and powerful and in control.

I had a third of a rather nasty tin of lager today and threw the rest away. As I was expecting, it was a busy day and towards the end, the kids were getting on my every last nerve. BUT. I am not drinking. I've just eaten a mango - which is dd1's favourite - and I thought "I shouldn't have that without dd1." then I thought "fuck it I will, she will never know". She's been to two lovely events today and stuffed her face with treats.

NC4 sorry to hear you've been feeling grim. I know the feeling. I hate the feeling. Sending sympathy to you.

I'm feeling very fat today but I don't care, I've got lots done and I'm sober.