Wankerbastards will upset us that try, but we will still be dry. Or dryer at a push. It's a good job we are not in a rush.

[Frouby]

Thread 6 for the Tryers to be Dryers.

Support thread for reducing alcohol, stopping alcohol, monitoring alcohol. All welcome, absolutely no judgement. Whatever your aims with alcohol come and join us here. Lots of swearing but no judging or criticising.

Previous threads dotted around but can never do clicky links.

Pic

He’s so lovely. Cat spam - sorry not sorry!

Thats one big, handsome cat NC, he looks so cuddly. And that kitten is very cute as well Madame. Will you keep them? They look very young, I wonder if they have been dumped and found their way to yours? Are they hissy? Feral kittens are usually pretty savage even when very young.

I don't know why people have animals and don't do their best by them. We have a menagerie but each and every one is looked after properly. Even the stray fancy pigeon we rescued a couple of summers ago has his own house, is exercised daily and actually bosses us around 🕊😂😂. The picture is him glaring in the window at me to be let back to bed the other day while I was trying to work.

Had my 3 gins last night and feel ok this morning. Weather is pretty rubbish, not as much rain as yesterday but its not particularly warm and very overcast and drizzley. Will probably plough through the housework, might tackle the ironing if I can get the uniforms washed and dried.

DH was pissed as a fart. Currently laid in bed mumbling about cooked breakfasts. He can stay there. He's annoyed me this week and I have noticed how much he is drinking. Need to do something about that but until he wants to reduce himself I don't know what. He will be dry today and tomorrow probably and think he's doing well. But he's definitely drinking far too much in the week. And it's just habit. Get in from work, open can of lager. He needs to take up kayaking with ds 😂.

Lovely cats!

Check out dd2's culinary handiwork and photography.

Slightly less proud of cake which is crumbling tower of goo. Need to attempt rescue job with fondant icing.

Definitely drank too much wine last night. Didn't sleep well, woke up feeling meh. DH and I have pact never to open second bottle. Remind me to stick to it!

Frouby - I had ivf for both my girlies. It’s wonderful when it works, and heart breaking when it doesn’t. Wishing them so much luck x

Aww Madame , will you keep them? How many of them?

Longest - hope it goes well.

Water - it is never just one glass tho. The one glass was the one I had early in the evening alone, down in one, to blot the crap out. Followed by a bottle later on.

NC4 how was the Pt?

I moderated with just under half a bottle of red last night. And actually threw half a glass away before making a cuppa!!

The IVF is heartbreaking bless them. They have had 3 cycles already plus several rounds of something else but I can't remember what. They are desperate to be parents, particularly cousins wife. And are both really good with them. Cousin is like the most funny auntie in the world ever, and her wife is like a mother hen.

I wish I could make it work for them I really do.

Been shopping for food for the weekend, blitzed my upstairs and just about to start downstairs. Dh is annoying me, just flopping around sighing. What's with the fucking sighing? He's sighing because he has a hangover. He also had a madras and lots of beer so his arse smells like death.

Apparently I an bu for opening the windows to let air in, and if I think it smells of fart I should say so. So I did and he was all offended and upset.

Apparently saying he smells like a dead badger has crawled up his arse and died a bit more isn't the answer he was looking for. Fuck sake.

Dead badger, Frouby. 🤣 And I'm gobsmacked by your moderation.

Trying to catch up after having been away for a bit, visiting DS. I have skimmed, but will read properly.

Flossie, I'm so glad your DH is being nicer. He must surely see that you having wine to 'take the edge off it' is a way of saying you're finding DD's illness very hard to cope with. You can do it. 💐

Loving all the photos. Kittens, Madame! ❤️❤️

This week has been a write-off for me one way and another. Stayed with DP last night, who has been away with work, so that was very much not dry (not sure I remember the going to bed bit). I am aiming for AF tonight, though DD is being such a horrible little madam that I might not manage it. A simple: "Have you got your key?" produced a sneer and a "Well, why would I need it? It's not as if you're going out, is it?"

And so on. FML.

I think I want to get to a point where I don’t drink alone at home. It doesn’t add anything to my life. I’ve just somehow come to believe it does. How do I change my mindset? NC4, you say it for me.

Longest, I was going to say I'm glad I'm no longer doing children's parties. Then I remembered about teenage ones. I am never having one again.

Lol Dion 😂 DS1 has just broached the subject of having a BBQ for his birthday - low key, just a few mates. I’ve only just recovered from last year.
You know the scene at the start of the Hobbit, where a bewildered Bilbo Baggins keeps answering the door to more and more uninvited guests, in twos and threes, hell bent on having a party?
I was Bilbo.
Longest your DDs culinary creations look lovely. Very colourful.
Frouby it’s days like that I’m glad I’m single. An alternative to opening the windows would be to put DH out, like a cat.
Ozzy is a big handsome baby, super cuddly. He’s a crap hunter too, so I don’t have to deal with dead things. He prefers Hula Hoops.

Oh God, NC4. I had to do the whole "If YOU and YOU and YOU don't leave my house THIS MINUTE, then THE WHOLE PARTY IS OVER" thing. It is the one occasion when I was sorry not to be married any more. I'm minuscule, and taking on a group of 6 foot teenagers who are bellowing about vodka is no fun at all.

Oh god Dion I did too.
They were quite unpleasant sorts actually. I took one lad into the back alley and told him he and his pals could leave quietly now, or I’d have the police come and remove them. Gave them 5 minutes.

Cheeky bastards robbed my blue tooth speaker when they left. Arseholes.

I was a legend among DS friends mind 😂

Oh God, Dion and NC4, that sounds utterly grim. My cousin's friend actually got murdered at a teenage party that got out of hand. He was on a documentary : one punch killers. Truly awful.

Puts a bunch of four year olds shrieking over musical bumps into perspective. Cake looked worse after my rescue attempt do have handed it over wholesale to dds to do their worst. Though dd1 has adopted the tone and eyeroll of a sulky teen already.

Hugs to all dealing with family stress.

Lol!

Longest that’s horrific. I’ve sat through a lot of murder trials and worked with victim’s families and the impact is so far reaching.
It’s definitely had an impact on my parenting.

Sorry DD has turned teenage on you. I think we need a picture of the cake to lighten the mood 😂

We crossed posts!! That is a MAGNIFICENT cake!! I love it 😂

That cake is a thing of beauty! It's amazing!

On the becks blue here. Did debate over shoving a bottle of wine in the fridge but want a really nice sleep tonight. Have changed the bedding, had a lovely long bath and even used a face mask. So I said I would have gin if I fancied it. But I don't fancy gin. I fancy beer or wine but fancy a good kip more.

So I updated my drink aware app, and look at it. 3.9 units all week. Fuck a duck.

So being virtuous, sticking to the AF stuff and polishing my halo, while simultaneously worrying about dd who will be bloody freezing. Shes gone in running leggings, a running top, waterproofs and a light fleece jacket. It's really not warm here. It's rained all day on and off and is pretty miserable. I asked her and told her to pop a hoodie on this morning but she wouldn't as she was worried about the weight in her bag which had to be no more than 12kg, and the tent weighs 4 kg and the bag 2 kg.

Plus other essential bits of kit. Just hoping that maybe some of the boys have taken a spare hoodie or fleece she can borrow. She's very dramatic when she gets cold, goes purple/blue and shivers very dramatically so they won't be able to ignore a blue girl I don't think.

I'm sure they'll take care of her Frouby. I did my DofE in the most ridiculous torrential storm you have ever seen. The roads on our map were unmistakable from rivers. We were hours late and sodden and when it came to camping and campfires the instructors just said fuck that and took us to the pub for pie. We slept in the laundry room of the campsite. Still got my badge.

I am in awe Frouby, truly. You put me to shame. I am defo having wine tonight but reinstated rule will be stuck to. Cannot face kids' party with a hangover so it has to be.

Someone said I might have tips re a long AF stretch. I have been reflecting and don't know if I do. Nanny state helped. It helped that it was January and being dry was socially acceptable. It was doable, but not enjoyable. I felt resentful I had started it tbh as life felt dull and flat without wine, which felt like a harsh lesson. On the other hand I felt healthier, more productive, less guilty. Swings and roundabouts. I suppose it renewed my resolve for moderation being the holy grail best of both.

Bloody Hell, Longest. That's quite some horrible thought. The cake is amazing, though.

NC4, I wasn't a legend with DD at her party. She just said I was hideously embarrassing, not least as I "sound so posh". FML.

I am shamed by Frouby, too. Intended to be dry, but I'm not. FML again. DP has bothered me. So has DD. So has DS. I need to find ways to deal with them all.

Ahh Frouby I’m a dramatic cold type too. My teeth chatter and I have to jump up and down. Being cold to me is like being in pain. Your poor DD.
It’s rained most of the day here too, so I’ve not bothered with the gala. I’m bored as hell.
It’s proper shit that my friend’s fallen out with me but I really don’t want histrionics and I’m pretty bloody mad at the things she said to me the other day, so I’m not going to go there. She can get in touch when she can have a reasonable conversation instead of telling me what I think and where my loyalties are.
Funnily enough, I’m pretty clear on all those things, and they aren’t what she says.
Luckily I’ve got the hide of a rhino so I’m not really hurt by it, but that doesn’t mean I have to accept being insulted by her. I won’t.
Makes for a very boring Saturday night though....

Ahh you see there’s your downfall Dion. I sound common as muck

Me too NC, except on the phone. I have a lovely telephone voice, left over from my banking days. My VM is left over from when I used to run my own business before ds so its all professional and posh northern sounding, well posh compared to me usual voice.

Dsis once rang me for something, it went to answerphone and all I could hear when I picked up the vm was her hysterically laughing. Cowbag.

Just noticed there is a teenage party happening tonight at the house at the back of us. Vile girl she is as is the mother. The dd bullied my dd horribly a few years ago along with another girl on the road. I eventually caught the pair of them being vile and sent them home crying to their mothers.

The other girl came back with her mam an hour later to apologise lol. I know the other mam and phoned her to say that I had bollocked her. The other mam turned up and started mouthing off at me. Nice mam who is a bit of a rough arse went to intervene. I stopped her, let horrible mam rant and rave at me, asked her if she'd quite finished then told her how vile her dd had been, how lucky it was that it was my dd she had been vile to and not someone elses as they would have involved the police and the school with it all. And unless the dd was grounded for at least a fortnight I would be presenting the text messgages and fb messages she had sent dd to police and to school.

And if she fancied throwing her considerable weight around a bit more she was more than welcome to have a go at me if she wanted to.

She just turned and flounced off but I didnt see the dd around for a few weeks and they have never said boo to dd since.

Hoping the party doesn't go on too long. If dh snores tonight I am sneaking into dds bed and her room is on the back. Dh was muttering about a film earlier, some clint Eastwood thing. Sigh. Not my cuppa at all.

Kids still not in bed and I have been pushed beyond limits of endurance. Kids have been making mess quicker than I can tidy it, mixing "junk modelling' with icing and God knows that else. Everything that's not sticky is greasy because dishwasher test was useless as well as rude. Can't keep up and mice are back. Shrieked at kids like harridan for arguing back about bath and bed. Feel a bit ashamed. Can't help but feel I might have had more patience if I hadn't opened second bottle last night.

I admire both of you, legends in your DC eyes or not, for having the authority to deal with teenagers. I have none over anyone. And my accent falls somewhere between the cracks so I am too posh back home and too Scouse here to ever truly fit in.

Oh Longest, that is so kind of you. I am absolutely crap with teenagers (I was brilliant with toddlers - though I was teetotal then, which might have helped ). What's funny is that DD is as posh as I am, only she pretends she isn't. The thing she most objected to was me telling her she was absolutely not going to the lavatory with one of her (male) friends, when she said she needed to show him the way. There's only one loo in our titchy house, FFS, and you really don't need a guide to find it.

Frouby, I hope you manage to avoid Clint Eastwood.

I have had some (ahem) gin, but have now stopped because it's a complete waste of time and I have to get up at 5AM.

Lol Dion, My lot were most respectful on the toilet front. They were sat all up my stairs (on my cream carpet ) but as soon as I popped my head out of the front room and asked if there was a queue, the lad at the front said, ‘yes, but you’re at the front’ then banged on the door, saying ‘hurry up, DS’s mum needs the loo!!’

Once I’d got rid of the idiots, they were a pretty decent bunch of teenagers really.

On the gin front - well done on stopping. I’ve had (ahem) some Prosecco. I went to the counter with two little bottles and shop man said, ‘you should get a full one, it’s weekend!’
So with absolutely zero will power or self control, I said ‘I should really, shouldn’t I?’
And therein lies the rub. Easily led. Every bloody time 😂

Oh God NC4 the world is full of enablers isn't it? How do other people navigate this so easily I want to know?!

I did, I think, stick to my limit last night. Half the trouble is DH is a wine nerd. He's always opening new bottles if he thinks the original one is "off" or "needs more air" so there's always an open bottle or two with a vacuvin stopper in it. Takes more willpower (and maths).

Oh joy. Kids are in kitchen. Two things I have overheard "Come on let's make slime. Here's the food colouring" and "can you get some more boxes from the rubbish for our toy hotel?". Is lost cause. Going to sit here with coffee and fingers in my ears and try to look at job application.